Day 53 - And The Oscar For Most Pretentious Award-Bait Goes To..., A Smokin' Hot Ride, A Couple Little Details About Marilyn Monroe, Mr. Yellow Baked At 350 Degrees for 5 1/2 Hours, And License And Proof of Vows Please

Mr. Brown

Wow I just looked down and I have dirt all over my shorts

Wonder what I rubbed against

9:24 AM Mr. Red

Or who

9:26 AM Mr. Blue

My cup of water is leaking

9:26 AM Mr. Silver
Sounds like an Oscar-Bait film title.

9:27 AM Mr. Red

Hold it over Mr. Brown's shorts

9:27 AM Mr. Brown

lol

We need a little soap

9:28 AM Mr. Blue

"Thomas Johnson's Cup of Water," a film by Roman Polanski

9:28 AM Mr. Silver
Starring Hugh Grant as another awkward but charismatic Englishman.

9:28 AM Mr. Blue

And Julia Roberts as a mouthful of teeth

9:28 AM Mr. Red

Ouch

9:30 AM Mr. Silver

With Ewan McGregor and Jude Law as the conniving brothers with a secret.

9:34 AM Mr. Silver

Julia "That cup of water is leaking."

Hugh "Mm, yes..."

Julia "It's getting all over everything...you want me to get you another?"

Hugh "Rather not. You see…I…I made a promise to my mother. It sounds like a silly thing to be honest...but."

Jude "Now really, Thomas. Just let ME have the cup and stop being obstinate."

Ewan “Don't be ridiculous, Harold.  I should have it.”

Hugh "Frankly, I think you and Harold can both just go to Hell first, George. There, I've said it. The cup belongs here, with me."

Julia "Seriously guys, can I at least get you a paper towel or something? It's getting all over your shorts, Tom."

Brothers "NO!"

9:45 AM Mr. Silver

For some reason I'm seeing a drawn out fight between Don Rickles and Micky Rooney as Julie Robert's grandfathers.

I'd pay for an IMAX showing of that.

Soundtrack for the fight: Motorhead "The Game".

     (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_JF8oSxXtM - Mr. Silver)

9:47 AM Mr. Brown

“Grumpy Old Men: Getting Even Grumpier"

"The Bad News Grumpy Bears"

9:50 AM Mr. Blue

“Grumpy Old Men 3: Beyond the Grave”

9:51 AM Mr. Brown

“Grumpy Old Men 20: Annoying God”

“Odd Couple 5 : Aren’t These Guys in Grumpy Old Men?”

9:57 AM Mr. Silver
Now wait. This is heavily anglicized and an Oscar contender, so it'd be more like "Venerable Curmudgeons"

11:26 AM Mr. Blue

Different game? Dog movies?

“Apocalypse Bow-Wow”

     (100 dog puns later and on the other side – Mr. Silver)

Mr. Silver

Sigh...

11:57 AM Mr. Blue

?

11:57 AM Mr. Silver

Really? “Young Frankenpup”?

11:58 AM Mr. Blue

Uhm, not liking it?

The Oscar thing was too complex, for me

12:01 PM Mr. Silver

Writing the lines?

12:01 PM Mr. Blue

Yeah

I didn't have anything to add to yours

12:03 PM Mr. Silver

lol

Well, I've seen a lot of the pompous fluff that gets Oscar nominations

12:03 PM Mr. Blue

The King's Speech was pompous fluff, but still good

Pretty much everyone agreed, "This movie was made for the sole purpose to win a ton of Oscars, but it's still a good film."

12:11 PM Mr. Silver

Executive Producer - "Our task, people, is not about box office receipts, but about impressing critics and winning awards so that we can get box office bucks in the rush AFTERWARDS, and get gold stars on our resumes. So let's get busy and make some pompous fluff only 5% of film-goers will pick over fantasy, sci-fi, action, or comedy."

12:13 PM Mr. Blue

Basically

They want something they can hang their hat on 20 years later

Like F Murray Abraham or Marlee Maitlin

12:34 PM Mr. Silver

Let's be realistic...how many people are watching ANY of the pompous fluff Oscar-bait pieces that inevitably end up in the running, years later, even if they win?

