[3:13
PM] Ms. Rose:
Maybe
I should be a surrogate. Wonder if there's any money in it. I mean,
I'd be willing to carry a kid and lie about drinking too much, if
there was a paycheck. Pretty sure I have the hips, and then some.
Oh,
wait. Scary genes. Never mind. :P
[3:16
PM] Mr. Brown:
Is
there any genetic transfer in a surrogate?
[3:16
PM]
Well...you
don't typically get the fun part as a surrogate, do you? You're
just a...flowerpot...
[3:16
PM] Mr. Brown:
I
mean, they put a fully fertilized egg in
[3:16
PM] Mr. Blue:
No,
they're just a host
[3:17
PM] Ms. Rose:
I
can be a vessel. So long as I don't have to – like – love the
thing that comes out or do diaper stuff or anything.
[3:17
PM]
It'd
be kind of like Alien
(negotiating
surrogate deal) "And finally...I'm pretty hard into sci-fi.
I'd like the delivery to take place on a breakfast table in a space
ship set with a crew."
[3:17
PM] Mr. Brown:
That's
an issue with most surrogates - you get separation anxiety
[3:18
PM] Ms. Rose:
Yeah,
I'm pretty sure that won't be an issue for me. Since I would want to
be separated from "it" the moment "it" was part
of me.
It's
different with cats/kittens.
[3:19
PM] Mr. Brown:
What
was that 80's or 90's film where they grabbed a dude off the street
then hunted him?
I
keep thinking Ice T was in it
[3:19
PM] Ms. Rose:
Kninghtrider?
[3:19
PM] Mr. Blue:
The
Pest?
[3:20
PM] Mr. Brown:
No
[3:20
PM] Ms. Rose:
“My
Little Pony and the Case of the Dude Off the Street!”
[3:20
PM]
Some
version of “The Most Dangerous Game”, clearly.
I
still want to remake “The Most Dangerous Game” with boring
clueless "prey"
(rich
guy walks into room where 'game' started, 20-somethings milling
about)
"What
is this? I gave you all 40 minutes head start and you're still
here!"
"Stocked
bar, dude!"
"Woo!"
"I
still don't know what I'm supposed to do."
"There's
no cell signal on this island, like, at all."
[3:24
PM] Mr. Blue:
Heh
[3:25
PM]
"THOMPSON!"
"Sir?"
"You
gave these buffoons the packets, right?"
"Yes
sir."
"Did
they read them???"
"No
sir. They pocketed the cheques and then started, as they say,
partyin' down, sir."
"THIS
IS NOT WHAT I WANTED TO DO TODAY!!!"
"No
sir..."
[3:29
PM] Mr. Brown:
Here
it is: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surviving_the_Game
Says
he is going to be a Hunting Guide, then hunts him
[3:31
PM]
Sounds
fun
Honestly
I wouldn't run either.
I'd
be more inclined to hang around until they left to look for me.
"Mr.
Silver stars in 'The Most God-Awful Expensive Hunting Mistake'."
(Billionaire
reading note by burning wreck of helicopter) "Hi! I
realized I couldn't fly a helicopter and couldn't use it to to escape
, so I blew it up. I looked up how much they cost on your computer before formatting your hard drives. Wow, your lordship!
I know you're rich, but I hope this was worth it! On that note,
if you haven't been there yet you'd better head over to your car collection."
[1:42
PM]
11.
"Never underestimate the power of a skin-tight shirt and belt
buckle to the side."
12.
"Squares will talk if you ask them questions. Use it to hit him
while he's off guard or ridicule him."
13.
"If you can get a baby, knock him out with the baby, Baby."
[1:48
PM] Mr. Brown:
14.
Remember that pinky! Do a pinky jab to the eye - fight over.
[1:52
PM] Mr. Blue:
15.
Never, ever hit a broad, unless she's being extra lippy or just won't
listen.
[1:53
PM] Mr. Brown:
16.
Use plenty of hair oil - that stuff keeping it in place will be your
best friend when deflecting a blow.
[11:14
AM]
Beginning
of the week "I'm going to Aldi to get ingredients for dinner.
Anything else?"
(Mrs
Silver) "Something for breakfast."
Everyone
is tired of bagels and English muffins
"Fine!
I shall get croissants!"
Aldi
mini croissants...
12
to the pack...
Turned
out to be quite nice when I had one with breakfast next morning,
probably enhanced by my investment in a block of Kerrygold butter.
