514 - Big Bare Boobs, Bombs, and Violence

[8:44 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

I'm gonna watch Blade Runner, i swear

I cant remember, are there sex and boobies in Blade Runner?

dunno if it should be a dad and mom only movie

[8:46 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

some boobs and some implied sex

[8:48 AM] 

Who in the house is afraid of boobs?

[8:48 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

nobody is afraid of them, but i'd like to limit my kid's boob exposure while he's still young

More of an issue in Mrs. McGreen's eyes TBH

i'm slightly more...European-thinking

[8:49 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

the boobs aren't shown in a sexual manner, it's just a lady getting changed

[8:50 AM] 

I think the violence is probably more of an issue than boobs

BLAM!  BLOOD SPLASH!  FLYING PARTS! 

"Close your eyes...boobs."

BOOM!

[8:51 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

We actually put our foot down on like, ultra violence

i wouldn't let him watch Robocop for example

little much

i think most people are under the impression if you let your kids see boobs and sexualized material they'll grow up to be sex fiends

Apparently once when i was little i was at a flea market and found a Playboy stash for sale, so i grabbed one and ran off to look at it and giggle

[9:09 AM] 

My hero!

[9:16 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

funny story.  my dad is a homophobe and my brother revealed a guy went down on him once and apparently my dad was utterly disgusted.  so my dad calls me to tell the story and my response was "well, ok.  i mean whatever he's into right?" and hes like "WHAT? you dont see anything wrong with that!? *click* "

[9:17 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

lol

also lol @ "revealing" such a thing to your dad

[9:18 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

Haha, yea i guess.  Apparently he said "you cant tell the difference!"

[9:18 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

so your brother is gay? or just experimenting

[9:18 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

idk man, hes really into drugs so i mean, that may play a role

lol

truthfully idk

[9:19 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

ahh

[9:21 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

But “geez dad, its 2017”

i remember when i announced the news about my first kid. 

first words from his mouth "you're getting rid of it right?"

[9:22 AM] 

Ugh

To quote some gay friends who turned out to be irritated that I'm totally straight "Everyone's gay after enough drinks."

A phenom I half-witnessed in college (first half, fortunately...was gone for part 2)

[9:25 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

lol

[9:25 AM] 

Apparently breaking the gaydar of fellows with a solid detection record is a bad thing.

[9:29 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

i actually have a lot of respect for people who are openly and sometimes flamboyantly gay in places like (town)

i mean im sure its never easy coming out, but with a bunch of rednecks and bigots it would have to be harder

[9:31 AM] 

yes

I think their clinching clue (and final mistake) was me borrowing "Vegas in Space" 

[9:43 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

That looks like the opposite to "Gay N***ers From Outer Space"

which is hilarious

[9:43 AM] 

They didn't know of my love for terrible movies and my joy at finding an actual full copy of something that ridiculous I'd only seen part of on...like...Night Flight years before.

[9:43 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

that got rated higher than ROTOR

[9:48 AM] 

Which one...or both?

[9:51 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

ROTOR is lower on IMBD than Vegas in space

[9:52 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

did you watch ROTOR?

[9:53 AM]  Mr. McGreen: 

no but i looked it up when you and Mr. Brown talked about it

[9:54 AM] 

Not seen it, no

[9:54 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

it has a Rifftrax

it's pretty, pretty, pretty, preeetttyyy bad

the riffs are good

[9:59 AM] 

Ed Wood bad?

WWEWF?

[10:00 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

what's the F?

[10:00 AM] 

Film

[10:00 AM]  Mr. Blue: 

ah

i'd say it's not quite Ed Wood level incompetency

awfully close

[10:00 AM] 

Wow

[1:57 PM] 

So

About once a year "Heavy Metal" rolls around on demand and I watch it. 

Had nothing to do the other night.

Poured a drink...

Queued it up. 

Got to the end of Harry Canyon...

And then woke up as Tarna was diving into the volcano.

"Hmmm...shorter than I remember..."

Doesn't count...have to go again. 

