Sunday, June 16, 2019

531 - Holy Ghosts and Inappropriate Crackers

[8:25 AM] 
If they were "wearing" ashes, the holiday would be much more interesting.
[8:32 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
heh
[8:34 AM] 
Best part about that fun-filled article on Ash Wednesday is the end:
“Anyway, Jesus said anyone doing it is an a-hole, so...”
[8:45 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
Soon ashy foreheads will be a fashion accessory
[8:51 AM] 
Always looks like they bonked their head on something and got a bruise.
I didn't let 'em do it to me when I was in Catholic school
[8:51 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
I don't recall ever getting any shit on my forehead



[11:57 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
"Didn't i tell you not to do anything big or attract attention?"
[11:59 AM] 
"But it's in my mother's name."
[11:59 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
"I don't care whose name it's in. Take it back!"
You'd have to be fucking stupid as Hell to commit fraud and then build the biggest house in the state
[12:00 PM] 
I mean...they got suspicious looking at it while flying over in a jet airliner
[12:02 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
He should've paid more for the property and less for the house
cuz it's on a relatively small lot
Instead of a 39,000 sq. ft. house, how about maybe 200 acres and a "modest" 10,000 square foot house
[12:02 PM] 
Idiot
Also still the most popular blog entry
[12:04 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
His house looks stupid as Hell
[12:04 PM] 
Total McMansion, yes
[12:04 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
yes
[12:05 PM] 
Favorite line from McMansion Hell's site recently was in PA... maybe even locally:
"How many different shaped windows do you need before you feel rich?"
Nocito's house isn't on the site though...probably never will be unless some interior shots become available.
"No attorney was listed for Mr. Nocito."
[12:13 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
[12:13 PM] 
Let’s see... Guilty as Hell, and not likely to be able to pay anything.  Most lawyers will jump on THAT.
Nice pic :D
[12:15 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
I assume the state takes possession of the house
Its not like anyone's going to want to buy that thing for anything close to what was originally paid for it
It'd be too gaudy for the Hollywood Hills
It'll sit empty and fall into disrepair
"Nocito's Folly"
[12:31 PM] 
Make a National White Collar Crime Museum of it?
(tour guide) "Fun fact - your admission fee to the exhibits pays for the staff, display development and things like...oh...utilities and such.  But the physical maintenance of the house and grounds is still entirely paid for by the flow of stolen and laundered funds and other commodities. Kind of a 'living exhibit', if you like!"
[12:36 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
"And there's the phone where he used to make calls to his dirty accountant."
[12:54 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
This house is on the scales of the Winchester House
You just keep adding and adding until you can't even use it as a house
[12:57 PM] 
The mansion has 160 rooms spanning 24,000 square feet over six acres. There are 2,000 doors, 10,000 windows, 47 fireplaces, 40 stairways, 13 bathrooms, six kitchens, three elevators and two basements
(that's the Winchester)
Though I assume that's after subtracting the parts that collapsed in the original
[12:57 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
It was supposed to keep the ghosts confused
So you believe ghosts can go through walls? Yes! But you still built all these fake rooms and doors?
How has building this maze mansion actually helped ?
[1:01 PM] 
I kinda get what she was going for.  But the plans were drawn from the results of seances and such.
I mean...it's been a masking technique since pre-literate times that just turning your shirt inside out will make a spirit think you are the wrong person and stop following you.
(I have used these techniques)
(I have one on me now...need to change it, actually)
[1:07 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
I've never heard of this house before
reading now
It was a nice spot for a mansion at one time but now it's in a business district next to an 8 lane highway
[1:15 PM] 
Winchester House?
Surprised you never heard of it.
Or perhaps you did but it never really stuck
There's some diner/restaurant thing in California that I know about but can never remember much about like that 
[1:42 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
Maybe i heard the name but didn't know much about it
Like where it was or how its built
The name only rings a bell but not its story
So this lunatic just kept adding on
There are doors and stairs that lead nowhere
Windows that look out on other rooms
[1:54 PM] 
Yes...all to confuse the spirits of those killed by Winchester guns.
[1:55 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
Seems more like just a bored old lady with unlimited funds and declining health
[1:56 PM] 
Paranoid and gullible...but I wouldn't say bored



[1:54 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
So i tried the Ghost Fire stick from this company https://www.countrymeats.com/
Not that hot at all
supposed to be ghost pepper
but i've had that.
This was nowhere near that
[1:55 PM] 
(Mr. Brown's Soul) "OMG THAT'S SPICY!!!"



[12:36 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
Leaping elk crashes low-flying research helicopter in Utah
[12:44 PM] 
(bleeding hands reach out from wreck of helicopter...pull pen and clipboard closer.  Shakily scratches "12'" off the "vertical leap" box.  Scrawls "18'".  Collapses.)
[12:45 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
heh
[12:51 PM] 
I looked it up. The previous on record was 8'
It beat 8' by a lot according to this report
[12:56 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
“The two people in the helicopter were not seriously injured. The elk died.”
That sentence is great



[10:50 AM] 
Agent - Chunko, Chuck
[10:50 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
I'll just have a bite, thanks!
[10:51 AM] 
(touch nose, point at Mr. Blue)
[Me squirming, looking at the profile] ("Don't say 'the clown'! Don't say 'the clown'! Don't say 'the clown'! Don't say 'the clown'!")
"Ok Mr. Chunko...Chew..."
[10:52 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
Heheh
Yours is good too
[10:52 AM] 
"And this is my wife Cocoa...and my daughter Strawberry and son Nutty."
[10:53 AM]  Mr. Blue: 
heh



[2:00 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
All my earliest Halloween costumes would be bad today
ghost [ableist], devil [occultism appropriation], cowboy [racist], Indian [super racist], The Jazz Singer.
[2:02 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
Zwarte Piet – UBER RACIST
[2:02 PM] 
Silver Junior's first was Hellboy
Red onesie, little horns, one big red glove
[2:03 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
That's badass
[2:04 PM] 
Zwarte Piet is only racist to people who want him to be, far as I can tell.
If the tradition was to wear a black devil mask, no one would give a flyin' F
[2:04 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
The racism would need to be in either its intent or its origins, and it's a No on both
[2:11 PM] 
The Jazz Singer huh? 
Guessing it wasn't the Neil Diamond version. 
Though I suppose either...
Wonder what he thought about them casting Lawrence Olivier as his dad in that movie.
"Any chance of casting anyone...you know...Jewish?"
[2:17 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
“Laurence Olivier IS Zwarte Piet in “Othello”!"
[2:21 PM] 
That's the Shakespeare one about the board game, right?
The game's name is, in fact, kinda racist.
"Laurence Olivier's 'Othello', the GAME!  A contest between two players who put down white pieces that have a black face."
[2:24 PM]  Mr. Blue: 
heh
I never thought of that
[2:25 PM] 
Neither did I til just now
(looks up)
The name was selected by Hasegawa as a reference to the Shakespearean play Othello, the Moor of Venice, referring to the conflict between the Moor Othello and Iago, and more controversially, to the unfolding drama between Othello, who is black, and Desdemona, who is white.
[2:41 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
The second one is amazing
Darkies in the Melon Patch
[2:44 PM] 
And the fact that it's a new fraud to scam Americana goobers is a bonus
[2:45 PM]  Mr. Brown.: 
Ghettopoly
wow
hahah
Wouldn't it be racist to have a game called Find the Cracker
[2:58 PM] 
Hung out with the creators and played it with them
And...it's not racist because they took their own photographs of local stuff in their area for the cards, etc.
at

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