12:36 PM Mr. Silver

How many rentals of "The English Patient" are there versus "Gladiator"? They both won best picture.

12:36 PM Mr. Blue

Yeah

or “Terms of Endearment” vs. “Ghostbusters”

12:42 PM Mr. Silver

Exactly

1:53 PM Mr. Blue

Christ! There enough Issue Tags?

1:55 PM Mr. Silver

You mean the "No Human Could Track a 10th Of This" list?

1:57 PM Mr. Silver

"Could you hold for another 5 minutes to allow me to scan our crap pile and Tag your ticket? If it's involved in any issues with comprehensible terms, that is."

Mr. Brown

Yeah sometimes it's impossible to understand these

2:00 PM Mr. Blue

37 Tags

"37!" ("Clerks")

2:00 PM Mr. Brown

How do you have 37?

I have 5

2:01 PM Mr. Blue

Just lucky I guess

2:05 PM Mr. Silver

There's more than one category Mr. Brown: Universal, User, and Service

2:05 PM Mr. Silver

Service is tremendous, User is merely huge, Universal has 4

I usually stay on Universal so my head doesn't explode

Mr. Brown

It was sooo hot in my car yesterday after work I could not breathe til I opened the window.

8:15 AM Mr. Red

I turned my AC on today so I can use my remote start and I won't have that issue

8:16 AM Mr. Brown

Well I figured putting the reflective window guard in would do nothing today, so I did not do it

8:17 AM Mr. Blue

It wasn't that the inside of my car was hot, but everything I touched was hot

8:17 AM Mr. Red

You get in and your steering wheel will be melted

8:17 AM Mr. Blue

Even when I tried to point the AC vent onto myself, the metal around the vent was too hot to touch

8:18 AM Mr. Red

My glasses immediately steamed up

8:19 AM Mr. Silver

(arriving late and trying to catch up)

Are we talking about "Christine"?

What is this death car of which you speak?

"This reddish skinned guy in a pinstriped suit gave me the car for free. I just had to sign some paper. I didn't read it."

8:20 AM Mr. Blue

Marilyn Monroe’s mole was fake

8:21 AM Mr. Silver

She wasn't blonde and had sets of fake nips too

8:26 AM Mr. Blue

Why did she have fake nips?

8:27 AM Mr. Brown

So they would stick out nice

8:27 AM Mr. Silver
yup
I remember a tale about a friend at her funeral viewing slipping a set in because she didn't look right without them

8:31 AM Mr. Blue

I’m content with my nipples

So at least there's always that

Mr. Blue

"I've been getting all kinds of pop ups and virus warnings lately. I think a terrorist has taken over my computer."

"7-21-11: Never Forget."

9:13 AM Mr. Silver

"Just remain calm, I'm sure it can be fixed. Remember the words of George W. Bush: “Umerica will never tolar-ate tear-er, tear-ism, or tear-ists.'"

Mr. Gray

Don’t know how you are going to survive in that garage today, Mr. Yellow

8:54 AM Mr. Yellow

I have fans, lots of fans

And Gatorade

Mr. Gray

My god its insanely hot out

12:48 PM Mr. Gray

I'll be surprised if Mr. Yellow doesn’t slow roast in that garage. Fans or no fans, it has to be a sauna

1:00 PM Mr. Silver

I think his 'away' indicator is because he's currently expiring on the floor

1:43 PM Mr. Yellow

I have 6 fans running, and propped the office door open and have a fan drawing in the air conditioned air from there. Helps a bit

2:27 PM Mr. Yellow

All this heat is making me sleepy

2:29 PM Mr. Silver

That's death setting in.

It's a similar similar thing to when you start to freeze to death

2:29 PM Mr. Green

Starts immediately after marriage... LOL

2:29 PM Mr. Yellow

Ahh! Thought so!

The exhaustion could be partly that Mrs. Yellow is looking for the marriage certificate she needs to get her drivers license with Yellow as her last name 10 minutes before having to rush out of the house, calling me in a panic asking me to remember where I put it a month ago.

“On the table” I say.

“Well it is not here now!!!!”

