Mr. Silver's Instant Mess: 1/26/20

[8:54 AM] Mr. Blue:

Before the power went out on Friday i watched Star Wars episodes 4, 5 and 6 again... So the beginning of 6 where they're all trying to recover Han... was the whole thing planned with Leia and Luke and Lando or was it just a series of coincidences?

Like was Leia supposed to get found and captured? And how did Lando weasel his way in to Jabba's group?

"Lando, you're going to quit your job in Cloud City, move to Tatooine, establish trust with Jabba and over a long period of time become one of his henchmen. R2 and 3p0 you're going to become Jabba's property and probably be tortured or used for parts but just in case you're not here's my lightsaber. Leia you're going to go in and pretend to get Han out, unfreeze him, get captured and become Jabba's slave. Sometime after that I'll come in."

[9:09 AM]

This setup has long been considered an overly-elaborate, extremely risky, and quite stupid plan Luke came up with.

Being kind, I believe it was more than one gambit, all of which failed badly.

[9:10 AM] Mr. Blue:

yeah

[9:11 AM]

Lando got in...probably to scout.

His team was Leia and Chewy

[9:17 AM] Mr. Blue:

forgot about chewy

[9:19 AM]

The idea was Lando gets all the layout, Leia gets in with bait, and they have a Wookie that can carry Han out knowing full well he'll barely be able to move.

They got caught

[9:21 AM] Mr. Blue:

I guess it makes sense that they weren't getting him out as a slab of carbonite

[9:21 AM]

Luke and the Droids? Droids can walk away, honestly. They had restraining bolts but you can counter that and no one pays attention to droids anyway

So they walked in with a hidden light saber just in case.

Luke tried to dominate his way through gambling he could beat a hutt...and failed.

[9:21 AM] Mr. Blue:

I agree with you it was just a series of attempts but with backups... "Leia you go in and get him out.. and if you don't.. well, now you're on the inside"

I also wondered why Boba Fett was trying to stop them from escaping. What did he care, his job was done

Unless he was now a Jabba goon

which seems like something a bounty hunter wouldn't do

[9:30 AM]

He knew Jabba would grease his palm for every one he got

[9:32 AM] Mr. Blue:

sucks that Fett died. Did they bring him back to life in anything like books or animated stuff or is everything else about him from before he fell into the sarlac pit?

[9:34 AM]

He lived

And yes, he's in books

[9:24 AM] Mr. Blue:

the more i watch Return of the Jedi the more of a mess it is. still good, but a lot wrong with it.

The Ewoks aren't comparable to gungan, for starters. Yeah, gungans a little goofy but at least they're real.

How did the Ewoks manage to cut down a bunch of trees and then roll them up a hill and then tie them up with rope in the off chance that an AT-ST would be walking by?

OHH and why were the Ewoks so shocked when they saw C3P0 fly around when they've been seeing stormtroopers flying around their planet? Did they think stormtroopers were gods too?

Han's character throughout is borderline useless, but his dialogue and even Ford's delivery of that dialogue is really terrible

Like he's *purely* the comic relief in this and has lines that you'd expect out of something much older, like a 50s comedy.

All of Han's lines seem ripped out of some big book of script cliches.

I'm not sure why the emperor keeps *telling* Luke his plan, and that if he "gives into hate* he somehow moves to the dark side?

Why can't Luke just kill the emperor? That's what the entire resistance is trying to do anyway

Oh and Leia being Luke's sister is just completely unnecessary.

Has no bearing on anything and makes no sense. so they were both given up for adoption, and one becomes royalty and the other a farmer in a wasteland?

How didn't Vader "sense" it earlier?

And Hayden Christensen at the end. LOL what a mess. It looks so weird. He's not even looking in the same direction as Yoda and Kenobi. It looks like they tricked him into filming that scene or they used B-roll footage from his audition or behind-the-scenes or something

Still a good movie though

[9:50 AM]

Welcome to Star Wars fandom: Level 4

Beloved pulp space opera. Written to be exciting - not logical or even good.

Much like Flash Gordon serials...which is where it came from. (That and Dune)

You've “noticed”.

One of my favorite criticisms Carrie Fisher had from way back in filming New Hope was "People just don't talk this way, George"

[9:56 AM] Mr. Blue:

heh

Luke went from teen bumpkin to sage wizard between 5 & 6

4 - "I love to blast womp rats into hot soup back home."

6 - "Emperor you have failed, for i am a Jedi, as my father before me."

[9:57 AM]

People love "Empire Strikes Back", calling it the best. But the only “good” one from the original three was "New Hope".

Despite the silliness.

And after dozens of viewings I've picked up an awful lot of silliness

Most recently I noticed that everyone on Red Squadron was a bad fighter pilot and were being kept out.

