Day 257 - "Spliplify, Spliplify", She Seems Nice But Is Frigid As Well As Dry, Tricky Text, I Want To See A Meatier Shower Some Day, Crocodile Milk, Building The Anti Virus, and Going Around Half Naked

11:03 AM Mr. Silver

So...yesterday we went to get ice cream.

11:04 AM Mr. Amethyst

Awe yea!

11:05 AM Mr. Silver

I'd seen people in the past ordering this white one called "Harvest Moon"; a flavor with no description on it.

"What flavor is this, anyway?"

"Well...no flavor."

"Really?"

11:06 AM Mr. Amethyst

For real?

LOL

11:06 AM Mr. Silver

"Yeah.  It's just straight unflavored ice cream.  Wanna sample?"

“Sure!”

11:06 AM Mr. Amethyst

Placebo ice cream?

11:07 AM Mr. Silver

It's just churned frozen cream and sugar.

Honestly, it was quite nice.  I got a double scoop.

11:09 AM Mr. Brown

LOL

The spliplicity of things sometimes is what makes it.

11:09 AM Mr. Silver

If you say so.

Mr. Brown

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2389815/No-slacking-Fearless-female-higliners-perform-jawdropping-moves-3-300-feet-air-Yosemite-National-Park.html

10:25 AM Mr. Silver

Nice.

10:25 AM Mr. Brown

I'm not understanding the underwear one, but nice.

LOL

10:58 AM Mr. Silver

The underwear one?

Ah...figured it was a bikini bottom.

10:59 AM Mr. Amethyst

Oh LOL

11:18 AM Mr. Brown

The Crocs are dying out; and I’m talking about my shoes.

LOL

I like them, but when they are 30 bucks, that's too much.

11:20 AM Mr. Silver

Especially when it's 2 cents worth of foam injected into a mold.

11:20 AM Mr. Brown

Yeah, you can get knock-offs for $10. Crocs are garbage.

11:20 AM Mr. Brown

Yeah, but they don't last as long.

11:21 AM Mr. Amethyst

They scream "Rob me, I cant chase you in these".

11:21 AM Mr. Brown

Um

I can!

LOL

I’ll kick the bitches off!

11:22 AM Mr. Amethyst

LOL

11:22 AM Mr. Brown

Maybe even throw them to slow the guy down.

lol

11:23 AM Mr. Amethyst

Again...they're 2 cents of foam.

11:24 AM Mr. Brown

Hey! Croc brand is at least 2 grams heavier than the counterfeits!

LOL

They will stop in amazement, maybe, and then you've got them.

11:26 AM Mr. Brown

i like them cause they air out well and are completely water proof

i swear in 3 more min i'm going to have frost bite hter e

lol

11:34 AM Mr. Silver

(shakes head) I vaguely saw this:

    11:26 AM Mr. Brown

    i like them cause they air out well and are completely water proof

    i swear in 3 more min going to have frost bite hter e

But then I got confused and thought he was still talking about the high-wire girl and her underwear.

11:36 AM Mr. Silver

"Her underwear airs out well and are completely waterproof?”

“But in 3 more minutes he swears "her" would have frostbite?"

"I guess don't have to ask 'her what?' of course, but...."

"Oh! He means the Crocs!"

11:39 AM Mr. Amethyst

poǝs ʇɥıs ɥnɹʇ ʎonɹ qɹɐıu¿

11:39 AM Mr. Silver

No

I learned to read all directions as a kid.

11:41 AM Mr. Amethyst

LOL

11:41 AM Mr. Silver

Mrs. Silver or Junior will read something across from or sideways to me and I'll read it that way from where I am. I can do mirror image all directions too unless the font is too weird.

Nice trick though.  How do you do it?

11:46 AM Mr. Amethyst

Internet

LOL

11:47 AM Mr. Silver

Thanks a lot.

Mr. Silver

Bah! Humbug!