“No shit, Sherlock! It has been a month and we cleaned, duh!”

2:31 PM Mr. Silver
Man...Don’t get pulled over without that
"Is there a problem officer?"
"Marriage license please. Do you realize the sort of relationship you are involved in, sir?"
"Uh...I...don't have my marriage license...not here."
"Mmm hmmm. I'd like you to please step out of the car sir..."

Day 52 - The "I Forgot" Defense, Mistur Brwne, Or Maybe It's A Giant Bow Tie - Bow Ties Are Cool, Blink And You'll Miss Half A Brain, Suspect Swimming Situations, And Suspicious Shopping

              (More talk of dashed girlfriend prospects – Mr. Silver)

Mr. Silver

Not posting all that BTW...

11:46 AM Mr. Blue

Heh, sorry

11:46 AM Mr. Silver

Eh

You need to move on though.

11:47 AM Mr. Blue

K

11:47 AM Mr. Silver

I mean in the romance dept, not the subject.

I can't stop you talking about your stalking habits.

(notes to post that)

11:48 AM Mr. Blue

heheh

Mr. Silver
"And when exactly did you forget you had them, Mr. Meoli?" "Man! Like, within 10 minutes of eating one, dude..."
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2011/07/16/sf-jury-acquits-man-who-forgot-mushrooms-where-in-his-backpack/

8:04 AM Mr. Blue

I don't remember running that stop light either, or pushing that guy into oncoming traffic.

8:04 AM Mr. Silver
Yup. Lotta "I forgot" defenses coming.

8:04 AM Mr. Brown

“Every time I eat one of these I forget I have them.”

8:05 AM Mr. Silver
Might become as popular as the insanity plea way back in the day.

8:05 AM Mr. Blue

I’m sure most people arrested for DUI don't remember a damn thing

8:07 AM Mr. Silver

"Aw man...that...that was like, MONTHS ago in...uh...like July." "It is July, sir." "Huh?"

      (Mr. Brown not edited in this section, enjoy. – Mr. Silver)

8:08 AM Mr. Brown

i saw somthing on TV this morning about the egyption drunken party '

8:09 AM Mr. Blue

Is that why they walked funny?

8:09 AM Mr. Brown

I guess they drank beer more than water some people say

8:09 AM Mr. Silver

Certainly safer, and that notion remains to this day in some places.

8:09 AM Mr. Blue

Beer beer? Or just fermented stuff?

8:11 AM Mr. Brown

I would drink beer everyday

8:11 AM Mr. Red

Sounds like a plan right now

8:11 AM Mr. Pink

You would get fat

8:11 AM Mr. Red

Too late for me

8:11 AM Mr. Pink

haha

8:11 AM Mr. Brown

Not if you are constatly working like the egyptions did

8:12 AM Mr. Silver
(Throttles Mr. Brown) Egyptians!!!

8:14 AM Mr. Red

Translation – Mr. Silver's tired of editing you!

8:13 AM Mr. Brown

tians

ok

not tions

8:13 AM Mr. Silver

“egyptions” would be...like...free electrons extracted from Nile river water.

Mr. Silver
"Institute of Space Physics confirms largest known visual matrixing effect."
http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2011/07/milky-way-ribbon/
Note the face of Astro Boy prominently featured in the middle.
It's right above the tremendous Galactic "Corn Pops" cereal nugget.

8:23 AM Mr. Blue

Buzz Lightyear is our god

8:25 AM Mr. Red

To infinity and beyond

For Mr. Brown that is inphinety

8:25 AM Mr. Silver

"To the left and right of the bow-shaped loops, if you look closely you can see the laces descending, showing that our galaxy has learned to properly tie its shoes."

8:26 AM Mr. Blue

Good thing Nazis aren't around today, because some galaxies look like crude swastikas

The pinwheel kind

"SEE! We made them, too!"

8:27 AM Mr. Silver

With help from aliens.

That discovery is merely proof that we live in galaxy #8.

8:28 AM Mr. Blue

Pretty good number, actually. A nice round number

8:28 AM Mr. Brown

Maybe the aliens gave them the symbol

I like 8, 7 is my favorite

8:29 AM Mr. Blue

I’d hate to be the moderately intelligent gastropods living in galaxy #2,803,519

9:17 AM Mr. Pink

What's the maximum FPS a human eye can see?

