Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Day 178 - They Burned Horseshoe To Escape, "Oh The Pain The Pain Of Lost In Space!", Archeologists Are Still Debating When The First Modern Human Tried For The Record, and Three Laudable Advancements In Space Research

Mr. Green
LOL.
I like the last line, stating that several other buggies fled the scene.
2:11 PM Mr. Silver
"The horse reportedly burst into flames after the crash."
I can see them slowly peeling out like “The Fast And The Furious” set on slow-mo.
2:12 PM Mr. Silver
"Officers jogged alongside the vehicles for a minute or so before the buggies slowly pulled away and eventually disappeared."



Mr. Silver
So, yesterday I set out on my recurring quest for one short piece of music from the "Lost In Space" TV show and finally found it.
In the process I found out that the episodes are on Hulu and made a go at watching ep1 and ep 2.
"Made a go" translating to "I struggled through one and a quarter episodes, broken up by 20 interruptions as my wife constantly interfered with pointless conversation and unnecessary tasks".
Something about explosions on the Jupiter 2 and a pair of headphones and an impatient glare didn't register with here as 'Go the F- away for 45 minutes'.
9:20 AM Mr. Brown
Danger Danger!
9:20 AM Mr. Silver
The show had good music...I didn't realize it was composed by John Williams.
I’m still angry about the movie.
9:22 AM Mr. Gray
John Williams did the Lost in Space TV Show music?
9:22 AM Mr. Brown
Didn’t they get unlost in the movie?
It’s been awhile since I watched it.
9:24 AM Mr. Blue
I saw it in theaters, and remember not liking it.
9:25 AM Mr. Gray
I liked parts of it...enough that if it’s on I'll watch it over most crap they show on TV.
"Eh...there is space stuff....time junk....a space ship and man eating aliens....it works."
9:27 AM Mr. Silver
I liked the movie, sans jiggle-monkey, up until partway through the crash landing. 
The time-mess in the second half was so "Star Trek: Next Generation Episode".
9:29 AM Mr. Gray
Yeah, agreed.
The space monkey bugged me simply because the girl in the movie played the voice of the girl in the Wild Thornberrys...and I seem to remember her having some hyper, irritating, non-speaking beastie in that too.
9:29 AM Mr. Silver
Dr. Smith was nasty enough as a human too, so the bug version was just goofy.
He's a real piece of work in the first couple TV episodes so far too.
9:30 AM Mr. Gray
Yeah...I SOOO would have spaced Dr. Smith from the TV show. LOL
9:30 AM Mr. Silver
Don wanted to.
9:30 AM Mr. Gray
"Doctor Smith? Oh, he was checking the air lock system.  He isn’t on the ship? Oh My...."
9:36 AM Mr. Silver
Lost In Space got better ratings every season than the original Star Trek ever did...hehe.
9:37 AM Mr. Gray
LOL
9:38 AM Mr. Silver
I'm sort of torn on whether the premise could be remade, or whether anyone would after the movie.
9:40 AM Mr. Blue
I’m not sure I could buy the idea of a family being lost in space.
Perhaps a family and a crew.
9:41 AM Mr. Silver
It was introduced well enough.  It was a one way proof of concept flight.
The US had sunk billions into it because Earth was (implied) screwed.
Don and the Robinson parents were debating whether to turn back or go on when circumstances screwed them over.
"We can make it even now." / "We're too damaged and the kids are going to die...go back."  / "Let's repair and the computer will decide."
That last choice was what finished them off.
Smith saw he had 3 minutes to turn off the robot, which he’d programmed to destroy everything, and Dr. Robinson had Don turn off the gravity to fix something.  Smith got stuck floating with nothing to kick off from and couldn't reach the robot.
Oops…
It was quite good, really…family laughing and having a good time upstairs, Smith flailing and watching the clock tick away downstairs.
9:46 AM Mr. Brown
If they did it again, there would have to be more of a crew.  People would have trouble believing now that just a family could run the whole ship.
9:47 AM Mr. Silver
It was government propaganda: America’s best family as brave trailblazers.  They were supposed to be asleep until they landed and the robot was to make all the judgments about the habitability of Alpha Centauri and report anyway.  It could have been sent with no people and still accomplished the mission objectives.
9:47 AM Mr. Blue
Perhaps a more realistic remake.
Instead of laser blaster guns and trek-like ships, make it more like “Moon” or “2001”.
9:48 AM Mr. Silver
It needs a hyperdrive to clinch it…they were only 8 hours into the flight.
I worked out a “Lost In Space” scheme for roleplaying gaming.
The idea was that they were on a colony ship instead...1000+ people in suspension for a cargo.
And the heroes (or family in a LIS reboot) are woken up when everything goes wrong.
They'd be in something more like the Nostromo from “Alien”.  A landable Jupiter 2 “truck” for planetary adventures, and up in space is the Jupiter 1 with the hyperdrive and human "cargo" that they are trying to find a place for. 
"We can only land that thing once...it better be a good place."
Insert weird planets, strange aliens, space encounters.
9:56 AM Mr. Gray
...and if someone dies in the game...you roll up your new character and play as another person taken out of storage to replace the dead guy.
9:56 AM Mr. Silver
Exactly.  That was the idea.
9:57 AM Mr. Gray
That would work for a movie/TV series too.  As actors leave the show you can replace them.
9:57 AM Mr. Silver
Yup...casualties would be possible on Lost In Space. 
And if you need a skilled character for a story they don't have, they could "swap", or have one out as a "temp" for as long as the support system can handle the stress of a spare breather/eater.
10:00 AM Mr. Brown
So basically you’re going with the “red shirt” theme.
lol
10:01 AM Mr. Silver
Nah
It's just if the story warrants it or someone has to go, you can get new people this way.
Remember, I was developing it for a roleplaying game. Major characters get killed by bad chance in those in a different and much less predictable fashion than in a TV show.
If you drop a team of humans 100 trillion miles away (in the wrong direction with no position information, I might add) from Earth, it's hard to explain where a new character came from.



