Day 154 - Your PC Wants The Funk, Suspicious Beasts Of Nature, Deliveries By Appointment To His Majesty King Burger, The Tan 8, Mr. Mustard Never Tells What He's Having For Lunch, and The Things That Make The Kids Of Today Tic,

10:21 AM Mr. Silver

"Are there lights on the case?" 

"I can't tell...I can't get down."

"Put some Parliament Funkadelic on...that always gets me bopping." 

10:46 AM Mr. Blue

LOL

11:33 AM Mr. Blue

Definitely one of the weirdest looking terrestrial animals on the planet. 

http://www.google.com/search?q=dhole&rls=com.microsoft:en-us&oe=UTF-8&startIndex=&startPage=1&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=u0UYT76qMsLY0QHqspDdCw&biw=1025&bih=465&sei=wkUYT_2sB6rg0QGcw7mYCw#um=1&hl=en&rls=com.microsoft:en-us&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=tibetan+fox&oq=tibetan+fox&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=2761l4087l0l4212l11l6l0l0l0l0l0l0ll0l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=3d723842be101963&biw=1025&bih=465 

Every picture of it looks Photoshopped.

11:35 AM Mr. Silver

The rare Clint-Eastwoodian Squinting Fox.

11:35 AM Mr. Blue

LOL

"Tibetan Smug Fox"

11:37 AM Mr. Silver

Vulpis Iseewhatyoudidus.

11:37 AM Mr. Blue

Hehehe

"Hey God, where should we put this pouty, squinty fox?"

"How about Asia?"

11:39 AM Mr. Silver

"The Tibetan fox is a skilled predator as long its prey is near enough for the fox to make it out clearly."

11:42 AM Mr. Blue

The hammerhead bat

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&rls=com.microsoft:en-us&q=hypsignathus+monstrosus&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=2608l3607l0l3779l11l2l0l9l9l1l172l328l0.2l7l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&biw=1025&bih=465&wrapid=tlif132699133339410&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=6EcYT820MauB0QHm2vzXCw 

11:43 AM Mr. Silver

It looks like a moose, not a hammer.

11:43 AM Mr. Blue

Yeah, it does.

11:44 AM Mr. Silver

"See Clive Barker's new horror film, set in sleepy backwoods Massachusetts."

"Batmoose!"

11:44 AM Mr. Blue

http://www.zang.no/Media/PAP/Bilder/pictsite/flaggermus/hypsignathus-monstrosus.jpg 

It’s wearing a mask.

11:45 AM Mr. Silver

heh

Uglty bastage.

11:45 AM Mr. Blue

It probably has inner beauty.

Oh, it spreads Ebola. Never mind.

11:47 AM Mr. Silver

Hmm...this “Batmoose” story is gaining depth...

"Your mother taught you to fear rabies, but she never warned you about the foul pestilence of the Batmoose!" 

11:50 AM Mr. Blue

"Medical professionals specifically trained to handle Terror will be on hand during the guano scene."

11:51 AM Mr. Silver

If Jimmy Durante had been tapped to play Batman...

"I am da terra dat stalks da night-a!  Hot-cha-cha-cha!"

11:52 AM Mr. Blue

LOL

1:33 PM Mr. Silver

So, Burger King is thinking of doing deliveries in the USA.

1:44 PM Mr. Silver

That seems rather...insane...

1:45 PM Mr. Brown

I like Burger King.

1:46 PM Mr. Silver

Yes, but would you order in?

1:46 PM Mr. Brown

Yes, if they delivered to as far away as I am from them.

1:47 PM Mr. Blue

Why would they deliver?

With gas prices, how could they turn a profit?

Can they deliver me a small order of fries?

1:48 PM Mr. Brown

They’d have to have a minimum order and a delivery fee, just like pizza shops.

1:53 PM Mr. Silver

The article said something about it being a last untapped market.

I mean besides "At sea" and "Antarctica" and the like.

I don't really feel like tipping a driver for what are old fries 1/2 the time delivered right at the counter.

Though a fryer in a delivery car would be quite amusing.