I think...but I'm not 100% sure, that Silver Junior quipped "That was quite a movie you were watching."

No idea how much he actually watched

[2:09 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

heh

[2:10 PM] 

Eh...he's 13 1/2 and I've seen some of his browsing he's forgotten to erase. 

Might just have him sit through it if he saw most already.

Some will say it's about his maturity level anyway.  :D

I think it's testament to the original that “Heavy Metal 2000” is never on.

NOT making an anthology film derived from an anthology magazine was just the weirdest decision. 

HM is a magazine of edgy/adult sci-fi/fantasy short stories.  They made an animated "issue" of the magazine. It made sense.

(HM-2000 brainstorming session - “I know! Let's fuck up the concept!”)

Like "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves".

If they'd changed the names and all that, it was an acceptable medieval adventure movie.

It was a terrible Robin Hood movie.

[2:25 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

Yeah

[2:25 PM] 

Re-title "Heavy Metal 2000" to something else and they might have a lingering audience.

I think I remember actually liking it.  But...meh.

[2:36 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

I really hated the newer Robin Hood despite it's decent cast

(Not the 2018 one that looks like they copied the “Thief” games – Mr. Silver)

[I F-Bombed that one - out loud - in the theater the instant the title card popped in the trailer – Mr. Silver]

I remember seeing Prince of Thieves in theaters and thinking it was very dreary and at times grotesque

I never re-watched, maybe i should

[2:46 PM] 

http://www.dreadcentral.com/news/227854/exclusive-kevin-eastman-status-new-heavy-metal-movie/

This looks pretty - http://www.heavymetal.com/news/animated-film-the-planet-of-doom-channels-spirit-of-heavy-metal-movie/

Back to previous...I'm not sure I've liked a Robin Hood or King Arthur film that's been tried for ages.

“Excalibur” is quite possibly as good as will be made. 

[3:13 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

That one's too weird

I guess studios and directors have to straddle the fence of showing realism but also being palatable to the masses

[3:29 PM] 

“Excalibur”?

[3:30 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

Yeah, it's good but weird

[3:30 PM] 

I liked it young because it was that kinda movie and they didn't make a lot. 

Over time...and reading...and an Arthurian Lit and Medieval Studies courses...

And a LOT of poor King Arthur films...

It doesn't actually do too bad of a job covering everything

Somehow packed into 140 minutes

[3:39 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

I think it's how they covered it that was weird

I think it was a limitation of the special effects / budget

or just Boorman's strange mind

[1:49 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

Tom:  "I've been working my whole life and i don't know why criminals do what they do."

Really? You don't?

[2:06 PM]  Mr. Brown: 

chemical imbalances

and tom ate their food

gotta survive

[2:07 PM] 

(article title) "Porch Pirates" are ""quote"" "ruining Christmas" this year..."""""""

Ok I added a few unnecessary quote marks 

[2:08 PM]  Mr. Brown: 

plundering the Amazon gifts

soon we will have remote turrets and cameras

“I see you stealing my package”

ZXZZZZZZZZz!!!!

[2:10 PM] 

I've been plotting a porch bomb. 

Pick up the wrong “delivery” and it goes off like those paint bombs they attach to shoplift targets or in bank bags

I'll wash my porch...that's fine.  But I want semi-permanent blue/green all over the perp for days. 

[2:11 PM]  Mr. Brown: 

make a box that people delivering can put it in and only you can take out

kinda like the puzzle box from Hellraiser

open at own risk of dying by cenobite

so far out where i live its not so bad yet

I have not had anything taken, but we are an area of farmland meaning more neighbors who will shoot them.

[2:17 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

i'm missing a package

USPS said they put it in my mailbox but i never got it

[2:17 PM] 

hehe...

Here we go: www.burglarbomb.com

[2:20 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

this was delivered 11/30 supposedly

[2:20 PM]  Mr. Brown: 

It prob was

[2:20 PM]  Mr. Blue: 

i filled out a case form thing on the usps website

i'm sure they're on it