I
come home from work to an empty box.
“Augh!”
“What?"
"You
guys ate 11 croissants today!"
"I
didn't eat ANY!"
Yes,
that's right – Silver Jr. ate 11 croissants
And
spent a lot of time in the bathroom...
And
got lots of angry glares
So
Last
night
We're at Aldi
"Croissants?"
"Sure!
I'll get to eat one this time."
"Yeah.
Junior, that better not happen again."
This
morning...I have a croissant
Back
for lunch, Mrs. Silver away...there are 6 left in the box.
"Um..."
"I
had 3, Mom had 2."
"Oh...OK."
(Mom
arrives later)
"So
now that you've had an Aldi croissant, what do you think?"
"I
haven't had any yet."
"BUSTED!!!"
"I
swear! I had 3!"
“Who
broke into the house and stole the other two? Can you describe
him?"
"The
box was short."
"No"
"I
had one last night."
"No,
I opened them this morning."
etc
etc
So
That
is the endorsement for Aldi mini croissants.
[11:24
AM] Ms. Rose:
Crack-ssants
[11:38
AM] Mr. Brown:
How
is he eating that many??? LOL
[11:39
AM] Mr. Blue:
I
could probably polish off a bag of normal-sized croissants
[10:54
AM] Ms. Rose:
I
keep watching stuff and forgetting the things I said about it.
[10:54
AM] Mr. Brown:
Watching
what?
Like
movies?
[11:17
AM]
I
think she's forgotten already
[11:30
AM] Mr. Brown:
LOL
[11:31
AM] Ms. Rose:
I
need a new Pearl Jam tattoo.
[12:24
PM]
Like
what?
[12:28
PM] Mr. Brown:
You
could do a bite mark in that place where he said that kid bite that
lady in that song
[12:38
PM]
Risky. Make sure you don't forget the lyrics. All those people online with misheard lyrics tattoos and stuff. Have them write
"Pearl Jam" and then in quotes with music notes "Oh, I I I I
I'm still a guy!"
[9:01
AM] Mr. Brown:
We
finished Brown Jr's giraffe diorama and gathered some facts
[9:05
AM]
School
assignment I assume
[9:05
AM] Mr. Brown:
Yep.
[9:05
AM]
Did you have to cut a hole in the shoe box for the neck to stick up out of?
[9:06
AM] Mr. Brown:
He
has to state 5 facts
One
issue was when Mrs. Brown and Junior made the trees, they did not see
how tall the giraffe was we bought
So
all the trees are shorter than the giraffe
I
learned that Giraffes don't sleep a lot
[9:20
AM]
Hard
to find a bed to fit...
Need
to be shaped like a really long grand piano with a little pillow on the narrow end
[1:47
PM]
Damn
it Lou Reed!!!!
Have
had "Perfect Day" stuck in my head a week...maybe two.
People
like "Walk on the Wild Side", but "Perfect Day"
is...perfect.
[1:59
PM] Mr. Brown:
Replace
it with Welcome to Munchkin Land
[2:11
PM]
"Dorothy
Gale, hit the Yellow Brick Road...
Lookin'
for Kansas everywhere she go...
Made
three gay friends on the way
Killed
two witches and should killed three singin'
'Hey
girl, click your heels on the wild side.'
She
said 'Hey girl! Click your heels on the wild side'...
All
right..."
"Ding
da ding...ding ding da-dong.
Ding
da ding, ding ding da-dong..."
(There's
something wrong in my head...)
[2:16
PM] Mr. Brown:
LOL
Mashups
[2:23
PM]
If
only there was a way to make a living writing clever spoof lyrics of
popular songs.
(*With
no other musical ability)
[2:23
PM] Mr. Brown:
Weird
Al
[2:30
PM]
T'was
a joke sir...a joke
[2:32
PM] Mr. Brown:
Haha
I'm
sure Weird Al would not let you be Weird Silver
[2:36
PM]
Honestly
I never though many of the early spoofs that made him famous were any
good.
He
got better
A
lot of the old ones were about the lyrical talent level of "T'was" Poets
"T'was
the Poem Contest challenge, and all through the crowd,
Not
a talent existed, though many were loud..."
The
hopes were all raised, that before final buzzer,
Not
a single submission, would be from a 'T'was-er'."
I
will not dirty myself continuing this poem.
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