Day 315 - The Best Flavor Is Desperation, Artism Spectrum, Monkey Is The Root Of Evil, Mr. Blue's Hunting Grounds Are Endangered, and "The Roaldman Can"

7:13 AM Mr. Silver

I'm off for 3 days of herding campers this weekend.

Naturally, Silver Jr. has been coughing his lungs out for the last few days.

So I should be as happy as I was the last time we did Disney: full recovery for Silver Jr. and me sick the whole trip.

7:17 AM Mr. Green

Oh boy...

7:17 AM Mr. Silver

I don't have symptom one yet...That will wait for when I wake up the day before.

7:22 AM Mr. Brown

Ugh

I hate planning a trip, then a week or couple days before going getting sick.

7:28 AM Mr. Silver

(Scoutmaster to group) "And year after year, everyone says the food there is the BEST!"

7:31 AM Mr. Silver

(me) "It's a subconscious effect of camping...everything tastes awesome camping because your body thinks it's in a deadly situation and is desperate to survive.  But...even if it is good, I'll be sick and won't be able to taste it."

7:33 AM Mr. Silver

Examples -

(Home) "Ugh...this is awful...the beer you added was a mistake.  Way too much salt.  Throw it out."

(Camp) "Man this is great!  The beer really makes it.  Perfect spices.  Give me seconds!"

(Home) "Gotta watch...I'll have a bit of chicken and a salad with the dressing on the side." 

(Camp) "I bet we could wrap bacon around the cheddarwurst!  I'm makin' 3!"

8:06 AM Mr. Amethyst

LOL

Mr. Silver

"Gray"

A camping food tale from the Pennsic War.

We ended up with a camp visitor one evening for a few hours...I’m not sure who he was but the drinks were flowing.

And he told us that he was born without a developed sense of taste and smell.

Yet according to his camp rules, when he drew the chit to cook dinner, there were no trades allowed.

He tried to warn them to no avail.

He made...something...

It was gray.

"What is it?"

"Gray."

"What's it taste like?"

"Gray...I warned you..."

10:07 AM Mr. Blue

Heh

10:07 AM Mr. Silver

"Well...dish it out."

"Later they told me 'Gray' was awesome and they've always wanted me to make it again, but really it's not possible."

8:51 AM Mr. Blue

This agent keeps calling her son "artistic".

8:52 AM Mr. Silver

Perhaps he is?

8:53 AM Mr. Blue

Maybe.

8:53 AM Mr. Silver

"All that noise and strange talk?  He's working on a set piece about balloons as a metaphor for our relationship to our smart phones."

8:53 AM Mr. Blue

Heheh

7:07 AM Mr. Silver

I'm thinking, in retrospect, that the Buddhist monk idea of my teens was really the right choice.

7:08 AM Mr. Amethyst

LOL

7:11 AM Mr. Silver

Stress from kid, cat, dog, wife, money, house, car, tech, noise, idiots, so-called business...all skipped.

The other option was hermit but I like the occasional conversation.

7:16 AM Mr. Brown

Ok, so I thought that when he said money, he said monkey.

LOL

So I backtracked. “Mr. Silver has monkey issues?”

7:19 AM Mr. Silver

And occasionally bathing...

Don't get me started on the monkey issues...

Mr. Blue

Oh no. The Bon Ton is closing.

11:15 AM Mr. Amethyst

Mr. Blue, you almost had an incoming grappling hook.

11:16 AM Mr. Blue

LOL

Of the department stores at the mall I usually preferred the Bon Ton.

11:18 AM Mr. Brown

Bon Ton Gone

11:19 AM Mr. Silver

Mr. Amethyst be fair...perhaps he liked it for stalking girls.

11:20 AM Mr. Brown

Hmm. I forget what's in the Bon Ton.

11:21 AM Mr. Silver

Tons of bon...

11:22 AM Mr. Blue

I’d rather the X Mall fail and go back to downtown being the shopping destination.

11:22 AM Mr. Brown

To keep this place going?