I'm still irritated about last night.

3:13 PM Mr. Amethyst

?

3:13 PM Mr. Silver

I've yet to see an even poor meteor shower.

3:13 PM Mr. Amethyst

DAMN IT! I forgot!

I’m in the same boat.

3:19 PM Mr. Silver

Granted, I got to see a huge one cross the whole sky leaving a bright white streak once...

3:37 PM Mr. Silver

We went out to find a dark spot at 10:30-ish...nada.

I didn't expect much though...I knew it should be too early for a proper shower even though it was the peak night.

3:37 PM Mr. Amethyst

Right

3:38 PM Mr. Silver

Meanwhile, Mrs. Silver and Junior both said they saw some... Ok...

3:38 PM Mr. Amethyst

LOL

3:38 PM Mr. Silver

Anyway, we decided to go home to bed and wake up at midnight to go back out.

3:38 PM Mr. Amethyst

Nothing?

3:39 PM Mr. Silver

I saw 1 tiny one.

1 even smaller, if it wasn't an illusion.

And one “ok” one - not too bright or long.

All I really got was a neck ache and a groggy morning.

The wife and kid both claimed they saw 5 or 6.

AUGH!

While getting into the car, I said that stuff like this is why I lost interest in astronomy. Its always “best” somewhere else, overcast, raining, I had to miss it, or I see nothing.

Mr. Brown

http://www.google.com/search?q=Croc+sharp+cheddar&rls=com.microsoft:en-us:IE-SearchBox&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=RCsKUpsvpK7JAZTogNgM&ved=0CAkQ_AUoAQ&biw=1080&bih=700

I got this cheese at Walmart other day.

Good cheese.

9:01 AM Mr. Silver

"Made from crocodile 'milk'."

9:04 AM Mr. Silver

"Rich sharp and flavorful, but few men will, and most women won't, swallow it."

9:05 AM Mr. Brown

I like it.

9:05 AM Mr. Brown

Fills the nostrils.

9:08 AM Mr. Silver

No comment...

Though I do like a good cheese and don't want to defame one on the blog. Jokes aside, it's nice stuff, then?

9:08 AM Mr. Brown

I like it.

It's not soft. Kind of in between hard and soft.

It has good aroma.

9:09 AM Mr. Silver

Pricey?

9:09 AM Mr. Brown

I didn't think was too bad to try

9:09 AM Mr. Silver

So I think I want to program a piece of spyware, or preferably a trojan.

9:13 AM Mr. Amethyst

I’m listening.

9:13 AM Mr. Silver

What it does is, it gets into the system and really digs in deep.

And it hijacks the browser to make it be what the user sets it to be no matter what tries to take over.

9:14 AM Mr. Amethyst

So, a re-hijacker.

That's a good idea.

9:14 AM Mr. Silver

It also hijacks all browser search functions and forces the browser to use only legitimate search providers.

9:15 AM Mr. Brown

So its an anti-hijacker hijacker.

9:15 AM Mr. Silver

Right.  It also rigs the system so that any invasive popup doesn't work.

9:18 AM Mr. Silver

I suggest we set it up to infect as many computers as possible.

Hell, I suggest we sell it, advertising it as exactly what it is. “Mr. Silver's Patented Make-It-Work-Right Virus! Click here to infect your PC with the most effective anti-crapware trojan available. Your contributions are appreciated!”

Mr. Amethyst

Freaking expensive for under shirts.

12:18 PM Mr. Amethyst

That's like boxers: $16 for 3 pair.

12:18 PM Mr. Silver

I guess it's because the industry knows we'll wear them til they are a blown-out elastic band with flaps of cloth attached.

12:19 PM Mr. Brown

It's $16 unless you want comfort, Mr. Amethyst, then its $20 or more.

12:20 PM Mr. Amethyst

That’s why Mrs Amethyst says things like "I can see your nuts through these!”

"I don't care, put them in the drawer!"

