Wednesday, August 3, 2016

365a - Charles Dickens' "An IT Support Call Carol", "A Pittsburgh Drinking Company", (sings) "Hello? Is It Me You're Looking Floor?", Dangerous Medicines, Press The Soviet Button, and Pap Pap's PU Paw Paws

[11:02 AM] Ms. Rose:

Guess who I just got on chat! Dickens on Ebenezer St. LOL

[11:04 AM] Mr. Blue:

lol

[11:29 AM] Mr. Silver:
"I am the Ghost of IT Past."
"Long past?"
"No, your past.  Come back with me to when you were young.  Do not fear being observed, these are but shadows."
"LOOK!  It's me, as a boy!  I'm downloading 'Samantha Fox Strip Poker' on a 150 baud modem to a C-64!  Oh those were magic days!"
[11:29 AM] Ms. Rose:

Haha

[11:31 AM] Mr. Silver:
Editor's note, this scene is partly based in reality...
:)
I did have a C-64...I did borrow a 150 baud modem.  But Samantha Fox's game was actually included with the set of disks I got with the computer.
Ultra-grainy monochrome pictures of her mostly clothed that didn't always load without crashing was not a highlight discovery.
[11:34 AM] Mr. Blue:

Log in! And know me better man!”

[11:36 AM] Mr. Silver:
"What is it?  It tastes lovely!" 
"It is the milk of unlimited high-speed broadband, and you have clearly never tasted it before."
"My brothers told me all about you, you miserable excuse for a man."
"I can't say as I've met any of them."
"I daresay not."
"How many brothers do you have?"
"How many bits in a byte?"
"...twenty-four and a thousand."
"Then I have twenty-three and a thousand brothers!"



[11:41 AM] Mr. Silver:
When I was a repair guy we got a call to Pittsburgh Brewing.  The boss sent 4 of us...bit confused by that but it was to be "good experience" for me and Mr. Pig-Iron. 
So we stood around while one of the veterans talked and one of the other guys fixed.
And with a hearty "Thanks a lot!", they loaded the car with 6 cases of beer for us.
"Ooooohhhhh...ok."
Hehehe
[11:44 AM] Ms. Rose:

Nice. I used to live right across from Iron City brewery. It was rumored that most of the employees were crocked 24/7 and I can confirm that they gave out free beer on the tours.

[11:45 AM] Mr. Brown:

Yeah, I always wondered about breweries

Looks like they always drinking

[11:50 AM] Mr. Silver:
Oddly enough, hobbyist brewers do too.
Rarely been to a session where we didn't end up drinking more than we were making.
[11:51 AM] Mr. Brown:

I mean, all the Sam Adams commercials are the employees drinking

Hey! Buy our beer, it tastes good cause, we drink while we make it!”

[11:53 AM] Mr. Silver:
"We...urp...test for quolor and hops...and...um...quality! From the moment we get up at 1:30 in the afternoon til last call...uh...at the end of the work day."
[11:54 AM] Ms. Rose:

Dammit, Henry! *hic* You passed out again while roasting the barley! Now we have to call it "special reserve *hic* dark."

[11:55 AM] Mr. Brown:

"Henry, every Oct-oboer, you drop a damn - pumpkin pie in the vat"

"An we have to call it pumkin beer"

[11:59 AM] Mr. Silver:
One of my few set-piece jokes seems appropriate:
When Mrs. Flanagan saw Mitch and Danny coming up the walk, she knew it was bad news.
"We're sorry ma'am, but Flanagan fell into a beer vat today.  He's drowned."
"Ah he didn't!  He didn't!  Tell me, did he suffer long?"
"Well, there is that.  Before he went under he'd got out three times to piss."
[12:01 PM] Ms. Rose:

Bwwahahaha!

[12:01 PM] Mr. Blue:

lol

[12:12 PM] Mr. Brown:

Kinda like “Beerfest”

[12:13 PM] Mr. Silver:
Mmm?
Got my version from a not-even-close-to-PC Irish/Arab joke book in the 70s
[12:14 PM] Ms. Rose:

There's a scene in “Beerfest” where a dude drinks his way out of a GIANT vat of beer.