9:18 AM Mr. Brown

That I would have to look up

9:18 AM Mr. Pink

I think it's maybe 60

9:20 AM Mr. Brown

I guess they have not tested the FPS enough to find one that we cannot see a difference in.

9:21 AM Mr. Pink

Google cant answer the question

9:22 AM Mr. Brown

Some people can see up to the 120fps

9:22 AM Mr. Pink

It looks like it's actually not as clear at 120 from what people wrote here; it blurs

9:23 AM Mr. Silver
Tech versus biology
Remember your retina is made up of lots of little receptors all firing at random when they get enough energy, and then it's transported and assembled in a flow.
It's not flashing completed pictures

9:27 AM Mr. Pink

But I want a benchmark on how fast these receptors can handle images, lol

9:29 AM Mr. Silver
Might be a matter of ocular nervous system and brain health then.
I've read there's a small percentage of women that have a 4th color receptor and see colors in much richer array than everyone else.
You hand them "the same red" to everyone else and they can always tell the two apart; that sort of thing.
I can't imagine them handling the same frame rate as a regular person though...overload.
33.3% more color info to process

9:33 AM Mr. Brown

Color blind people have issues with that reception too

So they see less colors

9:35 AM Mr. Silver

Interpret as fewer colors, more like. The receptors that see green and red interpreting the wavelengths as the same color, for that type, for example.

9:36 AM Mr. Pink

So if a person only had 1 eye you think it would be able to handle more

Is it the avenue limiting it, or the brain?

9:36 AM Mr. Brown

The brain could adapt

There are people with half a brain that can still function the same as a whole brained person

9:38 AM Mr. Silver
Some of our co-workers, for instance.

9:41 AM Mr. Pink

haha

11:03 AM Mr. Brown

It is very hot outside today

I THINK IT’S THE HEAT

11:05 AM Mr. Red

Go swimming, people!

11:12 AM Mr. Pink

I wish I had a swimming pool

Mr. Blue, you got a pool at your Hollywood Hills house?

11:16 AM Mr. Blue

No. There's a couple ponds nearby.

11:18 AM Mr. Red

Mr. Pink, you need to buy the house with a poll then we can come party at your place ALL the time

11:20 AM Mr. Brown

Poll

Flubbed the second o like I would

11:25 AM Mr. Red

lol - I see that now oops - sorry Mr. Silver

11:47 AM Mr. Blue

Get a house with a pole

A stripper pole

11:47 AM Mr. Silver
It's OK Mr. Red, I didn't notice.  I was thinking about how picking up leeches swimming in Mr. Blue's ponds would be OK compared to some of my workload today.

12:28 PM Mr. Pink

Do you guys ever watch vbs.tv?

or the vices guide to everything?

12:30 PM Mr. Blue

Yeah

          (snip)

There was one where they went to some place in Africa.

A coastal city where there was just filth everywhere

Like people were BMing on the beach. You couldn't walk on the beach because there was so much human excrement

12:45 PM Mr. Silver
"BM-ing on the Beach" was the last and least successful of the Frankie and Annette beach party films.

12:45 PM Mr. Blue

...but has garnered a cult following

12:46 PM Mr. Silver

Yes.  A lot of midnight showings in small German and Japanese theaters.

12:47 PM Mr. Blue

Ah, Germans too?

12:48 PM Mr. Silver

That's the rumor I've heard.

1:15 PM Mr. Pink

I read yesterday that Casey Anthony only Googled chloroform 1 time, not 86 like originally said. But 1 is still pretty bad when your child disappears,

1:18 PM Mr. Silver

Which, of course, pops up the memory of the smartly-dressed woman coming through my checkout, right before Halloween, during my time as a clerk at the supermarket. She was purchasing a package of straight-razor blades, can of Draino, and a bag of apples.

She put them down on the belt, contemplated them a moment, and said "This looks really bad, doesn't it."

Me - "Yup"

1:25 PM Mr. Yellow

I once has a clerk say something about my purchases. Deck of cards, bottle of syrup, bottle of rum, candles, and a box of condoms. "Looks like a fun night planned!"

