[2:10
PM] Mr. Silver:
I
used to joke that when Silver Jr. showed overt interest in sexual
things, I'd take him to a "category" site and say:
"Ok...point out 3 things you like..."
(consider
his choices)
"Ok,
you're Ok."
[2:11
PM] Mr. Brown:
“You
really like that? (points finger) REALLY? She is dressed like a
horse with somebody riding her"
"I
like horses."
[2:12
PM] Mr. Silver:
That
is a fear
[2:15
PM] Mr. Brown:
"Redheads?
There's a good one, son! Good going!"
"Feet?
Um. Ok, I think you might want to rethink that one."
"Balloon
popping?"
There
is way too much weird shit out there
Ok,
so maybe the children need some guidance
I
used to watch that HBO Real Sex
There was some messed up shit back then, and that show is old.
[2:18
PM] Mr. Silver:
"HBO's
'Sex that is Real Somewhere'."
[2:24
PM] Mr. Brown:
You
ever look at one of those lists of categories? Holy crap!
[2:25
PM] Mr. Silver:
I
like Richard Jenni's spin on adult entertainment: "All these
films should be titled the same thing: "Things That Will Never
Happen To You Ever"."
[2:27
PM] Mr. Brown:
Yes!
LOL
If
they titled them that, things would get better. We would not be
making dumb teenagers that think this stuff will happen to them.
There
is this one F'd up thing I saw on a site once
[2:28
PM] Mr. Silver:
...by
mistake, while looking up church stuff...
[2:28
PM] Mr. Brown:
There
are videos of this dude just sneaking behind women and
you-know-what-ing on them without them knowing.
How
is he not arrested?
[2:29
PM] Mr. Silver:
...because
its fake?
[2:29
PM] Mr. Brown:
I
questioned that multiple times when pondering how he is not arrested.
The
only thing I could come up with is they are foreign, so rules are
different there?
[2:32
PM] Mr. Silver:
Not
that different.
But
yes, that's true: The scripts and actor payments are, for instance,
in French text and currency.
Or
Russian.
[2:35
PM] Mr. Brown:
Russians
are crazy
Taking
notes, Ms. Rose?
LOL
You
can tell Mr Oleo all the crazy shit out there
Or
should we take his tablet and check the history
LOL
[2:36
PM] Mr. Silver:
Mrs.
Brown would probably be interested in yours.
(Anyway...moving on... - Mr. Silver)
[2:38
PM] Ms. Rose:
I'm
pretty sure Mr. Oleo is going to jump ship in the next few weeks. But
I expect each of you--as my work-chat buds--to fully support ME.
Unless, of course, you need to call his department, in which case you
should totally do whatever he tells you to.
[2:39
PM] Mr. Blue:
Which
ship?
[2:39
PM] Mr. Brown:
relastionship?
[2:39
PM] Ms. Rose:
The
S.S. Rose...?
[2:39
PM] Mr. Brown:
Wow
I spelled that bad
relast
ionship
LOL
htting
that go so far slump
[2:41
PM] Mr. Silver:
"Captain!
Incoming Relastian Ion Ship!"
"Raise
shields! Rose Alert!"
[2:42
PM] Ms. Rose:
"Shields
compromised, sir! Initiating hull torpedoes..."
[2:43
PM] Mr. Brown:
"Sir!
I don't have enough crazy for you!"
[2:45
PM] Ms. Rose:
"These
torpedoes were not made for craziness! We'd best impale the white
whale with Truth Harpoons! Just like that Ahab guy did!"
[2:44
PM] Mr. Blue:
Why
do you think he's "jumping ship"?
[2:47
PM] Mr. Silver:
The
key here, of course, is determining if Ms. Rose is doing one of her
self-depreciating things, or being sarcastic.
As
the room is genuinely interested in our community member's
relationship status, we are actually asking "wassup?"
[2:48
PM] Mr. Brown:
The
kitten needs a kidney and he won't give her one
[2:49
PM] Ms. Rose:
Thank
you for representing "the room", Mr. Silver. It would be
great if we could all just go back to talking about something else.
So...
have any good jokes about failed relationships between perfectly
respectable individuals? LOL
[2:49
PM] Mr. Brown:
Well,
I had a 2-year Relastian Ion Ship and she broke up with me on AIM
WTF?
Couldn't
even do it in person or on the phone
Still
stings
[2:50
PM] Ms. Rose:
Two
years. Wow...
(Had
something mean typed. Deleted.)
[3:09
PM] Mr. Silver:
Nice
dodge, BTW
[3:09
PM] Ms. Rose:
*shifty
eyes*
[3:14
PM] Mr. Silver:
(Ms.
Rose) "Damn...had to say something... Uh...go goofy... Then Mr.
Silver will throw a lot of smarm in the room and they'll crack
jokes... CRAP! They are still interested! Ummm... Waffle until Mr.
