(The following Mr. Brown lines are unedited so they...well...WE make sense. - Mr. Silver)
[12:09
PM] Mr. Brown:
So
i went and asked for pain killers and tried to day pain pills and
ended up saying i need some pewen
[12:12
PM] Ms. Rose:
*attempts
to de-code Mr. Brown-Speak*
[12:16
PM] Mr. Blue:
Yeah
that sentence makes no sense
[12:17
PM] Mr. Brown:
oops
put in day instead of say
i
did actually say pewen
[12:18
PM] Mr. Blue:
Where
did you go to ask for this?
[12:18
PM] Mr. Silver:
At
the pewen store
[12:18
PM] Mr. Brown:
i
started in the middle of a thought again
[12:18
PM] Mr. Blue:
At
the pewmacy
He's
just another pew-popper
[12:19
PM] Mr. Silver:
How
many pews are you taking already?
[12:19
PM] Mr. Brown:
3
lol
[12:20
PM] Mr. Silver:
You
need stronger pews.
[12:20
PM] Mr. Blue:
He's
pewverdosing
[12:20
PM] Mr. Silver:
I
suggest refried black beans, hard boiled eggs, and extra pulpy orange
juice
But
for the love of God, don't do that to the rest of us before
coming into work, OK?
[12:21
PM] Mr. Brown:
Apparently
pewen is a place in chili
lol
[12:21
PM] Mr. Silver:
Nice
3 bean chili with onions can give you a good pewen experience.
(It's
“Chile”)
[12:22
PM] Mr. Blue:
The
manufacturer of pewen must be ILP - Industrial Light and
Pharmaceuticals
(two
stormtroopers)
"Ahh,
I’ve got a splitting headache."
"Here,
take two of these."
"Mmm.
Pewen. Yellow. Different."
[12:22
PM] Mr. Silver:
(later)
- *PEW PEW PEW!!!* - "I feel GREAT! Thanks! …
Still can't hit anything though!"
[12:24
PM] Ms. Rose:
Guys.
Stop. (rofl)(rofl)(rofl)(rofl)
[9:42
AM] Mr. Blue:
Watched
this:
Lots
of talk of "demanding satisfaction", but a good movie
Keith
Carradine - who I had only seen in 1 other thing prior - was very
good
I
think it was Ridley Scott's first film
[9:48
AM] Mr. Silver:
I
enjoyed that one
Caught
it partway through the first time, looked for it for a long time
after before I found it to rent.
[9:49
AM] Mr. Blue:
It
was what Barry Lyndon should've been
Its
apparently based on a true story
[9:59
AM] Mr. Silver:
The
title in France was changed to "Le Lieutenant Feraud est un Âne
Complet"
[10:00
AM] Mr. Blue:
Heh
I
even had dreams about a'holes like him after
I
dreamt I was in line at Chik-fil-A and some lady tried to balance her
drink on my shoulder while she did something else and it spilled and
she was mad at me about it.
And
then the restaurant was like "Sir, we think you should leave"
"DO
AN INQUIRY!"
[10:02
AM] Mr. Silver:
"We
shall meet at lunch rush!"
"I
select wafflecut fries and Heinz dip cups."
[10:04
AM] Mr. Blue:
Alternate
US title: “The Satisfaction Demanders”
[10:07
AM] Mr. Silver:
That
the cut the Rolling Stones did the soundtrack for?
[10:08
AM] Ms. Rose:
They
can't get no.
[10:09
AM] Mr. Silver:
No.
No no.
[10:11
AM] Ms. Rose:
Hey
hey hey.
[10:11
AM] Mr. Silver:
(concertina
music...Mick Jagger in a stripy shirt and beret, smoking, singing languidly
into a baguette) "Je ne peux pas obtenir aucune
sa-tis-fac-tion..."
[10:12
AM] Ms. Rose:
(rofl)
[10:23
AM] Mr. Blue:
Did
I tell you about the Anthony Wiener documentary? If I didn't, I
recommend it. It's good.
[10:23
AM] Ms. Rose:
He
said Wiener. Huh huh huh!
[10:23
AM] Mr. Silver:
Hmm…
hnn... YEAH! He DID! ... WEE-neeeer...
[10:23
AM] Mr. Blue:
Very
interesting look behind the scenes of a campaign with scandals and
all
[10:23
AM] Mr. Silver:
Saw
it was on demand... it didn't really draw my interest.
[10:23
AM] Mr. Blue:
It's
fairly done
He's
actually endearing, even if he's also a creep
And
you get to hear a lot from his wife, Huma
[10:26
AM] Mr. Silver:
“You
hear a lot from his human wife.”
