10:14 AM Mr. Brown
lol
10:30 AM Mr. Brown
10:40 AM Mr. Silver
So how likely is a phone getting shot by a sniper to be an issue?
10:41 AM Mr. Brown
Yeah, I know.
lol
10:42 AM Mr. Gray
Quick...Stop that call!!
10:50 AM Mr. Silver
You can't legally have brass knuckles around here, can you?
"But it's a phone, officer."
"A phone I'm-a takin'...pass it over and turn around. Hands behind your head, please."
10:51 AM Mr. Blue
You can if you call it a paper weight or novelty item.
11:00 AM Mr. Silver
"This paperweight is fully automatic with 50 rounds of...uh...exchangeable microweight capsules in a swappable box."
11:01 AM Mr. Brown
They’re made out of shiny brass, for an attractive look.
11:53 AM Mr. Blue
1:24 PM Mr. Silver
Weird
The perfect bio-terror weapon for Peta
1:25 PM Mr. Blue
Yep.
1:25 PM Mr. Silver
Or perhaps the chicken farming industry.
1:25 PM Mr. Blue
Maybe it just gives you a super power that heightens your sensitivity to harmful chemicals and steroids
1:26 PM Mr. Silver
Heh
"Well, you see, if it was GOOD beef, you'd be fine."
1:28 PM Mr. Blue
I am allergic to everything but Kobe beef, and chicken that has been fed Kobe beef all its life.
1:31 PM Mr. Silver
That sounds like a pricey diet.
Kobe Beef Prices. 10oz cuts range from $900 to $1500
"Kobe Beef of Texas" at Sam's Club...hehe...what a scam.
1:33 PM Mr. Blue
Yeah.
Apparently you can't get Kobe beef in the US.
1:42 PM Mr. Silver
(Inspector) "And you give the massages here in Texas?"
(Rancher) "We got the 'Whumper' we thump 'em all over with every day."
(Inspector) "I see. And you feed them nothing but the special grains and Japanese beer?"
(Rancher) "Don't rightly know...is Coors Light from Japan?"
3:57 PM Mr. Silver
Don't want one
Don't want one
4:01 PM Mr. Silver
Now this one? Want. However, I'm waiting for the first hard-landing report with the pilot launching through the propeller as he's tossed from the seat.
4:02 PM Mr. Blue
“F Bike” is a bad name.
“Introducing the two-person Fuck Bike!”
4:03 PM Mr. Silver
“Go and take a flying fuck on the F Bike!”
"Look like a nerd who can fly with the new F-Bike!"
4:03 PM Mr. Blue
"Like bikes, but feel they're not cumbersome or inconvenient enough? Introducing the F-bike!"
4:03 PM Mr. Silver
"It has bike wheels and handlebars...no one knows why!"
4:03 PM Mr. Brown
I’m steering! I’m steering!
Oh shit, I’m not!
4:04 PM Mr. Blue
"It has all the speed AND turning radius of a bulldozer!"
4:05 PM Mr. Silver
The F Bike looks like one of those things from the year 190X that some Italian inventor would plunge to his death on from the Arc de Triomphe while being filmed.
(voiceover on B&W film) "Professor Fagiani dubbed it the ‘F-Bike’...and he was certainly F'd on his maiden flight!” (cartoon noises over film footage)"
4:05 PM Mr. Blue
Remember that guy that tested out a suit/parachute thing on the Eiffel Tower and died?
The death video is on YT in several different formats.
Pretty good quality too…no sound. He leaves a dent in the ground that looks to be about 10 inches deep.
4:06 PM Mr. Silver
Yep...I remember that parachute one.
4:08 PM Mr. Blue
It’s pretty funny, actually. It's hard to take a silent film like that, even basically a snuff film, as anything but comedy.
He falls so fast, and it was clear from the beginning that something bad is going to happen.
4:10 PM Mr. Silver
"Thanks to the heroic contributions of bold inventors like these, people more intelligent than them figured out airplanes, parachutes, helicopters and rockets."
(Boing! Wah wah wahhhhh. wwwhiZZZZ!!!)
4:18 PM Mr. Silver
One thing that really killed me about some of those early experiments: How could they NOT know?
Some just fall apart when moved. They were held together with spit and faith.
4:19 PM Mr. Blue
Just dummies.
