Wednesday, June 3, 2015

344 - "Guardians Of The Plausibility", Life Regrets Of The Shallow, A Worm Hole In Your Theory, Pong Parts In Our Hearts, and Red-Eye Would Be Much Better In Her Case.

Mr. Silver
"Guardians of the Galaxy"
I re-watched it.
I remember being irritated with a "can be impossible not improbable" writing violation but I couldn't remember what it was.
See it Ms. Rose?
(I know you did, Mr. Blue)
12:49 PM Ms. Rose
Oh yeah. Loved it.
12:50 PM Mr. Silver
K
So let's consider Nova Corp's net defense...
Rather cool rig.
But prone to catastrophic collapse like in the film?
Um...no...never...
12:31 PM Mr. Silver
It was of rather dubious usefulness in the first place except as a rescue tool, but it'd never blow up.
That irritated me.
12:52 PM Mr. Blue
I probably suspended my disbelief enough that I didn't even notice.
12:52 PM Mr. Silver
Oh sure, that was to be what they expected.
12:52 PM Mr. Blue
I recall all their ships (including the Look Around You guy) locking up and forming a net, but I don't remember what happened other than the big black ship eventually broke through.
12:53 PM Mr. Silver
They wanted a set of awesome effects is what happened.
Well, they made the big net thing to stop forward progress...OK.
They clearly can't shoot through it, because I sure as heck would be unloading on the invader...also fine.
It literally seems to be a net... If a ship is tumbling out of orbit...catch it. Block a path... Keep an ocean ship from sinking… Fine.
So they wrap the thing around the invading ship, and Ronin steps up to the window and does one of his thumpers from his hammer...OK.
I'll generously grant that the infinity stone might give it enough juice to crush the ones in front of him -- even if it’s supposed to only affect organics...OK
And I'll be nice and say that Ronin could somehow aim an effect that clearly radiates out in all directions.  It certainly causes no harm to Ronin's completely unshielded ship interior...OK.
And then...
The Nova Corp ships all blew up like a long string of firecrackers!!!
No
NO
NO!!!!!!
12:58 PM Mr. Blue
Oh, and the girl from Doctor Who was really good in it: Sort of a mix between the Borg queen in Star Trek and the one female cenobyte.
12:59 PM Mr. Silver
Yeah, I liked her.
I prefer her human, redheaded, in a TARDIS, with a Scot accent; but blue and cyborg is fine.
Back to the issue though. In reality, the best that thump was pulling off was disrupting a few of the Nova ships right in front of Ronin.
If it was going to fail in a cascade, they would have just turned the net off and saved 99.5% of the team.
1:02 PM Mr. Blue
Yeah.
1:02 PM Mr. Silver
Bah
Hum
Bug
1:03 PM Mr. Blue
An unnecessary loss of the fleet and life not doing that.
1:03 PM Mr. Silver
Most likely, though? It would have done nothing at all.
If they were holding together against a mass that size, pushing that hard...that thump was a gnat bite.
1:05 PM Mr. Blue
"A wizard did it"
1:15 PM Mr. Silver
Hehe
1:20 PM Mr. Blue
Frink: “In Episode BF12, you were battling barbarians while riding a winged Appaloosa, yet in the very next scene, my dear, you're clearly atop a winged Arabian! Please do explain it!”
Lucy Lawless: “Uh, yeah, well, whenever you notice something like that... a wizard did it.”
Frink: “I see, alright, yes. But in episode AG04-”
Lucy Lawless: “Wizard!”



1:21 PM Mr. Silver
So..."Family Feud" was on the TV in the breakroom.
New game!
Up to the stand come the bleach blonde with luxurious long curls. And the super-fit Caucasian man with skin made of leather and permed hair.
"Top 8 answers on the board. Name something you wish you'd done more...when you were younger."
BWEE-EE-EE!
(me, loudly) "Tan!"
But no...it was the bleach blonde who hit first...
"Party?"
DING!
(me) "Of course..."
But "party" was #2
1:22 PM Mr. Blue
I didn't party much, but I don't wish I had done more. I think I did the right amount.
1:22 PM Mr. Silver
"Top answer is still on the board so it's to you to steal...Name something you wish you'd done more...when you were younger."
(me, loudly) "Tan?"
"Exercise?"
(me) "Oh, yes..."
DING!!!
#8
(me) "Pfft! Exercise...This is AMERICA, sir...sit down."
1:23 PM Mr. Blue
I'm guessing probably "study" or something was #1?
1:24 PM Mr. Silver
Yes!