Day 51 - Poor Research Patched By Fine Strategy, Who Is Blister Mue?, But Now It Looks Like A Larger Rock, And Furry Neighbors And Other Misidentifications

    (Regarding the Al Qadim game I'm running – Mr. Silver)

Mr. Silver
So you are past “The City of the Singing Sand” and off to “The City of Silver” next
Should be a bit more...active…

9:26 AM Mr. Gray

Oh that will be fun LOL

9:26 AM Mr. Silver
Kinda funny.
There's been a few occasions now where the team has run across people who "know" things but then you skip over questions like "What's it like there?"
"The Thimble is in The City of Silver, which is located here."
“Cool"
"... … ... Any questions?"
"Nope"

9:35 AM Mr. Gray

LOL

Yeah, we're screwed

9:40 AM Mr. Silver
Well, you have the main rule I suppose.
(snicker)

9:40 AM Mr. Gray

Make Brad go first?

9:40 AM Mr. Silver
No: “Don’t touch anything.” Though with your idea, you now have the main rule plus a fine strategy

10:01 AM Mr. Green

Why are we sending him in first?

10:02 AM Mr. Silver
Improves both your survival durations by 1 body, I think is what he's thinking

10:24 AM Mr. Gray

Yep

11:48 AM Mr. Blue

Took the link to the blog off of Facebook, since the people we're discussing, no matter how scrubbed, are on my friends list and may click

11:50 AM Mr. Silver
nod
11:53 AM Mr. Silver
On the other hand, if you didn't tell them you were who you are...
The people I told I was doing it picked my parts out with ease, but I told them it was my blog
Big "clue" there
12:11 PM Mr. Silver
You need a code name
Like “Blister Mue”
“Mr. Blue” shoulda done for you well enough...ah well..."Loose lips, ships shlips"
(I wonder how long I've been intentionally botching that saying...feels like its from way back in the early grades)

12:13 PM Mr. Blue

If any 'crush' of mine is checking my info and clicking the links and reading the blog in depth then I guess I'm in pretty good shape

12:30 PM Mr. Silver
Any stalker you have has already printed out your sections and sleeps with them scattered in her bed

12:30 PM Mr. Blue

That’d be sweet

12:50 PM Mr. Silver
The cops will catch her some night stuck in your bushes with some tin snips and a jar of rubbing alcohol, yelling that she's Mrs. Blue.

12:50 PM Mr. Blue

heheh

12:51 PM Mr. Silver
Ah...puppy love

12:51 PM Mr. Blue

I’d hate to meet the girl that stalks me

3:21 PM Mr. Silver
Some mix of Lady Gaga and King Kong?

3:21 PM Mr. Blue

Jesus

3:29 PM Mr. Silver
Stalked by Jesus?       
Hmmm...Good t-shirt   




8:04 AM Mr. Silver
http://www.physorg.com/news/2011-07-dawn-spacecraft-close-up-image-asteroid.html
"We are beginning the study of arguably the oldest extant primordial surface in the solar system," said Dawn principal investigator
"Older than Nancy Reagan"  

8:05 AM Mr. Brown

This is a big day.

8:06 AM Mr. Blue

Looks identical to any CGI asteroids Hollywood comes up with.

8:07 AM Mr. Silver
"We've discovered it's very similar to a large rock."

8:17 AM Mr. Brown

"Wow its also gray"

"It has no atmosphere"

"It just floats around up there"

"And if we look closer, it has a McDonalds on it "

8:53 AM Mr. Blue

http://www.thebostonchannel.com/r/28584696/detail.html

Mutilating a dead whale is a federal crime?

There goes my weekend plans

8:54 AM Mr. Silver
"There once was a humpback from Nantucket...
"Who's tail was so long he could...

10:36 AM Mr. Blue

http://www.ghosttowns.com/states/mt/castlecity.html I've been to this ghost town in Montana

10:40 AM Mr. Pink

Looks pretty cool there

Those buildings look in pretty good shape

11:06 AM Mr. Silver
"The most important thing that I discovered is that Castle is on Private land."
Translation: "I got yelled at."

