Friday, May 2, 2014

Day 291 - The Leaning Tower Of Tarentum, "He's Poparm The Synthol Man! (Shoo-shoot!)", "Hype-N-Fall Addicts", Don't Make Fun Of Vlad Tepes's Accent, and A Black Belt In Medicine

9:11 AM Mr. Blue
The leaning tower of Tarentum.
9:14 AM Mr. Silver
Let's save that building!
Tarentum needs the tourism!
We'll set up pictures of people doing this stuff!
9:17 AM Mr. Blue
Heh
I want to go to Pisa and take a picture of me giving the finger to all the people pretending to be leaning into it.
Why make it seem like you're holding it up?
Why not make it seem like you're the one pushing it over?
9:20 AM Mr. Silver
The way this building seems to lean, I'm wondering if the proper shtick is to make it look like you are punching it in between the 1st and 2nd floors
(googles)
Yeah, that's it
9:21 AM Mr. Blue
LOL @ the pic with the firefighters
They're Andy Warhol-ing it.
9:21 AM Mr. Silver
Dress as Goku and snap a picture of a flying kick at where it buckles.
9:22 AM Mr. Blue
Heheh
9:22 AM Mr. Silver
Yeah...the firefighters look rather funny in the context of this conversation
(“This morning’s fire/rescue training exercise involved firefighters using their psychic powers to distort buildings”)
Mr. Blue
9:55 AM Mr. Silver
That's what Tarentum needs.
9:56 AM Mr. Amethyst
A cute chick kicking down buildings?
9:57 AM Mr. Silver
Yes.
9:57 AM Mr. Amethyst
I support this idea.
9:58 AM Mr. Silver
We could meme her: Kick Girl
Have her kick all kinds of stuff.
9:58 AM Mr. Amethyst
I’d meme her once or twice.



Mr. Brown
Dumb ass.
10:14 AM Mr. Silver
(Sings) "I'm strong to da finish, 'cause I inject a lethal cocktail-ich!"
10:15 AM Mr. Blue
What's the point of having big arms that don't look remotely like muscle?
Also, Popeye had big forearms. Syntholers don't.
10:16 AM Mr. Silver
He can do that base jumping thing without a wingsuit with those. 
10:17 AM Mr. Blue
Also, the Zyzz guy on his t-shirt died of steroid use.
10:18 AM Mr. Brown
His old photos looked better.  “Come here!  Let me give you a black eye when I hug you!”
10:20 AM Mr. Silver
“Zyzz - Veni Vidi Morti”



Mr. Silver
" "Most addictive game ever!" says our correspondent, who started playing it yesterday with everyone else, is 12, and who previously gave the same review to Flappy Bird and Candy Crush"
11:24 AM Mr. Silver
"He has also apparently never played a computer game that had potions, scrolls or similar one use items, as he calls these "twists", as if they are innovative in a community that has been using similar game elements since the 70s."
11:25 AM Mr. Amethyst
lol
12:02 PM Mr. Silver
Nothing but the title of the article suggests it has any addictive qualities.
12:35 PM Mr. Yellow
I can list a host of games I would find more addictive
One would be “Genghis Khan”
I played that for two straight days once.
12:36 PM Mr. Yellow
And still, my roommate and I had only conquered half of China each and quit because we were exhausted.
12:36 PM Mr. Green
“Master of Magic”!
12:37 PM Mr. Yellow
Yes!  A shorter game, but I always played all the way through.
“Baldur’s Gate”. An entire weekend with Ron watching me play; it was that addictive he just watched me play the whole weekend.