[12:15 PM] Mr. Brown:

He did not drink his way out

He tried too

[12:15 PM] Ms. Rose:

Spoiler alert!

[12:16 PM] Mr. Silver:
Like in "Strange Brew"
Except with success.
"Oh jeez I gotta take a leak so bad I can taste it!"
[12:54 PM] Ms. Rose:

Ha! Haven't seen that in forever.

[12:55 PM] Mr. Silver:
I've never seen all of it together in one go.
[12:55 PM] Mr. Brown:

What is that?

[12:55 PM] Mr. Silver:
"Strange Brew"
Bob McKenzie is trapped in a tank filling with beer and decides to only way to survive is to drink it all.
[12:56 PM] Mr. Brown:

I watched the whole thing but cannot remember much of it

lol



(The following unedited Mr. Brown...yadda yadda... - Mr. Silver)
[12:58 PM] Mr. Brown:

crap so a pictuer of linole richy

now i have " HELLO IS S ME YOUR LOOKING FOR "

running through my head

[12:59 PM] Mr. Blue:

Linoleum Richie

[12:59 PM] Mr. Brown:

lol

[12:59 PM] Ms. Rose:

Hahahaha


I heard Linoleum Richie did a side project with Plank Williams and Jim Morrison of The Floors.

[1:02 PM] Mr. Blue:

heheheh



[1:11 PM] Mr. Blue:

Apparently the medicine cabinets are going away because people downstairs are abusing them

Like immediately after being filled, they're emptied by agents. lol

[1:12 PM] Mr. Silver:
For a floor of people who horde ice for no apparent reason and complain for more, for some reason this is hardly surprising to me.
Which brings us to me leaving yesterday.
[1:13 PM] Ms. Rose:

You mean you guys don't eat 48 Tylenol and chase it down with a bottle of hand sanitizer?

[1:13 PM] Mr. Blue:

Harlan was saying that things were disappearing frequently that had no business disappearing...like arm slings

[1:14 PM] Mr. Silver:
On the way out I took a side turn to talk Kids In The Hall with Mr. Blue and then around to tell Ned that a closing piece of BS we'd worked on was done...
And I'm walking past Jack, and he's trying to get a clear plastic hobby case...like for beads or whatever...shoved into his desk drawer. Every chamber packed with inch and a half paper packets.
"Hiding your paraphernalia and...other..eh?"
"Don't know what you’re talking about.  (shove shove)"
"SURE you do...I've seen it on TEE-vee and online.  They look just like them there heroin papers."
"Nonsense!"
(Zach walks up) "Just walk away, man..."
"Hehehe..."
(Zach) "How long do you think you have til retirement, eh?"
"Apparently til this afternoon in the alley, as I walk to my car. :-D "



[12:29 PM] Ms. Rose:

Every time I think of (area), I mentally picture a nuclear fallout zone with babushka ladies shivering in the cold and fighting for bread.

[12:30 PM] Mr. Blue:

lol

The Forbidden Zone

The Wasteland

[12:30 PM] Mr. Silver:
I picture the same, but they're fighting over Starbucks and the like.
[12:31 PM] Ms. Rose:

"Please call 1-800-PUTIN to be ignored by a different entity."

[12:33 PM] Mr. Silver:
"If you need service, press 1.”
If you have a complaint, press 1.“
If you wish to report a traitor, press 1."
...
...
Comrade Rose, you are wasting the People's time.  Please press 1."
[12:34 PM] Ms. Rose:

LOL
[12:34 PM] Mr. Silver:
"... put down the coffee and press 1 please ... waiting will offer no other options."
(beeep)
"That was a 5, but thank you...a representative has been dispatched to your location. How may we assist you, random anonymous comrade?"



[9:09 AM] Mr. Brown:

Oh! So Mr. Silver, have you ever eaten a paw paw?

My pap got me some paw paws.

[9:11 AM] Mr. Silver:
Pap Pap's paw paws, huh?
Not that I recall, no
[9:12 AM] Mr. Brown:

I've never had them either

I'm just waiting for them to get ripe to try them

My dad says they taste like banana pudding 

[9:14 AM] Mr. Silver:
...and knowing how much I like that...
I'd try one as a curiosity but it doesn't bode well

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