11:06 AM Mr. Pink

haha

11:06 AM Mr. Blue

We did too

Supposed to check with the property owner before going on

11:27 AM Mr. Silver
"I can fix that."
"What's THAT supposed to mean?"

12:51 PM Mr. Brown

Bolderdash

12:52 PM Mr. Silver
Like Boulderdash?
or Balderdash?

12:53 PM Mr. Pink

Bolderdash is on Urban Dictionary, lol

I think Mr. Brown really meant bolderdash

12:53 PM Mr. Silver
I'm tellin'
It's all over Brownie-Boy

12:55 PM Mr. Brown

Balderdash.  My neighbor knocked on my door last night at about 9:30pm to tell me she saw a big bear run through my yard as she was walking through my yard to go home.

I looked for this bear but couldn't find it.

12:56 PM Mr. Blue

Maybe she was referring to herself.

12:57 PM Mr. Silver
Was she starkers and a bit tubby?
Perhaps you are misspelling "Bare".

12:57 PM Mr. Pink

What are those guys called that dress up like animals?

Furries or something

12:58 PM Mr. Silver
Furries

12:58 PM Mr. Pink

Ya, lol, maybe it was just a furry peeking in your window Mr. Brown

12:58 PM Mr. Brown

Or Bigfoot

Mistaken for a bear

Because that happens all the time.

People see a Bigfoot and think its a bear.

12:59 PM Mr. Blue

I would say it's more the opposite

1:00 PM Mr. Brown

Of course its the opposite, but it would be funny the other way around.

1:00 PM Mr. Blue

If you're mistaking a bipedal primate for something as common as a bear, you are out to lunch

1:01 PM Mr. Silver
heh
Most bear sightings were Bigfoot
I like that

1:01 PM Mr. Blue

Most cloud sightings are UFOs

1:02 PM Mr. Silver
"Bears don't exist!  Hell, you'd see 'em all the time! There's no room to hide out there!"

2:40 PM Mr. Brown

I got a new OSD HDMI cablei

So I get to test that tonight on my TV for my black screen issues.

2:43 PM Mr. Pink

What black screen issues?

2:47 PM Mr. Silver
Too many black people on his screen?
Just change the channel from BET to, say, some hunting channel if that bugs you

2:48 PM Mr. Pink

lol

Day 50 - I Need More GOOD School Dreams, Harry Potter Needs 10 More Pages, Mr. Brown Needs $5 To Attain Godhood At The Ren Faire, The Gods Need Strippers, And Our Interesting Tastes In Men, Women, and Women Who Like Women

8:58 AM Mr. Silver

I ended the weekend feeling relaxed, and woke up this morning on a high from what is usually a "bad" dream. Wrote it up so I wouldn't forget it

It started out as the old "you're still in school" chestnut

But it was odd because I was so relaxed

It was a rare “beginning of the year” one.

But I knew where my locker was, and the combination.

Knew where my class was and how to get there and in plenty of time

Had no worries about the teacher or subjects.

The teacher passed out our last test from the previous year for review, and I'd done well and he'd written down good comments

Then he passed around a new test, and I looked at it and had no issues with the subject matter.

And I declared "I'm done. I actually graduated years ago and have just been coming back here, year after year, for "the fun"."

I stood up, grinning, and walked out with everyone looking on, confused. Out through the halls, same confusion, and out into the sunlight on the front steps.

I was smiling and thinking “I might write a book about all of this."

(The end)

I'm wondering if I'll ever have another school dream.

If I do I'll be able to get out easily...I never could before.

8:59 AM Mr. Brown

Mine always include Katzenjammer now

Like Katzenjammer is the school

But I’m always too old for school

But still there

9:04 AM Mr. Silver

Work dreams are usually easy now unless I'm totally exhausted. I spot them pretty quickly and tell whoever I'm working with to sod off and it kills the "story"

1:30 PM Mr. Yellow

So I downloaded a decent copy of Harry Potter movie 8 and watched it Friday night

2:34 PM Mr. Silver

Good then?

2:43 PM Mr. Yellow

It was good.