12:20 PM Mr. Brown

Hell. Sometimes they wear out in the ass so much they are see-through.

No holes, just see-through.

LOL

12:28 PM Mr. Amethyst

I have some that have holes.

12:28 PM Mr. Blue

Most of my socks have holes on the ankle bone thing that sticks out. That happens pretty much immediately. It must be from rubbing inside the hockey skate boot.

12:32 PM Mr. Gray

That or you are growing a claw on the side of your foot like some velociraptor mutant man.

12:32 PM Mr. Blue

I wish.

12:32 PM Mr. Gray

If I hear screaming, I'll know the truth.

12:33 PM Mr. Blue

Speaking of velociraptors...there are a lot of folks with tattoos of them, but I wonder how they feel about the whole “they have feathers” thing.

Will they add feathers, or just leave them as-is?

12:33 PM Mr. Amethyst

Most will leave them, some will add.

12:33 PM Mr. Gray

Nekkid Velociraptors!

Mr. Brown

I wonder if its possible to tattoo Real Tree camo all over your body, and be able to blend into the woods.

12:51 PM Mr. Blue

If you use forest camo, what happens when you go to the desert?

Or vice-versa?

12:52 PM Mr. Brown

LOL

12:52 PM Mr. Blue

Also, if you did it you'd have to be naked to be camouflaged.

Day 256 - "As Long As You're Coming We Also Have A Coupon For A Free 6-Pack Of Beer", An IQ Way Down Under, "Busted" Out Laughing, Obsession Compulsive Derp-order, "Well When We Get To 47 Let Me Know, I'm Gonna Throw Up", The Natural 1-ders Of The World, and "But When You Talk About Destruction, Mr. Blue Says You Can Count Me Out."

10:54 AM Mr. Gray

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/borrowing/creditcards/10231556/Man-who-created-own-credit-card-sues-bank-for-not-sticking-to-terms.html

LOL

10:59 AM Mr. Blue

Nice

11:04 AM Mr. Gray

Yeah, I cant believe they didn’t check to see if he changed it, but I guess I never thought about the fact that most of that stuff is automated.

11:20 AM Mr. Silver

I believe that the credit community is scrambling at this very moment to change their SOP on such things.

That's a much better scam than the "We have a 50% off pizza coupon here" thing some guys were pulling in State College.

11:22 AM Mr. Silver

I think Mr. Pig Iron was one of them; he told me about it, at least.

The restaurant would just deliver the pizza, and the delivery guy would never check/collect the coupon, which never existed in the first place. And they did it over and over.

11:23 AM Mr. Gray

Hehe.

11:25 AM Mr. Silver

"Why yes, the family did move here from the US, why?" 

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/08/08/australian-far-right-candidate-is-even-dumber-than-a-tea-partier/

11:29 AM Mr. Gray

Wow...

11:40 AM Mr. Amethyst

I'm not sure how I got to this

http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110217022840/uncyclopedia/images/2/2c/JamieWalrus.jpg

11:47 AM Mr. Silver

"Myth Confirmed"

11:47 AM Mr. Amethyst

Right

11:49 AM Mr. Silver

Moronic clients need to stop overtalking us.

This VPN ticket could have been closed over 5 minutes ago, and we've only been on it 7 minutes.

God, he's awful.

12:02 PM Mr. Silver

A-holes like this seem guaranteed to magically F up stuff

12:06 PM Mr. Silver

"Actually this sort of error never happens to anyone, but Satan likes me today."

12:13 PM Mr. Silver

29 minutes for a runtime error.

What a moron.

I think his description of every detail is an adaption strategy by a really stupid man to keep himself organized.

12:15 PM Mr. Amethyst

Agreed.

12:15 PM Mr. Silver

I'm just waiting for him to tell me "I'm going to walk across the room.  I’m going to move my left foot forward and lean, and swing my right forward..."

