Tuesday, April 7, 2015

334 - Batman Isn't Into Japs Or Girls, Santa Pees On Zombie Jesus, Recreating The Good Parts Of Gang Wars, and Evil German Cookies

12:07 PM Mr. Blue
The first Batman in film was pretty racist http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Batman_%28serial%29#Production
12:44 PM Mr. Silver
I saw some of that once.  Can't recall much.
12:46 PM Mr. Silver
Turned it into an anti-Japanese thing, huh?
Not like anyone was rushing to defend the feelings of the Japanese in '43.  Not much of a surprise.
As long as we're still on topic, I should just paste the sideline that started in here:
(I made a comment about "Rushin'" and Swarovski crystals being Austrian)
Mr. Blue
That was a gag in the 60s Batman movie:
"Riddle: what is yellow and is always in a hurry?"
"I got it!  Someone Russian is gonna slip on a banana peel and break their neck!"  "Precisely Robin. The only possible explanation."
11:57 AM Mr. Silver
Hehe
12:16 PM Mr. Silver
That show was so horrible for stuff like that.
Funny though.
I still love how they found the Joker's hideout once.
Mr. Blue
How's that?
12:22 PM Mr. Silver
(Batman) "Consider, Robin.  Here is a map of Mt. Gotham (produces this thing which happened to be on an easel in the batcave next to them) Here is the Novelty Shop (already on it) and here is the Bank (already on it).  I know you've been working hard on your Trigonometry, Robin.  Considering the (perfect triangle) peak of Mt. Gotham into the equation, where do your studies suggest the Joker's hideout is?"
12:28 PM Mr. Silver
(Robin considers) "If I draw lines to join the points...then vertically intersect the triangles...Holy Triangles Batman!  The hideout is inside at the base of Mt Gotham!"
"Correct, Robin!  Remember...keep up your math studies...blah blah blah.  To the BATMOBILE!"
Mr. Blue
Heheh... I guess that's "camp" but to me it just seems lazy.
Like, what is Robin, 12?
12:31 PM Mr. Silver
Hehehe. 
I hadn't seen an episode in a very long time.  One day I was churning channels with Silver Jr. and stopped on it. 
Julie Newmar's Catwoman was laying a trap for Batman. 
Mr. Silver
And when she had him, she was so overwhelmed with lust she basically offered to surrender her whole plan, give all the info he'd need and all the stuff stolen so far back if he...in a series of innuendos and provocative poses...boinked her right there. 
He got all nervous and irritable and evasive.
Me to self "My God he's gay.  LOOK at her!" 
12:53 PM Mr. Silver
It was both astonishing and severely disappointing.
"I think the censors had the hots for Catwoman, considering how this is going."
12:58 PM Mr. Blue
Julie Newmar was incredible in that. She's almost still half-decent now.
12:58 PM Mr. Silver
(angry censor) "Did you see the FILTH in this episode script?" 
(censor boss) "I'm looking forward to the episode...I greenlit every line she used except '$&%# me Batman'."
1:46 PM Mr. Blue
Jesus... There's an example. Look at the picture http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gil_Perkins
1:48 PM Mr. Silver
"A whole new wooorld..."
1:49 PM Mr. Blue
"My heart will go OOOO-oooon!"
2:13 PM Mr. Silver
"Bruce Wayne is tied up and forced to ride Blue Beard's bowsprit!  This week on Batman!"



Mr. Green
Heheh
8:08 AM Mr. Silver
Snerk.
The guy runs a spook house.  What did anyone expect?
8:15 AM Mr. Silver
8:38 AM Mr. Blue
There was a thing on 20/20 the other day about some house in Pittsburgh.
The guy used to put up crazy Christmas lights. One neighbor asked him to tone it down because they were blaring into their windows... so now he has baby Jesus with a knife in its head and signs that read all the neighbors names and problems (even makes fun of one guy's deceased wife)
8:48 AM Mr. Silver
Nice
Contact the Warhol Museum before it's destroyed.
8:50 AM Mr. Blue
Heh.
9:05 AM Mr. Silver
It's nice being able to go around the whole house like this.
Hehe...in the right spot, looking through the bushes, a sign says "Hot dogs cause butt cancer".
9:08 AM Mr. Blue
Hehehe