They did not expand on the ending. I was hoping it would cover what the book failed to, but no. I still have no idea what any of the main characters do for a living.

2:54 PM Mr. Silver

I'm sure you can find some kinky fan-fic for the post-novel stuff

3:06 PM Mr. Yellow

Minister of Magic position was open, as well as a ton of other ministry positions. Harry has some good friends in the aurors office so could be one of those. We know Harry is not teaching at Hogwarts.

And what happened to his Muggle family?

3:10 PM Mr. Silver

The Dursleys?  They were in a safe house. I'm betting they wiped them

3:14 PM Mr. Yellow

I am betting they lived and returned to their humble home at Kings Cross

I doubt they were wiped

And I would bet Hermione would get her parent's home and return their memories

But tell us! It would take, what, 10 pages more pages or so?

WTF?

3:17 PM Mr. Silver

Yeah. We missed the “train crashes into the station as they're leaving and everyone dies” scene

3:17 PM Mr. Yellow

That too

lol

8:04 AM Mr. Brown

Medieval fair was fun

Lots of cool things my wife would not let me buy

8:06 AM Mr. Brown

I saw a lot of pushed up and out boobs

It was awesome

8:09 AM Mr. Red

lol

8:10 AM Mr. Brown

There were a few people dressed up in outfits that had nothing to do with the medieval theme

8:10 AM Mr. Blue

Like what?

8:11 AM Mr. Brown

This one lady looked like a crazy Alice in Wonderland and she was black, with blond and brown pigtails.

There was also a very annoying satyr riding around on his rascal

8:12 AM Mr. Blue

A satyr on a rascal?

8:13 AM Mr. Silver

Those satyrs are kinky

8:14 AM Mr. Brown

I wanted to buy a kilt but was not allowed to look

8:15 AM Mr. Red

Was she afraid you may look better in a skirt than her?

8:15 AM Mr. Brown

I would have worn it to work. Nothing wrong with a good kilt

8:16 AM Mr. Red

*shudders*

8:16 AM Mr. Silver

If I owned one, I’d be in it now

8:16 AM Mr. Red

Tell your wife I said thanks for not letting you get one

8:16 AM Mr. Silver

heh

9:17 AM Mr. Brown

I would have bought a Thor's hammer necklace at the fair but it was 20 dollars

9:18 AM Mr. Blue

Thor drives a hard bargain

What exactly is your price range on a Thor’s hammer necklace?

9:19 AM Mr. Brown

More in the 10 to 15 dollar range

9:20 AM Mr. Silver

Thor - "God-like power can be yours, Mr. Brown!"

Brown - "How much?"

Thor - "What???"

Brown - "How much for the God-like thing-a-ma-jigger."

Thor - "You want to haggle price on near omnipotence!?"

Brown - "Yeah."

Thor - "Uh...gotta sawbuck?"

Brown – "Mmmm... Nah, too steep."

8:22 AM Mr. Silver

So...Taiwan has strippers for the dead.

I was reading it “for the article”, of course...

8:24 AM Mr. Silver

Actually I read it for the anthropology

There were some embedded videos but I only clicked on one and skipped around. Mostly strutting about and singing

8:25 AM Mr. Blue

Was the headline "That's Not Rigor Mortis!"?

8:25 AM Mr. Silver

heh

The reasons given were mixed, but it's a tradition to put on a show at funerals

The shows are for the lesser gods – important dead people- they still have their earthly desires

So you put on a burlesque show to gain approval for the deceased, or alternately to keep the gods and other deceased from hassling the noob as he tries to cross over

9:34 AM Mr. Apple

http://news.yahoo.com/colo-woman-accused-groping-tsa-agent-ariz-215702921.html

9:35 AM Mr. Red

But wait...a TSA agent is allowed to

9:35 AM Mr. Blue

It was just an ancient oriental sensual massage

9:40 AM Mr. Apple

So if a TSA agent is going through those scans does it to a TSA agent on duty, does that make it a felony as well?

9:40 AM Mr. Silver

I don't think the traveling agent is supposed to feel up the working agent

9:58 AM Mr. Blue

Who watches the TSA people?

If they pat down passengers, who pats down the TSA?