1:41 PM Mr. Silver
Our GUI is like 12 years old...is that the problem?"
"It's from 9/2012, Sue."
1:42 PM Ms. Rose
She was calculating the age in dog years.
1:50 PM Mr. Silver
"Sorry...Had some trouble with the calendar after the wormhole incident."
"I see...when was that?"
"3498 AD"
I believe it was on phys.org yesterday that I read a theory that the Milky Way is, perhaps, a wormhole.
"If so, we may be able to travel through it."
(grumbling) “...already bloody traveling through it if it’s a wormhole, ya goofs...”
1:52 PM Ms. Rose
Haha
2:00 PM Mr. Silver
2:03 PM Mr. Silver
"Physicists are now asking themselves: Where is the biggest hole in the galaxy? Suggestions range from the obvious (galactic central point) to the logical (Washington DC) to the theoretically intriguing (yo mama)."



2:46 PM Ms. Rose
2:46 PM Mr. Silver
I don't recognize the console offhand but I've played quite the number of cartridges in my day.
2:48 PM Ms. Rose
Was just an interesting article... Long.
2:50 PM Mr. Blue
Pong was and still is pretty sweet.
2:52 PM Mr. Silver
We (dad and I in the 70s) built a Pong
It came from a company called Heathkit
We had to solder all the crap together and hope we got it right.
They made all kinds of stuff. I think I helped put together our stereo too.
The electronic game choices out at the mall that far back were Pong and a trivia game.
Both suffering from severe screen burn.
"And we had to play Pong with sticks we carved ourselves! And the ball was a turtle shell! And we had to play it uphill! Both ways!"
"Kids today!"
2:55 PM Ms. Rose
My earliest game console memory was the fake woodgrain Pong box. Like all trapezoid shaped and cumbersome.
2:56 PM Mr. Silver
Nod, played one of those.




3:26 PM Mr. Silver
Nice picture...she looks like she'd be in a movie reciting nursery rhymes in a daze as she drags a couple butcher knives down the walls of a house.
3:26 PM Mr. Amethyst
Right?
That is creepy.
3:27 PM Mr. Silver
"Ja-ack....Ja-ack... Jack be nimble...Jack be quick... Ja-ack..."
3:37 PM Mr. Silver
"Ja-ack....Ja-ack... (starts stabbing at a bed pillow...down-filled, of course - gotta have that feather effect.)
JACK and JILL went UP the HILL to FETCH a PAIL of WATER!!! ... Jack? Ja-ack..."
(Guys hiding in closet, whispering) 
"WTF! Are you Jack?" 
"No...I thought you were!"
3:39 PM Mr. Amethyst
LOL

Sunday, May 31, 2015

343 - There Are Still 'Lost Probe' Posters Stapled To Rocks All Over Mars, Please Read "Hermione Granger & The Goddamn Patriarchy" Today!, Another Entry In The Annals Of Inexplicable Research Funding, "The Ladybird Book Of Completely Safe Experiments For Kids Who Aren't Utter Morons", and Better Versions Of Poor Films Are Available If One Is Left Alone For A Few Minutes

11:58 AM Mr. Silver
"Aliens Return Beagle-2 as Part of Invasion Scheme"
12:06 PM Mr. Blue
Regarding finding Beagle-2: why didn't the Mars Rover just jingle some keys?
After locating the long lost lander they gave it some treats.”
Come on folks!!
12:12 PM Mr. Blue
They found it gnawing on some petrified martian furniture!!”
I'll be at the Laugh Factory on Tuesday!
12:13 PM Mr. Silver
"NASA heard scratching at a back panel of the Mars Rover and realized that Beagle-2 was still out there."
"Poor thing looked so dejected when we let it in."
12:13 PM Mr. Blue
The entire northern hemisphere is covered in Beagle-2 droppings.



12:41 PM Mr. Silver
Rather enjoying this...I like the book/film title: http://www.buzzfeed.com/danieldalton/boss-witch#.scP5maqQNG
1:01 PM Mr. Brown
Mr. Silver, what did I just read?
LOL
1:08 PM Mr. Silver
Dunno...Only managed to get through 1/2 of it myself so far.
When you grow up in a culture that allows wizards to speak to witches that way, how are you supposed to know that it’s wrong? But do it again and I’ll cut you.”
1:17 PM Mr. Brown
Yeah! lol
Hermione is the actually the hero in the entire story.
1:22 PM Mr. Silver
You're part of the problem, Muggle.
1:31 PM Mr. Brown
Burn that bitch down!
1:34 PM Mr. Brown
What's that smell? Oh sorry, its patronis.



Mr. Silver
"Researchers from the 'University of Science and Stuff', 'University of Like, Science', and 'University of Sciency Things' Come to Stunning Environmental and Zoological Conclusion - Retain Funding Against All Odds"
11:16 AM Mr. Silver
"And were the teams drunk?" We asked.
"We're from Sydney, Glasgow and Lausanne...what do you think?"
11:17 AM Mr. Amethyst
SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILVER!!!!
11:18 AM Mr. Silver
Oui?
I swear Phys.org puts these up occasionally like an Onion segment.