Mr. Brown
10:12 AM Mr. Blue
So, did he win?
10:37 AM Mr. Silver
Eh...he's thousands of years behind other record attempts in progress.



Mr. Silver
She's a hottie!
11:52 AM Mr. Brown
Very shiny face.
lol
11:54 AM Mr. Silver
She needs some rouge and eye shadow to bring out her bone structure, yes.
Speaking of shiny, NASA has unveiled their world record attempt at the largest pan of Jiffy Pop.
12:06 PM Mr. Silver
I think Coppedge was mostly shortlisted for demotion and then termination for being an a-hole.
12:11 PM Mr. Silver
Coppedge's version - “I was discriminated against because I engaged my co-workers in conversations about intelligent design and handed out DVDs on the idea while at work.”
NASA's version - "Multiple counts of employees reporting harassment, and conspicuously promoting a second business during work hours."

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Day 177 - Astigmatism As A Beauty Aid, The US Navy Was Into Steampunk Before It Was Cool, We'd Like Everyone To Observe 180 Minutes Of Silence (12-3EST M-F) In Recognition Of The Troubles Plaguing Rush Limbaugh, Ultra-Slowball Pitching, and Not Even ABBA Could Have Saved Pepsi Blue

10:58 AM Mr. Blue
You know how in old movies they tended to film a woman differently?  Like, it's really closely zoomed-in, and the image is all blurred, and they look like they're glowing?  Then they cut to a man, and even from further away you can see individual wrinkles and blemishes on his face?
I noticed last night that Fox News does this with their female broadcasters.
11:14 AM Mr. Silver
Dreamy Cam
Yeah...they used to do that with Cybill Shepherd on Moonlighting to the degree of irritating.
11:24 AM Mr. Silver
One of the Daily Show correspondents used to do that as a gag in her segment
She was completely surrounded by flowers in super-heavy dream-vision every time the camera was on her.
11:38 AM Mr. Blue
Yeah, Beth Littleford.
I remember when she interviewed the lead singer of Gwar, in costume, surrounded by flowers.  And then they went to a golf course, and the dude's enormous rubber wings were sticking out of the golf cart as she drove him around.
11:41 AM Mr. Silver
LOL



12:20 PM Mr. Silver
Cool...something about the US Civil War I'm interested in:
12:23 PM Mr. Silver
The most advanced pieces of junk on water!  Zow!
12:31 PM Mr. Silver
On that note, there's this:
"Will be testable in 18 months if the Navy can get more Lego Technic parts."
"The most advanced partial pair of firefighting legs in the US robotic arsenal."
1:03 PM Mr. Blue
"So far in testing SAFFiR is excellent at carrying people out of burning buildings, but we can't seem to keep those people from being crushed to death."
By my calculations these droids will be at peak performance just when I’m going to be about the age when I don't want to do anything at all.