11:22 AM Mr. Silver

The Y Mall failed years ago.

Pittsburgh Mills already is.

11:23 AM Mr. Brown

I guess people just don't like malls too much anymore. They just go to Walmart.

11:23 AM Mr. Blue

Some malls are doing really well.

It seems to depend on the mall.

Like...Ross Park is booming and probably always will.

11:23 AM Mr. Brown

Location location location

11:24 AM Mr. Blue

Probably Monroeville Mall too.

I’m glad malls are closing, though. They kill central business districts.

11:24 AM Mr. Blue

I never went inside Pittsburgh Mills... It always seemed like a bad location though. I just went to the theater.

11:28 AM Mr. Silver

It is a nice mall that started going the way of all tax write-offs.

It started out faboo and now there's empty sections all over.

The layout hurt it too.

11:30 AM Mr. Silver

Its built in 3 joined ovals for travel.  There are sections that are just dead. It's long, and my impression is that after too much failed in a section, everything else did because no one went "back there" anymore.

11:30 AM Mr. Blue

Ahh

11:40 AM Mr. Blue

I always have dreams about malls.

I used to be weirdly interested in them.

11:40 AM Mr. Silver

Well, you are an architecture/city plan guy.

And an enclosed mall is a miniature city under a roof.

Mr. Brown

Did you ever see The Rifleman?

Its a TV show.

1:04 PM Mr. Blue

No

1:09 PM Mr. Silver

(Sings) "Who can take a rifle...

Head up to a rooooof...

Load it up with ammo, make a noggin shot or two?

The Rifleman...

The Rifleman can..."

1:11 PM Mr. Blue

"The Rifleman can because he mixes lead with blood and makes you run for the woods."

1:11 PM Mr. Silver

(applauds!)

1:15 PM Mr. Silver

(scenes of happy skipping kids pulling belts of ammo off rolls, running hands though bins of bullets, field stripping weapons...the one kid in the back gets smacked by the counter if you look in the right place...)

(Clip from the Candyman - Mr. Silver)

1:17 PM Mr. Blue

I never noticed that with the counter.

It's at Field & Stream instead of a candy shop.

1:20 PM Mr. Blue

I found that movie creepy as a kid.

1:21 PM Mr. Silver

It is creepy.

The new one is creepier.

The book is also creepy.

1:21 PM Mr. Blue

Basically killing/harming bad kids.

1:23 PM Mr. Silver

Nobody died, of course.

1:25 PM Mr. Blue

It might say that in the book, but the film is vague.

1:27 PM Mr. Silver

The Depp one shows them all alive as intended.

"If you turn off all the lights and say 'Willie Wonka' three times looking into a mirror while eating chocolate, he'll show up and destroy you through exploiting your psychological problems."

1:28 PM Mr. Blue

Ah does it? I saw it, but I don't remember it.

I actually like the Wilder one better...creepy is better than boring.

1:29 PM Mr. Amethyst

I love the Wilder version.

2:11 PM Mr. Silver

Dahl hated that movie.

2:14 PM Mr. Blue

Because someone rewrote parts of his script.

2:33 PM Mr. Silver

Dahl wrote a James Bond script I liked but I can't recall which.

2:33 PM Mr. Blue

“You Only Live Twice”

I started watching that one but got interrupted.

I wanted to see Japanese Bond girls.

2:34 PM Mr. Silver

I like it for a lot of things. It's silly for others.

So...”Classic Bond”.

Tiger "I have saki...or a martini?"

Bond "Oh, no.  I like saki."

(Dahl) "Cut!"

(Lewis Gilbert) "What, Roald?!  What now?"

(Dahl) "I clearly wrote SACKY."

(Gilbert) "Yeah...but it's pronou-"

(Dahl) "SACKY!"

(Gilbert)  "Fine! OK people, let's go again."

2:37 PM Mr. Blue

Oh yeah, the “sack-eee” line.

2:38 PM Mr. Silver

Perhaps it was brilliant irony.  James claimed to have achieved a first in oriental languages earlier.