9:04 AM Mr. Amethyst
Thoughts?
(Original goofball article removed. It was about gangs being imported to western PA to kill cops and white people. Note: there was not a single incident – Mr. Silver)
9:10 AM Mr. Silver
Yeah, read that about the law enforcement threat.
9:10 AM Mr. Amethyst
That pisses me off.
9:10 AM Mr. Silver
I forgot about the "Caucasian targets" clause.
It has certainly been quiet for an anarchist race war so far, but we'll see.
9:12 AM Mr. Amethyst
Right, nothing out of the ordinary so far.
9:18 AM Mr. Blue
It seems unnecessary for a generalized threat. When isn't there a general threat against the police?
9:25 AM Mr. Silver
"a source of unknown reliability this month reported threats to kill law enforcement officials and Caucasian civilians"
Translation "Mrs. Smith of Squirrel Hill looked up the lyrics to her kid's incomprehensible gansta rap albums."
9:35 AM Mr. Blue
"The threat turned out to be an Ice Cube song from 1988."
9:36 AM Mr. Amethyst
LMAO
Ice T “Cop Killa”
“Body Count”
9:39 AM Mr. Silver
(Exasperated agent on phone) "Ma'am, we get calls like this at the FBI every day and... You have how much?  That was 'billion', not 'million'... I see.  Yes, we'll look into it right away." *click*
"You gave your real name to her, didn't you?"
"(sigh) Yeah..."
"Hehe. Sucker."
"She name-dropped 'Michelle'." 
"Like, Obama?" 
"That would be correct." 
"Nice!  Let's just alert all of western PA instead of Allegheny County...cover everything."
9:58 AM Mr. Silver
I wonder what constitutes a “credible threat” of this magnitude. 
I could have sworn I read one of these that said "gangs" were coming in from outside.
9:59 AM Mr. Amethyst
I would imagine some form of "I have people willing to do this" with confirmation.
10:00 AM Mr. Silver
When I hear “gangs”, I always either picture Mad Max stuff or West Side Story guys.
"Police are on the lookout for dusty highly customized vehicles driven by Australians in home made tire armor and with weird hairstyles or head dresses."
10:01 AM Mr. Amethyst
LOL
10:05 AM Mr. Silver
"Witnesses describe gang members driving aimlessly in groups with no apparent destination.  Gas station attendants are urged to offer them water and free fuel."
"Owners of firearms can often make members leave them alone in exchange for a few bullets or a shotgun round."
10:10 AM Mr. Silver
"Women are cautioned to avoid 'ripped' fashion clothing, undersized fur accessories, chains and "big" hairstyles at this time.  The suspects have no apparent interest in conservative styles."
There's a LARP group somewhere I saw that does Mad Max stuff.  It looks fun, honestly.
10:12 AM Mr. Silver
Wasteland Weekend
10:12 AM Mr. Blue
Mad Max cosplay would be cool.
10:12 AM Mr. Silver
Hehe...nice.
10:21 AM Mr. Silver
The SCA celebrates all the 'good parts' of our Middle Ages heritage...a time when people were un-educated, dirty, brutal, often hungry and diseased, and the average lifespan for the top ranks was about 43. 
Weekend Wasteland celebrates all the 'good parts' of our future post-apocalypse lifestyle...a time when people will be un-educated, dirty, brutal, often hungry and diseased, and the average lifespan for the top ranks will be about 43. 
10:22 AM Mr. Amethyst
So what are we celebrating?
10:22 AM Mr. Silver
The 'good parts' version of the early 21st century.
10:22 AM Mr. Amethyst
Oh great...



12:31 PM Mr. Blue
My aunt sent over some lebkuchen.
12:31 PM Mr. Silver
Same ones she’s had from 1290?
12:31 PM Mr. Blue
Same ingredients, probably.
Even down to the communion wafer.
12:48 PM Mr. Silver
“Guten tag! Willkommen bei "Kochen mit dem Leib Christi!" Heute werden wir sein, dass Lebkuchen. Sie werden eine Tasse Weihwasser, 1/4 Tasse Blut Christi und 5 Tassen Hostien haben."
12:50 PM Mr. Silver
So cooking with holy ingredients is OK over there?
12:51 PM Mr. Blue
"Mmmm! Es schmeckt wie Erlosung!"
Apparently, they were first made by monks anyway. 1296 or something.
12:52 PM Mr. Silver
"We're out of flour, Brother Aldus!"
"Man...what happened to it all?"
"Brother jorge thought the abbot told him to make 5000 holy wafers instead of 50."
"...bring me a mortar and pestle..."
12:55 PM Mr. Silver
Schmeckt wie Satanismus!
12:57 PM Mr. Blue
"Welcome to Nurnberg!  Home of cookies, toys, tinsel and the Nurnberg rallies!  (we apologize for the last one)"
12:58 PM Mr. Silver
Hehe
Says here the monks used the same ingredients as in communion wafers so the dough wouldn't stick.
1:01 PM Mr. Blue
Communion wafers always tasted like soggy Pringles to me.
1:02 PM Mr. Silver
Now they just don't seem evil enough to be tasty.
(looks up Devilsfood)
This is just cake?  (rolls eyes)
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