They got their chance last because they were everyone that was left

Wedge: the brass hat's kid...don't get him killed. (Retro-written as a different Antilles than the hero captain who commanded Princes Leia's ship and owned R2 and 3PO).

Biggs: the crop duster who joined like two weeks ago after immediately dropping out of the Academy.

Luke: A farm boy who said he could fly, but stupidly refused to take a specialist droid...

All the other Numbered Reds were already dead by then, doing really stupid stuff.

Luke flew through an explosion, somehow got lost, and (my favorite) had to be told to “pick up your visual scanning”...an insult to the rookie telling him to “look out your window.” He chooses to make the run at “full throttle” - an insane speed R2 probably squelched – thinking going fast in a straight line would help against weapons that were faster and fired in straight lines.

Wedge nearly killed himself and Luke in a point-blank head-on attack. At the end – with his ONLY job to be a wall in the way – Luke tells him to leave because he'll be no help after a superficial blaster hit.

None of the three remembered to double their shields to the rear after the trench guns stopped.

You can see in the footage that Porkins was unaware of his roll angle and wasn't watching his altitude while trying to duck under the gunners. He wasn't hit...there was no one on him. He crashed into something with his starboard lower wing dipped towards the surface while flying rolled over.

The one Red kept trying to look back over his shoulder at the guy shooting at him through the window instead of evading the pursuer.

Stupid kids

Oh, and I agree... Luke striking down the Emperor in anger...not seeing how that was anything but psychology.

You can kill hundreds of anonymous opponents as long as you don't get mad.

(Palpatine) "Oh look...a baby Jedi. They're stupid like Vader. I'll make him think it's a bad idea to take a gimmie shot...whoever taught him probably loaded him up with the usual Jedi path-to-the-dark-side crap."

[10:42 AM] Mr. Blue:

Ahh yeah

[10:43 AM]

Didn't happen to Obi Wan vs Darth Maul

I loved that bit, actually

I was rather hoping it would come out in part of Anakin's training but it wasn't used.

Specifically that Obi Wan had some not-very-Jedi-like anger issues

[10:52 AM] Mr. Blue:

Gonna have to re-watch the prequels now

and actually watch episode 3 which i still haven't seen

[10:56 AM]

Oh yes? Wow

Quite the one to skip

Generally acknowledged as "the one that was least bad"

[10:57 AM] Mr. Blue:

2 sucked so bad i skipped 3

[11:11 AM]

There were some things I really think worked in the prequels despite the results...I'm not even sure they were not just accidents.

But if they were intentional they should have been explained.

Attack of the Clones, for instance, included the only real indicator of how freakin' good Anakin was with the Force

Being the only display of effortless and precision telekinetic control in all of the movies

Even Yoda sucks at it

One of those things that (if you noticed) was rather horrifying – Anakin cutting up fruit and floating the pieces around with his mind.

Not only could no one else do it, but no one else could even come close.

It was so extreme that he commented "Obi Wan would be furious if he knew I was doing this."

He was right...the Jedi were suppressing him.

Lucas just let it slide away, unexplained.

"We don't DO such things, padawan. Stick to pushing and dragging and picking stuff up please."

"But look, I can precisely control 16 objects now."

"Jedi do one object at a time unless its simple lifting in meditation exercises. Ok class, moving on..."

[11:40 AM] Mr. Blue:

I see

[12:13 PM]

I won't tell you about "Revenge of the Sith"...I'm sure you've heard enough before going in

[12:13 PM] Mr. Blue:

i think i know the gist of it

[12:14 PM]

http://leapica.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/Lea-Pica_5-Ways-How-To-Lose-Audience_Featured_Full.jpg

[12:30 PM] Mr. Blue:

Mark Hamill pitched that Boba Fett should be Luke & Leia's mom

[12:35 PM]

???

Boobsa Fett

Voice changer hip/chest slimmer trick, eh?

[12:38 PM] Mr. Blue:

https://news.avclub.com/mark-hamill-says-he-pitched-george-lucas-on-boba-fett-b-1830542150

He is pretty small, coulda been a woman under there

Lucas really tried to ruin A New Hope, even

Taylor refused to use the soft-focus lenses and gauze Lucas wanted after Fox executives complained about the look.

Taylor was the director of photography

Lucas requested for heavy filtration, which Taylor rejected, who said: "I thought the look of the film should be absolutely clean ... But George saw it differently ... I told him it wouldn't work, but he said that was the way he wanted to do the entire film, all diffused." 20th Century Fox executives backed Taylor's suggestion.[66]

[12:46 PM]

Star Wars was good because of other people, little doubt

So Lucas - in addition to all the other goofiness - wanted it to have the phosphorous fuzz of an old serial

[12:58 PM] Mr. Blue:

Yeah

[12:59 PM]

"The Star Wars”

"Episode IV"

"A New Hope"

"It is a period of civil war..

Filmed in Astigma-Vision!