[2:27 PM]
https://allthatsinteresting.com/dyatlov-pass-investigation
Heard about this new investigation but haven't read about it yet
[2:27 PM] Mr. Brown:
yes more investigating
more stuff released
[2:28 PM]
I still think the 3 Yuri's tried and failed to assimilate everyone into the Yuri Collective.
[2:29 PM] Mr. Brown:
lol
Yuri?
No not you. Yuri.
No not you either.
Yes (pointing at small Yuri raising hand) you.
[2:32 PM]
"Igor...I know it sounds kind of crazy but... Wasn't there only one Yuri on the team when we left?"
[2:33 PM] Mr. Brown:
The weather theory is interesting
The way the wind comes around the mountain there making it seem like something bad was coming their way.
they for sure were suffering from hypothermia
that is a given
Just what drove them to it?
[2:34 PM]
According to Wikipedia they were driven to it on a train
and then by truck
The group arrived by train at Ivdel (Ивдель), a town at the centre of the northern province of Sverdlovsk Oblast in the early morning hours of 25 January 1959.[7] They then took a truck to Vizhai (Вижай) – a lorry village that is the last inhabited settlement to the north
(just being a jerk ;) "Just what drove them to it?")
[2:35 PM] Mr. Brown:
HAHAH
did not notice
[2:37 PM]
Looks like one of the Yuris suspiciously quit after one day
There's yer clue
[2:37 PM] Mr. Brown:
Yuri could not handle the Yuri I guess, so Yuri
Lets get back to the group, Yuri
[2:37 PM] Mr. Blue:
a lot of the weirder stuff is either uncorroborated or easily explainable
Like how some were missing eyes or tongue.. just picked off by scavengers
"radiation".. no evidence this was even tested
[2:38 PM] Mr. Brown:
It was a weather issue
caught a bad wind storm forced them out
[2:38 PM] Mr. Blue:
But they were all experienced hikers that knew not to wander out into nowhere
I think someone went nuts.. maybe there was some kind of love triangle and someone got jealous and went nuts and chased them out
[2:37 PM]
On 28 January, one of the members, Yuri Yudin, who suffered from several health ailments (including rheumatism and a congenital heart defect) turned back due to knee and joint pain that made him unable to continue the hike
"Well...my congenital heart defect is acting up..."
"And your rheumatism?"
"Oh! Uh...that too. Anyway. Enjoy the candy the government asked me to give you all as gifts. Just wait a few days first."
Really though...first I've read about Yuri Prime.
Why exactly did he go at all?
[2:41 PM] Mr. Brown:
I got to beat this heart problem. Oh crap, its not working. bye guys!
[2:41 PM]
"Hiker and not-insane-killer Yuri Yuden, pictured here, says he quit on day one, and who could doubt such a face?" 
[2:46 PM]
Mr. Brown:
that guy is so sick
Look at all that rheumatoid
lol
[2:48 PM]
Too weak to continue...yet walked back home all day by himself.
[2:48 PM] Mr. Brown:
Went around the corner, continued to follow the group
I'm gonna kill Yuri
No not that one the other one
No the other one
Ah Hell, I'll kill them all
[2:49 PM]
In 1967, Sverdlovsk writer and journalist Yuri Yarovoi (Russian: Юрий Яровой) published the novel Of the Highest Degree of Complexity,[23] inspired by the incident.
ah HAH!!!!
Another Yuri!
[2:49 PM] Mr. Blue:
Great excuse for when I make plans with someone but then want to break them at the last minute
"hey uhh, I'd love to come bowling but i just realized i have rheumatism and a congenital heart defect."
[2:51 PM] Mr. Brown:
what if Yuri was the first Jason?
Shows back up with hockey mask and machete
lol
or he donned a bear pelt and came back with an axe
The night Yuri took Yuri's vodka
[2:58 PM]
Based on the unexplained massive blunt trauma cases, I'm guessing he usually had a hard time explaining his favorite "Hiking Club"
"That thing must weigh 10 pounds, Yuri. Why not get a regular stick with a strap and a spike on the end like us?"
Yuri - later in life - shows off his favorite old walking stick, preserved in memory of his friends.
[3:05 PM] Mr. Blue:
“Why do they call you 'Cudgel Killer', anyway?”
[3:06 PM] Mr. Brown:
I wonder if the other Yuris had cool nicknames
[3:07 PM]
"One solid hit and this thing can knock the eyes clean out of a wom- ...wolf."
