12:57
PM Mr. Brown
Cool
1:01
PM Mr. Silver
That’s
the second Hoffa “aging-mobster” tip in this past year.
1:17
PM Mr. Blue
Why
are they still looking for him?
1:18
PM Mr. Silver
Why
are they still looking for Nazis?
1:18
PM Mr. Blue
Because
they're still alive.
1:19
PM Mr. Silver
I
had a brief chat about this with Mr. Mustard.
They
caught a Nazi living in the US last week.
1:22
PM Mr. Silver
I'm
looking at it and thinking "It’s not really confirmed, but he
probably did bad stuff…while in a war...for a few years until the war ended when he was 26. He's
kept his nose clean and has most probably been a productive non-atrocity-committing person
for 68 years. He's 94. Almost all of his contemporaries that survived, and
even the majority of their kids, are long dead. Maybe...just maybe...we could let
it slide."
1:23
PM Mr. Blue
It’s
not like people were jumping for joy to join the SS
Most
were conscripted, most were just following orders. If they
hadn't followed orders they would have been imprisoned or killed.
1:24
PM Mr. Silver
The clear
difference is that no war crimes or atrocities were perpetrated by
any American, French, British, Russian or other allied troops
during WWII.
...
(SNERK!)
Haha!
Sorry!
1:25
PM Mr. Blue
Right!
The
question then becomes: "if your orders are to commit heinous
crimes, how culpable are you if you follow them?" Well,
based on what our own soldiers did in places like Vietnam and Iraq
and Afghanistan by just 'following orders', apparently not at all
culpable.
12:37
PM Mr. Silver
"Depardieu
Nearing Completion of Drunk Bucket List"
12:38
PM Mr. Amethyst
lol
12:38
PM Mr. Gray
LOL
12:39
PM Mr. Silver
"His
shortlist includes falling into pigsty while chugging a bottle of Cabernet, and peeing on a president, monarch, or prime minister."
12:50
PM Mr. Brown
Depardieu
is somebody to party with, like Rick James
12:51
PM Mr. Amethyst
Depardieu,
Johnny Depp and I walk into a bar…
12:51
PM Mr. Silver
Fall...fall
into a bar.
12:52
PM Mr. Amethyst
Oh...
Yea… Well, you know. LOL
12:52
PM Mr. Silver
If
you're gonna tell these stories, details count.
12:52
PM Mr. Brown
Well,
to get it completely right:
Depardieu
and you fall into a bar, and Depp walked into the wall until he found
the door.
12:53
PM Mr. Silver
He
has a point, Mr. Amethyst. Rewrites are in order.
Mr.
Silver
So...3
lessons from yesterday.
Starting
with #3...someone in my neighborhood is panic prone.
12:56
PM Mr. Amethyst
Mrs.
Amethyst?
Wait.
Go
on.
12:57
PM Mr. Silver
I
fear it may cost me money, but we'll see.
12:59
PM Mr. Blue
Why?
1:01
PM Mr. Silver
Lesson
#2 - Anyone that puts out a full web article explaining how short-rib
meat makes the best steak for grilling in the world and writes it
eloquently enough to trick me into trying it needs to be sat down in
front of a real steak so he can experience what food tastes like.
1:02
PM Mr. Brown
LOL
1:08
PM Mr. Silver
I
don't throw out beef lightly.
Even
if the cut is a disaster, you can usually make something of
it.
But
of the 3 pieces, 1 3/4 is bagged in the fridge waiting for garbage
night.
1:09
PM Mr. Silver
So...lesson
#1
1:10
PM Mr. Silver
While
enjoying a beer and enjoying a relaxing fire in your backyard chiminea, don't
put in a large cardboard tube.
1:11
PM Mr. Blue
What’d
the cardboard tube do?
1:13
PM Mr. Silver
Smoked
for 2-4 minutes until it hit flashpoint and burned normally. Long enough for the
neighbor in lesson #3 to call the fire dept.
1:14
PM Mr. Blue
Nice.
1:14
PM Mr. Silver
Who
arrived in the neighborhood and had to search all over for the deadly
inferno which was long gone.
However
I was told that every time you have a fire like this, you have to get
a permit.
I
was in total compliance except a signature and a tube.
The
spokesman even tested the heat against my fence "That's too
close! Wait… No... Nevermind."
1:20
PM Mr. Blue
So
if you burn tubes you need a permit, or if you have a chiminea thing
you need a permit?
1:20
PM Mr. Silver
If
you have a “recreational fire” in town.
1:20
PM Mr. Amethyst
Who
told you that?
If
you go on the local website, it says a recreational fire after 5:30pm
requires no permit.
1:21
PM Mr. Silver
The
fireman in my back yard mentioned it.
1:21
PM Mr. Amethyst
He's
retarded.
I
burn all the time.
Oh
wait...maybe I'm township.
1:22
PM Mr. Silver
Probably.
Anyway, he said it wasn't a big deal, really. Safe area,
regulation seasoned wood. Properly attended. Hose in
range.
1:23
PM Mr. Amethyst
Nice.
1:23
PM Mr. Silver
But,
get a permit next time and no cardboard tubes.