2:31 PM Mr. Silver
Wa wa waaaaaaahhhh
HAHAHA - “[The advertisers] are not canceling the business on our stations. They’re just saying they don’t want their spots to appear in my show. We don’t get any revenue from ‘em anyway. The whole effort is to dispirit you.”
Sure Rush...I'm sure that's it.
2:34 PM Mr. Blue
2 minutes of dead air is the most factual broadcasting Limbaugh's listeners have heard in decades.
2:34 PM Mr. Silver
One point to Mr. Blue.
2:35 PM Mr. Blue
I listened to his show a lot.
Usually because I felt nervous that I was missing something on the Right.
By listening to him, Hannity, or that guy/lady combo, it would just reinforce that, no, I’m not missing anything.  It's all a lot of nonsense.
2:37 PM Mr. Silver
Nod.  I'll put it on the car radio for a while sometimes, just to hear what they either believe or are just feeding to their sheep.
2:37 PM Mr. Blue
I think in Limbaugh and Hannity's cases, they're actually smart guys.  But I think they're playing characters.  It's a business.  They're not as dumb as they end up coming off.
2:38 PM Mr. Silver
I agree, actually.  It would never get anywhere but I'd considered calling Hannity to confront him with his obvious intelligence versus his complete irresponsibility, and ask if can't he find anything worthwhile to do.
2:38 PM Mr. Blue
If they went on air and said "Hey, let's hold our horses people...everyone calm down and think our problems through rationally", people would tune out.  That's not what the listeners want to hear



2:42 PM Mr. Blue
2:42 PM Mr. Silver
I know of it...did they get another drop recently?
2:42 PM Mr. Blue
I'm not sure.
2:42 PM Mr. Silver
(reads)
2:42 PM Mr. Blue
I remember reading a story in Mental Floss about the guy that started one of these.  He ended up dying before the first drop.
2:43 PM Mr. Silver
Oh yeah...2000.  I think that's more recent than the last reference I read.  hehe
2:50 PM Mr. Silver
One should be coming up due, based on this
2:50 PM Mr. Blue
I'm gonna make one of these.  I just need some pitch.



3:02 PM Mr. Silver
They should be careful messing with their formulas...they apparently haven't learned the lessons of New Coke, Coke II and Crystal Pepsi, I guess.
3:03 PM Mr. Blue
 “The ABA added that a person would need to drink massive amounts of cola to reach a risk level similar to the dosing in mice — 2,900 cans of cola every day for 70 years — upon which California based its decision.”
Americans you have your mission, now get to it.
3:04 PM Mr. Silver
"Meanwhile an ABBA tribute band's jingle 'Take A Chance, Pep-si' is a big hit."
3:04 PM Mr. Blue
How’s that Dr Pepper 10 doing?
3:05 PM Mr. Silver
Dr. Pepper 10 is not doing well in the Mr. Silver demographic.  I had to look it up.
3:05 PM Mr. Blue
New Dr. Pepper 10: It's not for women!*
*Dr. Pepper 10 causes massive cervical bleeding.
3:05 PM Mr. Gray
Its run needs to end with a zombie apocalypse.
LOL
3:10 PM Mr. Silver
"U.S. Surgeon General warns that Dr. Pepper 10 may cause harm to women on contact."
3:20 PM Mr. Silver
(sings) “If you change your mind, I’m the first in line, honey I’m still free, take a chance Pep-si!
I'm going to have ABBA earworms all weekend now.
3:20 PM Mr. Gray
I already do thanks to you!!
3:26 PM Mr. Silver
hehe
Swedish earworms are the most insidious.

Monday, March 12, 2012

Day 176 - "Does The Fugitive Have Any Distinguishing Features?", Insecurity In The Air, "Tax Reform Is HARD!", Rush Was Just Talking Dirty To 50% Of The World, Irrational Monetary Values, 'Accidents' Happen Mr.Yellow, "Honey Have You Seen F-35's Grades?", Some Serious Bread To Be Made In Presidential Pullets, A History Of Money That Is 1% Stretch and 99% Wind, Fierce O Fighting For Filet O Feh, and All Of This Could Have Been Avoided By Putting Up A Proper Playbill

Mr. Blue
"We attack the humans at dawn!"
11:23 AM Mr. Silver
"I'm looking for someone.  Have you seen a guy about 18" tall, white in front, black in back, with yellow cheeks?"
"Hmmm...maybe...got a picture?"
"Yeah...That one...23rd from the left, 80 back."
"Yeaaaah...I’ve seen that guy hanging around...he in trouble?"
He’s a dangerous revolutionary.”