Brown or Mr. Blue swim to the other side of the tank and forget I
said anything."
...
Well...
"Tis
better to have loved and lost than to have taken some shrapnel in
'Nam" - Alfred Lord Tennyson
Or
Tennisball
Or
maybe it was Rambo
One
of the great poets.
But
in all seriousness, Ms. Rose, the sentiment is true...
Shrapnel
sucks.
[3:24
PM] Ms. Rose:
Ahhhnold
always said it was "not a tooo-mah". So there's that. :P
[3:24
PM] Mr. Silver:
Yes
(bows
head and contemplates the wisdom)
[11/27/2015
8:27 AM] Mr. Silver:
Decent
Turkey Day?
[11/27/2015
8:28 AM] Mr. Blue:
I
worked but it was fine, you?
[11/27/2015
8:31 AM] Mr. Silver:
Lot
of scramble to get prepped and then a lot of sitting around after
eating it all.
[11/27/2015
8:31 AM] Mr. Blue:
We
did our traditional spicy sausage pasta thing but with chicken
sausage instead of pork (accidentally). Just as good though
[11/27/2015
8:33 AM] Mr. Silver:
Isn't
that always the way? First the chickens sneak in, and then in a few
years...BAM!!! Turkey sausage in your pasta!
[11/27/2015
8:33 AM] Mr. Blue:
me:
"This looks different."
mom:
(looks at package) "You're nuts. It's spicy Italian sausage."
me:
"It's pinker... not as red."
mom:
(looking closer) "Oops...chicken."
[11/27/2015
8:35 AM] Mr. Silver:
(horror
text rushes at screen) "They
never expected!!!!"
(horror
text rushes at screen) "...A
cruel mistake!!!!"
[11/27/2015
8:35 AM] Mr. Blue:
“Night
of the Chicken Sausage”!!!
[11/27/2015
8:39 AM] Mr. Silver:
(Tommy
and Alice, in the alley, sotto voce)
"Look!
It's Antonio the butcher...shh!"
"What?
What's wrong, Alice?"
"His
bushy mustache! It's gone!"
"My
God! He's not really Italian!”
“Oh
Tommy, I'm frightened!"
[11/27/2015
8:39 AM] Mr. Blue:
Heheh
After
it soaks up all the stuff (heavy cream, cooking wine, parsley,
rosemary, garlic cloves, red pepper) the type of meat is
unidentifiable
[11/27/2015
8:40 AM] Mr. Silver:
(horror
text rush) "What???"
(horror
text rush) "Were
they EATING?!?!"
...
(slurping
sounds & chicken clucking off-screen. Steadfast scientist
being clung to by gasping blonde)
"See
how it soaks up all the stuff? It would be nigh unidentifiable
if it weren't for that diabolic clucking."
"Oh
professor! How do we stop
it!?"
“Stop
cruel and heartless Nature in its progress? How indeed?”
...
(Wow!
There's a rare one. I just read this all over and couldn't stop
giggling. :-D Had to put an agent on hold! The mustache did it.)
[11/27/2015
2:37 PM] Ms. Rose:
Just
walked past the TV. A Fox news headline said: “Active Shooter at
Planned Parenthood in Colorado”.
(me)
"I bet it was an 'active shooter' who got those ladies into
trouble in the first place!" (I thank you...)
[11/27/2015
2:39 PM] Mr. Blue:
LOL
[11/27/2015
3:19 PM] Ms. Rose:
Thanks!
[11/27/2015
3:20 PM] Mr. Silver:
Bah-doom!
Chissshhhhhhh!
[9:40
AM] Ms. Rose:
Speaking
of smoke breaks... brb
[9:40
AM] Mr. Brown:
DEATH
TUBE
Smoking
cig on the cover
New
band name just popped into my head. LOL
[9:48
AM] Ms. Rose:
"We are
is DEATH TUBE and we're gonna ROCK YOU! Thank you, Detroit!"
*crowd goes nuts*
*band
exits stage to smoke*
[9:53
AM] Mr. Silver:
(embarrassing
pause...PA clicks) "Uhhh...the management would like everyone to
remain calm. Death Tube will be back, but due to federal
smoking regulations we-- CALM DOWN PEOPLE!!! STOP THROWING THE
CHAIRS!!!"
[9:56
AM] Ms. Rose:
I
genuinely miss huge concerts where all kinds of crap was being thrown
at the stage. Rock concerts nowadays are generally more well-behaved
than libraries. :(
But
I could tell stories...
[9:57
AM] Mr. Brown:
I
went to a Travis Tritt concert once. There was a warring not to throw
quarters at the stage.
[9:58
AM] Mr. Silver:
I
stopped reading at "Went to a Travis Tritt concert once".
[9:59
AM] Mr. Brown:
I
had no choice. It was my mother's idea.
[10:00
AM] Mr. Silver:
She
still makes him wear the "I <3 Big Tritties" t-shirt to
family functions.
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