1:23
PM Mr. Amethyst
LOL
1:23
PM Mr. Silver
"Well,
it was the only one I had."
"What
was it?"
"Big
one from a butcher paper roll."
"Ah.
I do need your name address and phone for the record."
"K,
come on in."
Mrs
Silver - "Sweetie? I'm stuck on this game."
"I'm
busy with the fire department."
MS
- "Where are they?"
"In
the house, Sweetie...in the kitchen."
"Evening,
ma'am."
MS
- "Augh!"
So...
I'm
wondering if Lesson #3 is going to get me nailed with a nice big
'False Alarm' fine even though the guy told me all was cool. And how
bitter I'll get to be considering I know there's other firepits in
the neighborhood and they don't get calls.
(or
permits)
1:30
PM Mr. Blue
I
doubt it. It's not your fault some idiot called the fire department
for no reason.
1:30
PM Mr. Amethyst
Mhm.
My
neighbors know better.
1:30
PM Mr. Blue
I’m
guessing your neighbor isn't paranoid as much as he's a dick that
doesn't like smoke.
1:31
PM Mr. Silver
There
was no wind; its not like it was blowing on them.
1:32
PM Mr. Blue
It's
(town).
1:33
PM Mr. Amethyst
^
1:33
PM Mr. Blue
When
I was 6, I was playing catch in someone's back yard with a Nerf ball
and it rolled into the neighbor's yard and they called the police.
1:33
PM Mr. Silver
I've
seen full blown conflagrations ignored in this town.
1:36
PM Mr. Silver
Gray,
Green and I drove past 12' tall walls of orange fire and black
smoke across from the convenience store on the south side of town.
Super busy time of day. We saw no one in attendance or even
watching. It filled the sky with smoke that was visible from the
other side of town. Not a peep from the fire department.
1:41
PM Mr. Silver
Another
time, opposite end of town, I saw a guy's woodpile burning hotly and
working up to a huge blaze. I pulled over to get out to warn
them since it was under trees and right next to the house. He hadn't
seen it til I pointed it out so it couldn't be a hoax, and he saw me
get out of the car, so I obviously hadn't set it. Reaction? The guy
talked to me like I was intruding on his private business.
1:41
PM Mr. Amethyst
LOL
1:41
PM Mr. Silver
(back
in the car) Mrs Silver - "What did he say?"
"He
was an asshole. I
hope
his house burns down."
1:43
PM Mr. Blue
Maybe
he had a permit.
1:43
PM Mr. Amethyst
LOL
Thank
you, Mr Blue. Got me laughing!
1:43
PM Mr. Blue
Hahaha
1:46
PM Mr. Silver
LOL!
Mr.
Silver
Morning
9:10
AM Mr. Amethyst
Mrning
9:23
AM Mr. Silver
Not
a single o was given...
9:24
AM Mr. Amethyst
LMFA-
Miss
Amethyst met her first snake yesterday.
9:24
AM Mr. Silver
Did
she go all Hercules on it?
9:25
AM Mr. Amethyst
She
grabbed a log off the wood pile and there was a 3 ft watersnake. It
was rather large and struck at her; he didn’t make it after he
struck at me.
9:28
AM Mr. Silver
Yup...what
did it expect, eh?
9:28
AM Mr. Amethyst
Yeah.
LOL
9:31
AM Mr. Silver
"Hiss!
Stay away from me, pink frilly giant! Stay aw-HOLY CRAP IT'S A
BIGGER ONE (splatch)"
9:32
AM Mr. Amethyst
Hahahaha
I
felt bad but he wouldn’t leave. It kept following me around and
striking. I’ve never seen a snake go after something that’s my
size instead of trying to get away.
9:34
AM Mr. Silver
You
missed the "Hey guys, watch this" he hissed to the other
snakes giggling in the woodpile.
9:35
AM Mr. Amethyst
Right
Mr.
Gray
Looks
like a Chinese crested to me. They are all ugly.
3:34
PM Mr. Silver
What's
wrong with Walle?
3:35
PM Mr. Gray
I
don’t see it. Rascal is far uglier.
3:35
PM Mr. Silver
Walle
is the most normal looking one I've seen so far, and he won.
3:35
PM Mr. Gray
3:35
PM Mr. Silver
"World's
Ugliest Dog: Blind Judges Edition"
3:42
PM Mr. Silver
Sorry...Walle
is just not ugly.
There's
a much uglier one in my neighborhood.
It's
a mutt mix of a toy poodle, and a Welsh marsh tick, and a Vietnamese
“blech”.
3:43
PM Mr. Amethyst
I
didn't read blech. I thought that said “bitch”.
3:44
PM Mr. Silver
This
dog is about the size and consistency of a loaf of bread.
It's
vaguely egg-shaped with the point forward and the round end in back.
It
has stubby little legs and a goat tail.
A
rat head with poodle ears.
And
the overall fur effect is that it's body is made of soft white foam with
curls of balding old-man hair and fuzz that looks glued on. Its
like the shape was coated with Elmer's Glue, and then the dog was
dropped into a box of hair, and then it was all roughly patted down
flat to the body.
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