12:00 PM Mr. Blue
Mr. Silver
"TSA body scanners make you look fat," says critic.
12:19 PM Mr. Brown
Well that is just wonderful.
12:19 PM Mr. Blue
When I took the train to DC I was really kind of shocked by the lack of security checks; there were none.
12:20 PM Mr. Brown
They are all hyped on the whole airplane thing.
12:20 PM Mr. Blue
I just don't see anyone trying to hijack a plane again.  The only reason 9/11 worked is because the people on the planes (except for flight 93) felt that they were going to land safely somewhere as hostages.
12:21 PM Mr. Blue
If a bunch of guys stand up on a plane waving box cutters now, they're going to get mobbed.
12:21 PM Mr. Silver
The last couple tries weren't hijacks at all; they were just suicide bombers...really untalented ones.
12:21 PM Mr. Blue
Right.  They were terrible plans.  Blowing up a plane isn't that efficient really.  If the plan is to kill lots of people, you'd be better off bringing a large bomb to a square or building with no security.
12:22 PM Mr. Silver
I'm still waiting for someone to dethrone The Underwear Bomber for most embarrassing moniker.
12:23 PM Mr. Silver
Airlines would save a ton of effort just by KO-ing everyone in the cabin.
12:23 PM Mr. Blue
Good idea.
The pilots should be able to flip a switch that pumps in nitrous oxide.
12:23 PM Mr. Silver
No, I mean - "Welcome aboard.  When you wake up you'll be in London and it will have felt like 20 minutes."
12:23 PM Mr. Blue
Hahah
What a great idea!
"Whether you have plastic explosives in your underwear or you're just a nervous flyer, KO Airlines is right for you!"
12:24 PM Mr. Brown
Somebody will say: “What happens when the plane is going down?  How will they protect themselves?”
12:25 PM Mr. Silver
First class gets a bed instead of a recliner, and a voucher for a 4-star restaurant meal when you land.
12:26 PM Mr. Brown
If you have sleep apnea, please let us know ahead of time so we can accommodate you.”
If you would like a meal on your flight, choose ahead of time and we’ll have it pumped directly to your stomach.”
12:28 PM Mr. Silver
Nah...they would have to worry about pee breaks then.
12:28 PM Mr. Brown
Pee bags provided.”
lol
12:29 PM Mr. Silver
"Thank you for joining us on Jet Blue.  Have you peed sir?  Step that way to the restroom queue please.  Next?  Thank you for joining us on Jet Blue.  Have you peed ma'am?"
12:31 PM Mr. Brown
Court houses never really have too many incidents, and they don't use anything but metal detectors.
12:32 PM Mr. Silver
"Nobody move and no one gets hurt!  Your Honor, I want you to fly this courthouse to Iran!"
12:33 PM Mr. Brown
There is more of a chance of somebody walking into the new trade centers and blowing them up that way.
Or even the Pentagon.
12:36 PM Mr. Silver
How big of a bomb do you think it takes to knock down a skyscraper, Mr. Brown?
hehe
"Excuse me sir.  Security check.  We've heard rumors this building is a possible terrorist target...sorry.  Could you remove all metal, your jacket, and the box truck you are carrying and place them into the tray for inspection, sir?"
"There's nothing in the box truck except my ID and a few dollars, dude."
"I understand, but it's the rules, thank you."
(examines)
"The truck is ok.  You can take your stuff and proceed in, sir.  Next please?"
(looks up...60 men in overalls each with the same model oversized lunchbox) 
"We're together."
12:40 PM Mr. Brown
Well you could always pull the whole “Bring it in the building in pieces” method.
1:07 PM Mr. Silver
The idea is more to take the building out in pieces.  



Mr. Silver
"I just think it's interesting and convenient that all these critics think they can analyze my plan when we all know that math is too hard to figure this kind of thing out, even with a calculator.  Seriously, it's like they're just making up numbers to criticize my idea." 
1:15 PM Mr. Silver
"Who can seriously look at a claim like ‘$10.7 trillion dollars’ without rolling their eyes?  A trillion is, like, millions of dollars!  Yeah, right!"
1:15 PM Mr. Brown
LOL
1:20 PM Mr. Silver
"And what's all this stuff about ‘paying for it’ anyway?  The point is to not pay more.  Of course I don't want to pay for it.  They have this all backwards!  It's just stupid liberal politics!"
1:26 PM Mr. Silver
"There isn't a conservative out there that doesn't know what I mean.  We keep saying 'lower taxes to fix the economy' and the liberals just don't get it.  Lower taxes means you pay less taxes, so you have more money...DUH!.  Just look at the facts!" 
1:33 PM Mr. Silver
Anyway...that was my impersonation of Mitt if he was the "Math is Hard" Barbie.
1:34 PM Mr. Blue
"Don't ask me, I’m just a girl!"
1:34 PM Mr. Silver
"Let's go shopping!"
  