Mr. Brown
You know how when somebody makes fun of Dracula, they do the “bla bla bla” thing?
They are definitely not doing a real thing, because he never says that, but they are making fun of the Romanian accent.
9:26 AM Mr. Blue
Dracula is Romanian
9:29 AM Mr. Silver
The bla bla came from bad/broad imitations of Bela Lugosi's version.
It is always done in his voice.
9:32 AM Mr. Brown
Right.
9:32 AM Mr. Silver
IMO, even Oldman's characterization tried to imitate Lugosi a little.
Meanwhile, I've never heard a Christopher Lee “Bla blah-bla”.
9:32 AM Mr. Brown
I’m going to suck your bla bla blad.
It was a poor Romanian accent to start with.
9:33 AM Mr. Blue
Lugosi is from Romania, so it makes sense to imitate him.
(Actually a part of Hungary that is now Romania...but seriously...close enough – Mr. Silver)
9:33 AM Mr. Brown
Oh, he is?
Then he really Romanianed it up.
9:33 AM Mr. Blue
He hammed up the role, but I think his accent is just how he talked.
I mean, he didn't float around glaring at people and whipping his cape around,
but yeah, he spoke in a Romanian accent.
9:37 AM Mr. Silver
I'm sure his accent was from 1st hand knowledge of Romanian aristocratic speaking. 
He certainly didn't use it in all his films.
Not that he ever had an American twang or anything, but his "clearly foreign scientist" characters weren't "Dracula".
9:39 AM Mr. Blue
I’ll have to read up on the casting of Lugosi.
It’s kind of weird how they happened to get someone actually from Transylvania.
9:40 AM Mr. Brown
Well, they knew the history of the real Dracula.
So probably went for authenticity.
9:41 AM Mr. Silver
Pfft...Hollywood research in those days?
They got him because he was such a sensation performing Dracula on stage.
9:41 AM Mr. Silver
Hollywood clearly didn’t consider the “real history” of Dracula for “Dracula”.
Vlad Tepes is a national hero there, you know
9:42 AM Mr. Silver
Their extremely violent George Washington.
How different would U.S. history have been...
"General Washington, the British have surrendered.  What should we do with their commanders and the prisoners."
9:44 AM Mr. Brown
“Put their heads on spits?”
9:44 AM Mr. Silver
"Impale them on stakes outside of Boston."
"Yes General!"
9:46 AM Mr. Silver
(pacing, exasperated) "Heads...heads are so…static.  No, there's nothing like dining to the sound of living men expiring slowly, stuck on the top of 8' tall spikes.  On that note, what is the cook planning for this evening, corporal?"
10:06 AM Mr. Blue
Later that year, in 1459, Ottoman Sultan Mehmed II sent envoys to Vlad to urge him to pay a delayed tribute[6] of 10,000 ducats and 500 recruits into the Ottoman forces. Vlad refused, because if he had paid the 'tribute', as the tax was called at the time, it would have meant a public acceptance of Wallachia as part of the Ottoman Empire. Vlad, just like most of his predecessors and successors, had as a primary goal to keep Wallachia as independent as possible. Vlad had the Turkish envoys killed on the pretext that they had refused to raise their "hats" to him, by nailing their turbans to their heads.
LOL!  A lot like the envoy that the Mongolians sent to Japan.
"Hey dude… uhh… our boss sent us to ask for some money, and... uhh." 
"Have these idiots killed at once."
10:20 AM Mr. Blue
The amount of stakes you'd need to fashion in order to impale 20,000 people alone is a marvel.
10:20 AM Mr. Silver
I like the tale of Vlad putting out one of his bejeweled gold cups for people to use at a public fountain.  No one was stupid enough to steal it.
10:22 AM Mr. Blue
Heh, I never heard that.
10:22 AM Mr. Brown
That shows pure respect for a pimp.
10:23 AM Mr. Silver
There was also the merchant he bought something from and short-changed him a couple coins.
The merchant decided to let it slide.
Bad move...
Vlad had done it on purpose to see if the merchant would be honest/man enough to call him on it.
Gaak!
10:23 AM Mr. Blue
Nice.
10:31 AM Mr. Silver
(Ambassadors) "Psst - Never accept an invitation to one of Vlad’s 'steak dinners'.  Shh...He’s here..."
Vlad "Hello boys!  Welcome to the castle!  Say, I’m famished: either of you up for some chicken on a spit?"
"Uh...  Sure!  Yes!"
Vlad "Great!  Guards...impale these fine fellows on the spits and get the cook to fry me up some chicken."
“Crap..."
Vlad “Walked right into it, you know. (winks)”
“Yeah…”
10:41 AM Mr. Blue
“He roasted children, whom he fed to their mothers. And (he) cut off the breasts of women, and forced their husbands to eat them. After that, he had them all impaled.”
Nobody RSVPed to any of Vlad's party invitations.
11:02 AM Mr. Silver
No...  It usually ended up just him, left with a lot of food and decorations.



11:51 AM Mr. Blue
So I’m supposed to go to "Brookland Medical Arts"
What the heck are medical “arts”?
11:51 AM Mr. Brown
Anything that has to do with medicine.
LOL
The arts of medicine.
12:00 PM Mr. Silver
(Commercial opens, doctor appears with a Kiai shout, Yin Yang headband and dual-wielded scalpels.)
"Booker Medical Arts!  We will defeat your illness!"
"Gastrointestinal issues?!" (snap kick to patient's stomach)
"Erectile dysfunction?!" (spin kick to groin)
12:02 PM Mr. Blue
"We’ll remove that appendix and make the scar look like the Chinese symbol for peace!"
12:02 PM Mr. Silver
"Heart disease?!"  (bare hand thrust under ribcage, pulls out still beating heart)
12:03 PM Mr. Blue
LOL
You went in a different direction than I had pictured.
"Uhh doc, you didn't actually remove my tumor.  You just painted a forest scene on it." 
"Yep."
12:05 PM Mr. Silver
Ah...you mean the Bob Ross Medical Arts.
"Now...let's soften the almighty coronary by putting in a happy little bypass.  You'll want your #2 palette knife. Take a bit of cadmium red...and take just a touch of burnt orange along the edge..."
at

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