[11:31
AM] Mr. McGreen:
I
saw a skit about 2 guys who save $100k each for any superpower they
want so they picked healing factor and claws. Then they find
out that they have to pick one. Cut to a bedroom of them
screaming. They cant get them back in, covered in blood, and crying
[11:35
AM]
Well...the
one got healing factor anyway.
[11:35
AM] Mr. McGreen:
Oh
ok, you saw it?
[11:35
AM]
No
I'm
a teleport guy, myself.
[11:36
AM] Mr. McGreen:
I'd
like the power of the X-Man Forget Me Not.
His
power is to be forgotten.
And
basically he never gets credit for his work.
[11:37
AM]
I
possessed that power for years.
"This
is brilliant work! Someone else is in the area, I'll
congratulate him!"
[11:38
AM] Mr. McGreen:
What
of you, Mr. Blue?
[11:44
AM] Mr. Blue:
Invisibility
I guess, so long as it actually works.
[11:44
AM] Mr. McGreen:
But
you'd have to be naked.
[11:44
AM] Mr. Blue:
Fine.
[11:44
AM] Mr. McGreen:
LOL
[11:44
AM] Mr. Blue:
So
long as the contents of my stomach are also invisible.
[11:44
AM] Mr. McGreen:
I'd
say yes.
[11:45
AM]
Yes...granted.
It's
superhero invisibility, not chemistry.
[11:46
AM] Mr. Blue:
It
would probably be easier if it was clothing that did it, like a suit.
[11:47
AM] Mr. McGreen:
Or
an aura around you, like an inch around your body
[11:47
AM] Mr. Blue:
Yeah
[11:47
AM]
How
about an ancient necromantic gold ring of power. What could go wrong?
[11:47
AM] Mr. McGreen:
I
want a Guyver suit
[11:49
AM] Mr. Blue:
Predator's invisibility tech is a little clunky
[11:50
AM]
Bit.
[11:50
AM] Mr. McGreen:
Yeah
[11:50
AM]
But
better than none, and nice in a busy environment.
I'd
do too many immoral things when invisible.
And
I get cold too easily if it required nudity.
Fortunately,
I want teleportation instead, and teleportation wouldn't let me do
anything immoral or abusive.
[12:03
PM] Mr. McGreen:
You
could kick the crap out of someone.
[12:03
PM]
Can
do that without the teleportation power anyway.
[12:03
PM] Mr. McGreen:
Ohhhh
I
couldn't
I'm
a delicate snowflake
I'd
street race Mr. Blue for pinks though.
[12:05
PM]
I'd
just teep to the finish
"Did
the quarter mile in 0.0000!"
[12:06
PM] Mr. McGreen:
Could
you teleport things?
By
holding on to them?
[12:07
PM]
Like
carrying? Or conjuring?
[12:07
PM] Mr. McGreen:
If
you hold on to them.
[12:07
PM]
(conjuring
would be awesome too...probably my #2 choice)
I'd
want to be able to carry yes.
It would be hard to retrieve the property that is my divine right
from a bank or some-such without being able to carry it away.
[12:09
PM] Mr. McGreen:
But
if you don't know what the inside of a place looks like you could teleport into something.
You're playing with fire. Line of sight only? Do photographs work?
[12:09
PM]
Well
I'd want it flawless.
[12:09
PM] Mr. McGreen:
That's
not even fair
[12:09
PM]
A
flawed teleport power is basically instant death.
Even
in space.
Thus
conjuration is actually a better idea.
But
I'd prefer a nice flawless teleport given the option.
[12:12
PM] Mr. McGreen:
Then
I would start an international teleportation crimes division.
[12:13
PM]
I'd
be there to enforce any violations for you; you can count on me! ;-)
[2:31
PM]
WTF
is wrong with Apple anyway?
This
agent's stinking iPhone is supposedly the latest and greatest.
They
added YET ANOTHER level of redundancy to get to the damned mail
settings...followed by YET ANOTHER...
And
the last one doesn't work.
I
had to have this victim open Mail and get an error so we could
tap Settings and go where we needed to be.
“Ok
Todd... So it's Settings... Mail... Accounts... Pick the Katzenjammer
mail... Then Mail... Then choose Mail or Notes - neither one works."
“But
that's OK because they'll do something stupider in the next version.”
(They
did – Mr. Silver)
"Tell
you what - Just open the Mail program. You got an error?
Tap Settings. Ok we're in."
[2:38
PM] Mr. Blue:
It's
insane how deep you have to dig to check SMTP settings.
Its
gotta be like 9 or 10 clicks
[2:38
PM]
I
think it's actually two more than that to get in.
That
password crap they do in the desktop client is worth a lawsuit too.
I
can't even fathom how it's not intentionally done to generate support
calls to make money.
[2:45
PM] Mr. McGreen:
They
need sued.
[2:52
PM]
(sings)
"Toooo many clicks on the iPhone!"
"Toooo
many clicks on the iPhone!"
"Too
many clicks!"
"Toooo
many clicks on the iPhone!"
"Too
many clicks!"
"Too
many cliiiiiicks on the iii-Phooooone!"
"TOO
MANY CLICKS!"
[2:53
PM] Mr. McGreen:
“Too
many clicks, too hard to set this!”
[2:55
PM]
“Too
many dead ends, too many tricks!”
[3:00
PM] Mr. McGreen:
“Pretty
pissed off at those Apple pricks!”
“Not
satisfied with this iPhone 6!”
[3:03
PM] Mr. Blue:
lol
[3:04
PM]
The
man can even slide in on Flight of the Conchords improv. We should
have had him in here years ago.
[1:11
PM] Mr. McGreen:
You
ever have the drink "mate"?
[1:13
PM]
What
drink, "buddy"?
[1:14
PM] Mr. McGreen:
Yerba
mate
It's
an antioxidant tea.
Out
of a gourd with a filtered straw.
I
need a new gourd, though.
[1:15
PM]
(looks)
"Even
the Pope (pictured,
spitting) loves it!"
[1:18
PM] Mr. McGreen:
It
lasts for a while before you have to add new leaves, so people in
South America will carry thermoses of hot water around.
[1:19
PM]
That's
a serious tea commitment.
[1:19
PM] Mr. McGreen:
Add
hot water, drink, add more hot water etc. til the flavor is gone.
I'll
let you try some when I get my new gourd if you'd like.
[1:20
PM]
"Just
drink the drink!"
[9:29
AM] Mr. McGreen:
Either
of you fellas see “Slumber Party Massacre”?
Looks
like a gem
[9:32
AM]
Nope
(movie
trailer voice)
"8
unsuspecting babes...
“8
square feet of clothing...
“8
IQs...
“8
years too old for slumber parties...
“Gathered
together at 8PM...
"For 8 hours...
"OF TERROR!"
[9:36
AM] Mr. McGreen:
Hey,
you can never grow out of slumber parties.
You
guys wanna come over for a slumber party?
We
can talk about girls.
[9:48
AM]
"Slumber
Party Massacre 2: Guys Night In"
[9:48
AM] Mr. McGreen:
No,
we would be on 4.
The
2nd apparently had a man with a guitar with a drill on it.
The
3rd appeared to have a guy with a jackhammer.
[9:49
AM]
"OMG! Jackie, Mandy, and Suzie are dead! We should just leave!"
"But
its raining."
"Oh! My
hair... Well... We'll just have to stay."