Mr. Silver
Speaking of conservative gaffe-masters....
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2012/03/06/limbaugh-blasts-overeducated-young-single-white-women/
1:56 PM Mr. Silver
"Hey!  I apologized for calling that over-educated unintelligent woman a slut and prostitute.  What's her problem now?"
1:56 PM Mr. Blue
I descended to their level when I used those two words to describe Sandra Fluke.”
Mr. Silver
He had to crawl up a few flights before making the descent.
1:57 PM Mr. Blue
Right, because liberals are always calling women sluts.
1:57 PM Mr. Silver
I only do when they ask me to in private, and even then it bugs me. ;-)
1:59 PM Mr. Blue
Heheh
2:10 PM Mr. Blue
"Oooo!  Call me an independent woman!"
2:11 PM Mr. Blue
"Oh yeah!  Now tell me I’m radical and a progressive free thinker!  Oh God!  That's it!!!"



Mr. Teal
End result for Apple - $46.3 billion in sales last quarter.  That is only 4 months.
11:55 AM Mr. Silver
Or 3, even.
11:55 AM Mr. Teal
Oooopsie
Quarter” threw me off.
Mr. Silver
(Flips Mr. Teal a 33.333 cent piece)
11:58 AM Mr. Silver
Check it out: President Taft on the front...Betsy Ross's cat on the back.
Mr. Blue
Heheh
I’m going to make some counterfeit $33.33 dollar bills.
12:05 PM Mr. Silver
Hehe
12:10 PM Mr. Silver
Cut a penny into 3rds for the gag
"I wouldn't want to short you...have a 3rd-Pence...It goes out an infinite number of places."



Mr. Yellow
My work truck is bleeding brake fluid all over the parking lot. The people that were using it killed my truck.
12:49 PM Mr. Silver
"I'm not sure what they could have hit it against...it's like a perfect perpendicular cut on the brake line."
"And the GM wanted me to run an errand 20 miles down the freeway today too."



12:39 PM Mr. Silver
Hey...if it didn't pass, the F-35 couldn't play football, and they're up for state champs this year!
12:41 PM Mr. Blue
heheh
That’s pretty ridiculous.
"Hey, let's waste billions and put the lives of our service men and women AND possibly all of our citizens at risk to save our own asses!" 
12:43 PM Mr. Silver
"Only specially qualified test pilots would be permitted to fly the jets, for now"
My grasp of English says that means there are no pilots rated to fly them except test pilots.
12:43 PM Mr. Brown
I think they did not want to look like idiots, but ended up making things worse.
12:45 PM Mr. Silver
"The F-35 did, in fact, get a passing grade in English Comp.  However it was given special permission to do its report on ‘Clifford the Big Red Dog’."



Mr. Gray
Man....how come I can’t get a McNugget worth $8k? Sheesh
1:28 PM Mr. Silver
It looks more like Jefferson to me.
He needs to wipe his nose too.
1:28 PM Mr. Gray
I thought it was a witch...the chin and nose.
1:29 PM Mr. Yellow
I think it looks like a chicken nugget, and I want the address and phone number of the person that paid for it.  I have some pictures of clouds to sell them.
1:30 PM Mr. Silver
"Next up for auction: Lot #15 - 'A chicken nugget that looks like one of those president guys on a coin.  Maybe the one on the quarter.' put up by Rebekah Speight"
1:32 PM Mr. Yellow
lol
1:32 PM Mr. Silver
It’s definitely Jefferson not Washington. 




12:31 PM Mr. Green
Good article
12:34 PM Mr. Silver
This is an interesting spin on the history of money and commerce...
I mean, apart from the complete fabrication of, or incorrect interpretation of, nearly every point in it leading to an utterly naive conclusion.
It’s the weirdest combination of partial facts and balloon juice I've seen in a while.
12:36 PM Mr. Green
Balloon juice.... that's an interesting term.
12:37 PM Mr. Silver
M.A.S.H.
Best term ever to come out of Major Frank Burns



Mr. Brown
(sings) Give me my Filet O’ Fish give me my fish, ahh!  http://www.wapt.com/r/30624769/detail.html
10:31 AM Mr. Silver
Considering the Filet o' Fish is a flavorless wad of dough except for the tartar sauce, it's even less of an issue to shoot someone over than most of McDonald’s menu items.
10:32 AM Mr. Blue
I would shoot someone if they *gave* me a Filet O’ Fish
10:33 AM Mr. Silver
Good call.
Going to lunch...I’m not having a Filet O’ Feh.



2:08 PM Mr. Brown
2:14 PM Mr. Silver
Hey...they were on stage with an audience.
Always remember to bring a cash box and ticket stubs to this kind of party, and say your “manager” told you he got a “permit”.