[11:37 AM] Mr. Blue:
Damn, someone scrubbed the MIB wiki
[11:39 AM] Mr. Brown:
Stuff missing?
[11:40 AM] Mr. Blue:
I remember it gave examples of how they looked and acted weird
Like one studied an object like it was the first time he'd seen it... it was just a regular pen or something
[11:46 AM]
Awww
The MiBs scrubbed the MiB page?
[11:47 AM] Mr. Blue:
Heh
Maybe the MiBs have MiBs
[black Cadillac pulls away, another black Cadillac pulls up]
"You know most supposed visits of the purported men in black are never corroborated! Many turn out to be nothing but hoaxes!"
"How do you know we're not just some guys from your town here pulling a prank?"
"Or we could just be regular Jims going about our business, right?”
“Oh, and if you talk, something might happen to you."
[he picks up the cat and inspects it, even sniffing it]
"YOUR planet earth is filled with hoaxers and pranksters."
[11:48 AM]
Maybe the MIBs have a BiB
Boss in Black
[11:48 AM] Mr. Brown:
Boss calls them in to the office "uh so i see on wiki here that we have some descriptions (taps pen) Well it looks like you're going to have to go through concealment training again."
"Idiots! I showed you and explained pens last week"
"Damnit Jerry, you didn't wear your official sunglasses"
[11:52 AM]
"Hi! United States of America Government Water Company. Is the female of the species home?"
[11:53 AM] Mr. Blue:
heh
[11:54 AM] Mr. Brown:
"Hi! This is the USA uh um Fish Inspection. Yes fish. May I talk to the bipedal hunter of the den?"
(MIB looking around the room) "So anyway, you saw nothing because it was swamp gas and Venus. I notice you have a lot of hostages, eh I mean plants around your house. Do they get fed well?"
[11:56 AM] Mr. Blue:
heh
[11:59 AM] Mr. Brown:
Somebody should to a skit where MIBs show up but the alien did not leave yet
They keep trying to distract the home owners so they don't see the alien while telling the alien to get out of there
lol
[12:05 PM]
"Him? He's not there."
(one leans over and whispers) "She's not there...sorry. Males aren't blue. And don't exist."
"I don't appreciate ... her ... stunning my husband and doing whatever she's doing to him with whatever that is."
"He's suffering from mass hysteria."
(other) "Does this household have a history of swamp gas or St. Elmo's Fire?"
[12:21 PM] Mr. Blue:
heh
[1:25 PM]
Right
Unthinkable
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-china-47084374
"In short, we wish to pretend that "China" didn't happen before the revolution. And this so-called Imperial period promotes commercialism and consumerism."
(advisor leans in, whispers)
"Oh that's right, we're an economic superpower now...uh...it promotes...uh...not-socialist core values."
Honestly I never understand what this brand of twerp thinks is gonna happen.
Almost on par with the Christian terrified that a drawing of The Devil will corrupt them.
(government meeting) "There's a problem with "Yanxi Palace". Our studies show a distinct possibility that 100s of millions of our people will suddenly want to go back to an imperial lifestyle where 98% of the people are miserable commoners, and 99% of the remaining live in aristocratic servitude to people that can just have them impoverished or killed if they serve the tea wrong."
"Goodness! Can we see the stats?"
"Yes! (hands over McDonald's napkin) We thought it out over lunch."
[1:57 PM] Mr. Blue:
Yeah, just tell the producers to add in a story arc about some commoner people and make them be constantly covered in animal feces and dying of various diseases
[2:16 PM]
"New hilarious spin-off: 'Yanki Peasants'!"
"What we really need is an experienced rice planter." (audience laughs)
"Look! There's a little old lady bent double. She'll know." (audience giggles)
"Hey, old woman. We need to know what kind of rice this is. Hello? Old lady?"
(beat)
"I'm 22." (audience laughs) "But I've been planting out in the sun since I've been 4." (audiences roars...players must wait before next line.)
[2:20 PM] Mr. Blue:
heh
[2:21 PM]
"Do you know what kind of rice this is...um...young lady?" (laughter)
"Mmmm...no. Something new. Ask one of my 7 children." (audience loses it)
"Wow! 7 children!" (giggles)
"It used to be 10 but three of them died…so I’m doing pretty good!" (audience loses it)
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