12:16 PM Mr. Blue

Heheh

"I’m inhaling...and now I will exhale.."

12:16 PM Mr. Silver

"The walking is working fine...I'm swinging the left forward again.  I appear to be making progress across the room."

12:17 PM Mr. Amethyst

LOL

12:17 PM Mr. Silver

God...his brother just got on the line.

12:17 PM Mr. Amethyst

Oh boy.

12:17 PM Mr. Silver

"Well, that is a completely unrelated issue. I'll need to transfer you to-"

"Anyway, what happens is..."

"I'll need to tr-"

"So next we tried..."

“Sir, I need to tra-”

“But then we...”

It turns out this one wasn't doing the net stuff because he's not as good at it as his brother was.

12:21 PM Mr. Gray

“Is there anyone there who is good at actually listening, sir?”

12:21 PM Mr. Amethyst

“What?”

12:21 PM Mr. Silver

"Do you two have a quiet brother?"

1:12 PM Mr. Blue

http://now.msn.com/intempo-building-47-stories-skyscraper-would-really-be-nice-if-it-had-an-elevator

1:13 PM Mr. Silver

Malcolm and I were giggling over that one yesterday.

1:13 PM Mr. Blue

I guess with tens of thousands of skyscrapers going up every year, it was bound to happen.

But I'd expect it in Calcutta or something, not Spain.

1:18 PM Mr. Blue

There are probably some places where elevators are a luxury, even in skyscrapers.

1:45 PM Mr. Silver

That doesn't seem likely.

If you have the scratch to build a skyscraper, you can put in a lift.

Perhaps the hotel in North Korea?

Does anyone even stay there?

1:46 PM Mr. Blue

Nah.  I think only the first few floors are actually safe for occupancy anyway.

It was built with crappy concrete, so I guess the rest of it is off kilter, floors and walls are uneven, etc.

1:50 PM Mr. Blue

I would think a dump like Lagos probably has lots of crappy skyscrapers with no lifts.

Companies that want to build up, but don't care how their workers get to their desks.

Maybe not 40+ stories...but 15-20.

1:50 PM Mr. Amethyst

Why are we calling them lifts?

Are we in the UK now?

1:50 PM Mr. Silver

They lift things.

1:51 PM Mr. Blue

Oy!  Wuss all this then?

1:51 PM Mr. Silver

Flat...I don't get flat.

1:52 PM Mr. Blue

Me either.

1:52 PM Mr. Silver

"Wanna come up to me cubes?"

3:07 PM Mr. Silver

Day needs to end...

3:07 PM Mr. Gray

Agreed.

I just want to get this over with, go home, and chuck dice.

3:07 PM Mr. Amethyst

Craps?

3:08 PM Mr. Gray

Well, they tend to say "crap" a lot during the course of the evening...but no: D&D

3:16 PM Mr. Silver

That's it!

Out team name!

"The Natural 1-ders"!

3:16 PM Mr. Silver

@ Mr. Amethyst – We had a set of d20 die rolls last Friday that came out 1,2,1,1,1.

3:17 PM Mr. Amethyst

WOW! HAHAHAH!

3:17 PM Mr. Amethyst

http://dailycaller.com/2013/08/07/drone-hunting-licenses-headed-for-the-ballot-in-tiny-colorado-town/

3:17 PM Mr. Gray

Wow...

"Phil Steel proposed the idea after seeing news reports of domestic spying by the National Security Agency."

Let me guess...on Fox News?

"Steel called drones an invasion of both privacy and of the town’s sovereign airspace."

The town doesn’t have SOVEREIGN airspace....the US Government does.

I swear...these people are trying to act like the Civil War never happened and don’t even realize it.

3:19 PM Mr. Silver

A town doesn't have sovereign anything.

They can have a corporate limit, I suppose.

3:20 PM Mr. Blue

They want *another* civil war, and will make up reasons to start one.