The
“Endearing Creep” is a staple of the American sitcom since the
80s
[Bland
theme music, insipid lyrics, montage of family photos]
(Audience
claps as scene opens on barely 18 daughter in slip trying to decide
between two outfits in front of mirror)
(Creepy
nerdy neighbor kid walks into girl’s bedroom unasked, crowd goes
wild)
"Hey
Hershel! I'm in my underwear,
you know!"
(goofy
voice) "That's OK! I'm in some of it too!"
(crowd
goes wild)
“You
should knock for my permission to come up to my room!”
(mugging
for audience) “With your permission, I'll
knock you up any time!”
(crowd
goes wild, whistling)
(completely
clueless) "Thanks! So how was your big date last night?"
(stupid
pose established in season 3) "It was great! Dinner,
dancing, a walk in the park, and another restraining order hearing!"
(crowd
goes wild)
[10:31
AM] Mr. Silver:
God
how I hate those characters...
[10:31
AM] Mr. Blue:
LOL
[10:17
AM] Mr. Silver:
Wow...article
topic aside, check out the amazing physical characteristics of the
fellow on the right.
[10:18
AM] Mr. Blue:
The
Popeye of calves
Ironic
that a bull is staring at his calves
"God
has blessed me with cantaloupe calves and the head the size of a
lady's fist."
[10:21
AM] Ms. Rose:
The
bull on the ground can't take his eyes away from those legs. He's
mesmerized.
[10:22
AM] Mr. Blue:
Supposedly,
the ancient Greek wrestler Milo of Croton got stronger by carrying a
calf around on his back every day. As it grew larger, he grew
stronger
The
original progressive overload
Another
exercise idea if Farmcore* doesn't work out: The Wheel of Pain from
Conan
Chain
10 guys to a grinding wheel...last man standing gets absolutely
yoked. The other 9? Well... Just make sure they sign waivers and
the cheques clear.
(*The
Farmcore Diet and Exercise Program is one of the funniest things
we've ever written...so...of course...I lost it. I sifted through
files for days trying to get it back. I will be punished in Heaven
for not giving it to the world – Mr. Silver)
[10:28
AM] Mr. Silver:
Hehe
(Chronicler)
"From that day, Mighty Conan walked forward with his arms
stretched before him, knowing no other way."
[10:30
AM] Mr. Blue:
LOL
[10:33
AM] Mr. Silver:
"Never
retreating from the enemy. Never lowering his weapons.
For Conan could not walk backwards or lower his limbs. Through
the ancient kingdoms he conquered, always drifting to the left."
[10:44
AM] Mr. Blue:
Conan
couldn't have even been able to stand upright with the kind of
muscular imbalances the grinding wheel would create.
Unless
he was leaning against something
[10:44
AM] Mr. Silver:
Yes...
Actually,
when I think about it, he'd always drift right, not left.
Because
his whole left side would have been a fair bit larger and stronger.
[10:45
AM] Mr. Blue:
Yeah...it
went counter-clockwise in the film.
[10:46
AM] Mr. Brown:
"Conan: The Guy That's Really Good At Pushing Heavy Objects"
[10:48
AM] Mr. Silver:
Conan:
The Pusher
Would
be a funny comic or short...Conan solving everything by inexorably
pushing against things
[10:50
AM] Mr. Blue:
That
would be good
He'd
always need a convenient log or boulder around
[10:51
AM] Mr. Brown:
And
he can never go backwards
[10:52
AM] Mr. Blue:
He'd
be in some ornate palace.. and there's just a boulder sitting there
in the right place.
In
the desert... “Look! A log! Just what Conan needs!”
[10:52
AM] Ms. Rose:
I
always loved the Conan the Librarian skit from the UHF movie.
"These
books are laaaaaaate!" *huge sword comes smashing down*
[10:54
AM] Mr. Blue:
Heh.
I don't remember that, but it sounds funny
[10:55
AM] Ms. Rose:
[10:57
AM] Mr. Blue:
Maybe
they had alternating push/pull days on the grinding wheel and just
didn't show it.
[10:57
AM] Mr. Brown:
Right,
for balance.
Maybe
one day a week they had everybody pushing oposite directions for more
resistance.
I
wonder if the wheel ever broke
Like
there was a couple solid weeks of no pushing and they start going into
decline.
[10:57
AM] Mr. Blue:
The
best part of the Wheel of Pain is the music. It's like orchestral
metal
[10:58
AM] Mr. Brown:
Since
that was all of his early training, maybe dub Eye of the Tiger over
the scene.
[10:58 AM] Mr. Blue:
LOL
Do
like an 80s montage in a Hyborian setting
Conan
keeps coming out of a tent trying on different animal skins and war
helmets, and the Mongols keep shaking their heads in disapproval