Mr. Brown
Have some old school hurt-your-child experiments!
7:03 AM Mr. Silver
That's not exactly "boiling water" and I've done that experiment.
7:03 AM Mr. Brown
Stripping a battery.
Even with supervision in school, I managed to burn myself with wires off a battery.
LOL
7:04 AM Mr. Silver
Yup, been there.  The miniscule 1st or 2nd degree burn from a botch is as safe and educational as the original experiment...bonus points!
7:04 AM Mr. Brown
Hold the wire on this end with this finger, and the other end with that finger. See it's getting hot? OUCH!”
7:05 AM Mr. Silver
"It's clearly quite dangerous to shine a torch into your eye."
Apparently he forgets how dim an old flashlight was.
7:06 AM Mr. Brown
Right.
Today its a bad idea because its like the sun shining in your eyes.
7:06 AM Mr. Silver
The whittling one is complete BS
Cutting towards the face of someone else!”
Really? Where? I see no kid kneeling on the ground.
7:07 AM Mr. Brown
It's showing proper way to carve. The only dangerous part is the knife.
7:07 AM Mr. Silver
Lead based paint!
7:07 AM Mr. Brown
Hehe
7:08 AM Mr. Silver
Really? You can read the ingredients on that smudge?
7:08 AM Mr. Brown
I like the description of the magnifying glass one.
Here is a boy leaning over a fire with a magnifying glass!”
Ok, so clearly the person that wrote that isn't smart enough to realize the kid is making the fire with it.
7:17 AM Mr. Silver
The man's a dip. I'd let Silver Jr. try all of this...unsupervised for most of them.
7:20 AM Mr. Brown
I already showed Brown Jr. how to make fire with magnifying glass and he's 7.



7:20 AM Mr. Silver
"SW fans rejoice at latest Episode VII reveal!"
Mr. Yellow
Thank goodness they used none of his ideas.
8:04 AM Mr. Silver
Yup.
Mr. Green
Come on now... There wouldn't be Star Wars without George.
8:07 AM Mr. Silver
I'm not saying he didn't spark the whole thing, and I'm glad he did.
It's just that left to his own devices, he produced 3 weak prequels.
And as time has gone on, it's pretty clear he's gotten a lot of undue credit for collaborative work.
8:12 AM Mr. Silver
Oh...sour grapes tale...
Couple days back I catch a post about a fan recut of the Hobbit movies
Cut all 3 down to 4.5 hours and took out a ton of garbage.
There was a link to get it if you followed the directions.
Naturally, such things only stay up an hour or so at best before being caught and killed.
So I started scrambling
Mrs. Silver, meanwhile, decided to start nagging relentlessly that we had to Gooooo!!! Noooow!!! Gotta Go NOW to the Post Office! Gotta go NOW to the BANK! Running out of TIME! What are you DOOOOOING!"
So much so I couldn't follow the directions and gave up in frustration.
We get in the car...start heading out. PO is on the way to the chiropractor, which is one of the quests.
"Have you got the stuff for the post office?"
"Hmm?"
"The post office? You know: Had to go before it closed? NOW?"
"Oh, I forgot it's MLK Day. The PO and bank are closed."
"(You...bitch...) Ah."
Of course, all the Hobbit links were dead by the time we got back.
8:32 AM Mr. Silver
That's the second time she's done that on a re-cut I wanted to see...the first, coincidentally to the conversation, was of Lucas's Episodes 1 through 3.
9:08 AM Mr. Yellow
Yes, he gave us three great movies. Then he gave us midiclorians and Jar Jar Binks.
9:13 AM Mr. Silver
"Master Qui Gon? You were telling Obi Wan that my (dubbed in voice) Force was powerful. What (dubbed in voice) is the Force?
"Yes, I performed tests and (dubbed in voice) the Force is strong in you, almost as strong as Master Yoda."
Friggin' midichlorians...what the hell was he thinking?
9:17 AM Mr. Yellow
They make no sense.
10:08 AM Mr. Silver
The only use of the word "midi-chlorian" itself (there's none of "midichlorian") in this book is (page 353, right at the end) an excerpt from a recording Lucas made, in July/August 1977, to elaborate on backstories for the (sequel) novelisation, comic books, and merchandising:
It is said certain creatures are born with a higher awareness of the Force than humans. Their brains are different; they have more midi-chlorians in their cells.
This is the quote that's fairly universally used as proof that midi-chlorians were an idea way back in 1977. The book is apparently constructed from various LucasFilm archive material, rather than new interviews, so it seems reasonable to assume that the author had access to the actual recordings from 1977.
10:11 AM Mr. Silver
I suppose he just mangled the heck out of "mitochondria".