How about the guy with the big boards taped to his arms that tried to fly like a bird?
4:20 PM Mr. Gray
Littler bodies then....smaller brains...like monkeys.
4:20 PM Mr. Silver
Hehe
That guy could barely move...he expected to flap or something?
4:20 PM Mr. Blue
Life wasn't that great back then, so dying in a hopeless flying experiment wasn't that bad of an option.
4:20 PM Mr. Gray
Well, there is that, plus opium was legal and socially acceptable, so I'm sure talking yourself or other people into things was easier.
4:21 PM Mr. Silver
His final attempt, feebly pancaking off the 3' high rock, was great.
(crowd) "Stay down!"
(other crowd) "No! Keep trying!"
4:21 PM Mr. Gray
"No really....you can do this. Just flap your arms really fast. It’s restrictive? Oh, that’s only because you’re on the ground. You'll see it’s easy once you jump off the cliff."
4:21 PM Mr. Blue
For starters, a bird's wings are huge compared to body size. Our arms wouldn't cut it. Secondly, the range of motion alone is way past what our shoulder joints could manage, not to mention the speed with which you'd have to flap your arms to get any kind of lift.
Birds aren't 100+ lbs. for a reason.
4:23 PM Mr. Gray
Because then they'd be called dinosaurs.
4:23 PM Mr. Silver
"I think I have it solved Fortescue! First I'm going to lose 150 pounds...then put 50 pounds of muscle mass on my arms and chest...then hollow out my bones. If I survive, I think I'll have this flight thing licked."
"Good show, old man."
4:24 PM Mr. Silver
"Everyone will be doing it in 3 years! I'll wager you thruppence!"
4:24 PM Mr. Gray
"I believe if I inject helium into my body under my skin, and flap really hard with this cape..."
(Everyone has certainly seen most if not all of these, and recognized references, but here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAfERVvGqco&feature=related Mr. Silver)
Mr. Blue
I got into a conversation with a candy maker in Ohio - Mcjak Candy. I looked them up and apparently they specialize in "gourmet" caffeinated lollipops.
Ratings are positive.
11:15 AM Mr. Gray
Caffeinated lollipops can’t be bad.
11:16 AM Mr. Brown
Give that to a kid.
Good luck!
11:16 AM Mr. Silver
It used to be “Marcus Jackman Gourmet Candies”, but after a few caffeinated lollypops it kept coming out as "MCJAK CANDY!!!".
11:17 AM Mr. Gray
I need to buy some for Halloween.
11:17 AM Mr. Brown
LOL
11:17 AM Mr. Gray
"Here...have two, kid!"
11:18 AM Mr. Brown
I’ll make sure not to come to your house with Brown Jr.
LOL
11:18 AM Mr. Gray
I may need to do that. It would be hysterical: Kids all wound up and driving their parents nuts. LOL
11:28 AM Mr. Brown
Make sure the lollipops have red dye in them too…make some kids hyper. Be a double whammy.
11:30 AM Mr. Silver
"LookIcanflymommyIcanflyIcanflymommyIcanfly!"
"Get off of that! You're only a pretend witch! Ge-...holy crap she's flying!"
Mix in some of the morphine ones they give to cancer patients to balance things out.
Mr. Silver
I can see the "Head-On" commercials for this.
(voiceover) "<bleep>-On! Apply directly to the <bleep>! "<bleep>-On! Apply directly to the <bleep>!"
With little black boxes covering the action.
1:44 PM Mr. Blue
Heheh
1:46 PM Mr. Blue
Replace it with Icy Hot.
(For those not familiar with one of the most annoying ad campaigns ever: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_SwD7RveNE Mr. Silver)
Mr. Yellow
I SO cannot wait to play again. I really need to work on the few people I know here to play at least once a month so I can get a bit more gaming in
2:12 PM Mr. Silver
"D&D? We play C&C here."
"C&C?"
"Sure! Coors & Cornholin'. Someone give Mr. Yellow a character sheet."
2:15 PM Mr. Yellow
LOL
There was that gaming group I was invited to that are all racist and homophobic.
2:19 PM Mr. Silver
Redneck roleplaying games.
2:21 PM Mr. Green
I'm racist and homophobic, but the difference is that I just hate all races equally...and I’m phobic of Homo sapiens because most suck... LOL.
Homo sapiens give me the hebie jebies...