"Here we go sir...3 whopper combos.  Here's the drinks…

(ding!)

“And I'll be back with the fries in just a moment...they just came up."

2:00 PM Mr. Brown

Mobile fryers would mean a lot of extra insurance money.

2:02 PM Mr. Silver

But spectacular entertainment when the delivery drivers hit the brakes too hard at a stop.

Mr. Mustard

This employee wants his profile name to be “thetan8”.

I thought it was “The Tan 8” not “Thetan 8”

And I, uh, guessed the wrong gender too. 

1:57 PM Mr. Silver

Thetan, eh?

Hmmm

1:58 PM Mr. Mustard

I’m not sure if it is a Greek god, a fraternity…

1:58 PM Mr. Silver

Scientologist

1:58 PM Mr. Mustard

Okay.  Thank you. 

I thought it was a Sun worshiper of the 8th level or something.

2:00 PM Mr. Silver

I would recommend, even with corrections, pronouncing it "The Tan 8" over and over during the profile setup. 

2:01 PM Mr. Silver

And after he gets steamed about it say, "There's no such thing as Thetans."

2:17 PM Mr. Blue

Hehehe

2:24 PM Mr. Silver

Any likelihood that Mr. Mustard is actually a cannibal?  It’s the majority of what we chat about.

    Mr. Mustard

    “Investigators will continue to beat the brush along a winding hiking trail on Thursday to see

    if they can find more body parts.”  They like long pork.

   11:41 AM Mr. Silver

    Part of the "How to find food in the wilderness" course?

   11:42 AM Mr. Mustard

    Hollywood murder case, sorry.

    'The Long Pork Cold Case!'

    Sounds like a shampoo ad. “Head and Shoulders”.

    11:46 AM Mr. Silver

    The Long Pork Cold Case sounds like the deli counter in tribal New Guinea.

    11:46 AM Mr. Mustard

    True

    11:47 AM Mr. Silver

     "And a pound of head cheese." 

     "Yes, ma'am."

    11:48 AM Mr. Mustard

     Now you are making me hungry.

     11:49 AM Mr. Silver

     Hehe

2:29 PM Mr. Brown

Umm, he has a white van.

He could fit a lot of bodies in there.

LOL

2:29 PM Mr. Silver

No windows?

2:30 PM Mr. Brown

Just in the front.

2:30 PM Mr. Silver

(Squints suspiciously, like a Tibetan fox)

Mr. Blue

http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/health/girls-mysteriously-developed-tourette-like-symptoms-suffering-mass-hysteria-doctor-article-1.1008300

2:47 PM Mr. Silver

(Images of South Park episode...)

2:48 PM Mr. Brown

“No, kitty, that's my pot pie!”

2:49 PM Mr. Silver

Nah...the one where Cartman faked having Tourette Syndrome until he actually had Tourettes.

2:50 PM Mr. Brown

I think parents don't understand how much stress teens are under nowadays.

2:50 PM Mr. Silver

I agree.

Kids in general, really.

2:51 PM Mr. Brown

I know I was under a lot of stress.

Stress physically hurts you.

I know that's why I started having my anxiety attacks.

2:52 PM Mr. Silver

I mean, sure...not a lot of factory floor death in preteen years, viking raiders and parents selling one to slavers at the moment...but still...

2:54 PM Mr. Brown

I wish I would have had Zoloft back in high school. It probably would have helped me out a lot.

2:58 PM Mr. Blue

I guess it's all relative; certainly our stress levels and causes aren't like past generations'.

2:58 PM Mr. Blue

But when our stress is high that's all we know: it's high.

Just like people 1000 years from now might be living relatively easy lives, but they'll still have stress, even if they end up manufacturing reasons for it.

3:00 PM Mr. Brown

But it's the external stress that everybody puts on each other that is the issue:

your ugly your stupid your fat

Making them think about useless stuff that has no real meaning.

3:02 PM Mr. Silver

Like "You can't choose the correct 'you're'!"

3:02 PM Mr. Brown

LOL

3:04 PM Mr. Silver

Unless...like...you keep ugly, stupid and fat at home in jars or something.