9:59 AM Mr. Brown

You know a TSA could easily plant something on somebody after they are past the metal detector

10:00 AM Mr. Pink

Like a samurai sword

10:00 AM Mr. Blue

Or a live infant

10:00 AM Mr. Pink

Or something like a rare tiger

10:01 AM Mr. Blue

Or magnets

10:01 AM Mr. Pink

Did you see that news story where that person tried to smuggle rare tigers or lions onto a plane?

10:01 AM Mr. Blue

No

10:01 AM Mr. Pink

They put em in a suitcase

10:05 AM Mr. Silver

"I'm sorry, I'm a widow and had heart surgery, I can't answer these questions."

"'Widow' is not an excuse for stupidity."

10:06 AM Mr. Blue

Nor is heart surgery, unless they went in through her skull

10:06 AM Mr. Blue

"How invasive was it?"

"The surgeon was up to his shoulder.."

10:07 AM Mr. Brown

“Oops went right through the other side; have to patch that up.”

“I guess I shouldn’t have left the chest saw on and set it on her head”

10:09 AM Mr. Blue

It's a new kind of anesthesia

Crack the skull and massage the frontal lobe until they don't feel pain anymore

12:56 PM Mr. Blue

I got some checkerboard duct tape the other day.. pretty sweet

Makes everything you use it on look awesome

As opposed to silver duct tape.. which makes everything you use it on look trashy

12:59 PM Mr. Pink

What exactly would you be duct taping that has the possibility of looking cool other than some ducts?

1:03 PM Mr. Blue

I used some to patch up my bumper on my car

And my mirror

Looks siiiiiiiiiiiick

1:04 PM Mr. Silver

Just put in a crash test dummy for a passenger and it'll start looking really classic

1:05 PM Mr. Pink

haha

1:05 PM Mr. Silver

There's all kinds of recommended patterns in here for checkerboard tape, Mr. Blue:

http://www.google.com/search?q=crash+test+tape&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi&biw=1070&bih=701#um=1&hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-US%3Aofficial&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=crash+

1:12 PM Mr. Blue

The minute your car gets dinged up, you gotta go with the crash-test look.

All passengers must wear matching orange jump suits

1:59 PM Mr. Blue

So a marine asked Betty White to some dance

So what odd-ball celebrity would you ask if given the chance?

I’d probably go extra, extra weird with like.. Gary Busey

2:00 PM Mr. Silver

You'd ask out Gary Busey?

2:00 PM Mr. Blue

Yes

I would want Gary Busey to be my date to a military ball

2:01 PM Mr. Silver

Helena Bonham Carter for me, if you're going oddball...but straight

2:02 PM Mr. Blue

If I’m sticking to straight and NOT weird.. Olivia Wilde

She. is. re. dic. u. lous.

You could put her in a potato sack and smear mayonnaise on her face and she'd still be hot

2:04 PM Mr. Silver

(Googles that description)

You're right

2:05 PM Mr. Blue

She doesn't take bad pictures ever, so we have that in common

(And on the other side - Mr. Silver)

11:36 AM Mr. Blue

I have a mild, but not optimistic, update about the girl I was interested in. But I feel like I don't wanna talk about it

And by not optimistic I mean dead, dead, dead in the water as I kind of suspected

11:40 AM Mr. Silver

You don't wanna talk about it yet announced it?

11:40 AM Mr. Blue

Yep

11:41 AM Mr. Silver

Well I don't wanna know about it, so what happened?

11:41 AM Mr. Blue

Just like Farley said in the “Mr. Belvedere Fan Club” skit

He was right

11:42 AM Mr. Silver

You see her making out with her girlfriend or something?

11:42 AM Mr. Blue

Nah, but it's confirmed

11:42 AM Mr. Silver

(Dubious)

11:43 AM Mr. Blue

The evidence was mounting

And I overheard her say the G word

11:44 AM Mr. Silver

Googolplex?

11:44 AM Mr. Blue

Girlfriend

2:36 PM Mr. Silver

So...time for your “B” stalking target

2:36 PM Mr. Blue

Who might that be?

2:38 PM Mr. Silver

No clue. How about her girlfriend?