3:20 PM Mr. Gray

True

Though I DO think we need a serious government cleanup...and it may be the only way.

3:21 PM Mr. Silver

It would go about the same...the “North” in this case has all the stuff, might, wealth and brains, and the “South” has unreasonable propaganda victims with guns and ill-considered ideals who think it would go like a Call of Duty game.

3:22 PM Mr. Gray

Same lines, yeah.

It'll be divided more along Republican and Democrat lines though, I'd imagine.

The Far Right vs everyone to the Left of them.

3:23 PM Mr. Amethyst

^

3:24 PM Mr. Blue

What would be the end goals of such a war?

Gay marriage?

I ain't dying for that.

3:24 PM Mr. Amethyst

^

3:25 PM Mr. Gray

It'd be the people who want the states to control things vs the feds, like before.

3:25 PM Mr. Blue

Other people can fight over that.

3:25 PM Mr. Amethyst

Yeah, I'd prefer states have more control.

3:26 PM Mr. Gray

On one side you have the people who would get state control, outlaw gays, shove God down your throat, second-class women and minorities...all that fun Reb mess.

Versus the Feds and people like us, caught in the middle and likely fighting for the Feds just because the other side is run by ignorant nutjobs.

3:27 PM Mr. Blue

I’ll move.

3:27 PM Mr. Gray

So I agree Mr. Amethyst, but I also don't want the states-level control in the hands of the nutjobs. Catch-22. LOL

3:27 PM Mr. Amethyst

Exactly

There's good and bad to both sides. We need to fight for integrity rather than this nonsense.

("I do not think it means what you think it means" - Mr. Silver)

3:27 PM Mr. Gray

Integrity never has a place in disputes like the crap stewing in this pot.

3:28 PM Mr. Blue

My ancestors didn't survive to get me here by getting caught up in other peoples' wars.

3:30 PM Mr. Silver

Well....they survived a few though.

3:32 PM Mr. Blue

But they didn't fight.

3:32 PM Mr. Amethyst

You’re saying they were pacifists?

3:32 PM Mr. Blue

Yeah. I can't find anyone in my family tree that willingly fought in any wars. My geat uncle and great grandfather who were forced into the Wehrmacht, but they surrendered to French/American troops pretty quickly.

3:34 PM Mr. Silver

(Thak Uk Blu, 7000BC) "We have to fight the invaders or we'll all be enslaved?  What's it pay?  Food shelter and whips?  I'm in!"

3:36 PM Mr. Silver

(Gaivs Bloovs 200AD) "A cushy job on a horse in the back of the troops, then Imperial senate, a nice estate and easy living til I die?   Any chance I'd get attacked? Meh..."

3:36 PM Mr. Gray

LOL

3:38 PM Mr. Silver

(Heinrich von Blau 1913) "So I'm guaranteed to wait out the war in, like, Bulgaria, supervising farmers?  Do I have to wear the uniform?  Pass." 

3:39 PM Mr. Blue

LOL

3:39 PM Mr. Amethyst

LOL nice!

3:40 PM Mr. Gray

LOL

3:41 PM Mr. Silver

(Erik Blau 1939) "Hi, are you English?  Yeah, they gave me this gun and these clothes.  I don't like loud noises...want it?  Hands up?  Hey, whatever."

3:41 PM Mr. Blue

LOL

It sounds like that's how it went.

They were sent to the French line, and the whole platoon surrendered and they rode out the war as POWs.

3:42 PM Mr. Gray

LOL

3:42 PM Mr. Silver

With their battle cry "Wir beenden!"

3:43 PM Mr. Amethyst

"Show me your war face!"

"eehhhh"

3:43 PM Mr. Silver

(private) "Captain!  They're charging!  Well...walking. They...all have little white flags, sir."

"Might be a trick!"

"I'm not so sure...they're just throwing their helmets and rifles down and pointing at them."

3:45 PM Mr. Amethyst

LOL