Friday, January 24, 2014

Day 278 - (Sings) "She Came In Like An Intellectuaaaallll!", The Adventures Of Paddington Bear Will Be Rated R For Graphic Violence & Blood, A Cracker By Any Other Name Would Disappoint, Not-So-Exotic Exotic Treats, Doesn't Rind Imply You Don't Want That Part?, No Panicking Without The Permission Of Management, Mr. Brown Is Beginning To Suspect, Mr. Brown On Being A Black & White American, "He Says He Made His Fortune In Teaching", Hollywood To Give Gritty Update To Beatrix Potter Classic, and Nailed The Troubleshoot

Mr. Brown
I watched that video
It’s funny
1:02 PM Mr. Silver
To the right of that video:               (It was at the time.  New link added. - Mr. Silver)
I‘m guessing she graduated from underaged drinking years ago. 
1:06 PM Mr. Silver
"Miley Cyrus Spotted Reading Book In Latest Shocker"
1:13 PM Mr. Silver
"From all available clues, Ms. Cyrus (shown here with tongue in mouth) appeared to be reading a work by Stephen Hawking, and the 2012 New York Times Crossword Puzzle collection is to her left, with a PEN on top!"
There...that story would surprise me.
Mr. Brown
Um, ok.  They are making a live action Paddington Bear.
8:10 AM Mr. Silver
"No one will be admitted during the Paddington/Bull Moose battle."
8:11 AM Mr. Blue
Heh
8:11 AM Mr. Silver
"Paddington loved marmalade...and raw salmon."
8:13 AM Mr. Blue
How come there are so many gentle bears in childrens' books/cartoons.
Bears are nasty.
8:14 AM Mr. Amethyst
Bears *can be* nasty.
8:15 AM Mr. Silver
"Using forced perspective techniques, Paddington was reduced from an 1800lb 8' long quadruped to a 2' tall biped.  It took rhino tranquilizer and 15 men were hospitalized donning the hat and coat every day."
8:16 AM Mr. Blue
LOL



Mr. Silver
8:08 AM Mr. Silver
What an a-hole.  His prison time is probably going to be painful.
8:10 AM Mr. Brown
It sounds to me like he was one of those people not at the point of taking another child and doing something yet, so he was starting with his own.
Good thing they got him, because he would have graduated to getting other children.
8:16 AM Mr. Silver
Has anyone ever heard any good news happening at a Cracker Barrel?
(does search)
Well...dumping company news, propaganda, finance stuff...
#1 is Family of 3 fatally shot
#2 Ohio man kills wife, daughter
8:18 AM Mr. Amethyst
Moral of the story - never go to Cracker Barrel.
8:19 AM Mr. Silver
#3 CB products barred from grocery stores
#4 Paula Deen fans want CB partnership... I guess that can be read either way...
(Bonus #5 with the Duck Dynasty scandal crap...this segment is a few months behind the news. - Mr. Silver)
8:20 AM Mr. Brown
Well, she does the right kind of cooking for that place.
I just like shopping in the store part.
8:37 AM Mr. Blue
I've never been in one.
I remember being young and thinking "Cracker Barrel doesn't sound appetizing”.
8:37 AM Mr. Brown
I don't say “Hey, lets drive a hour to go to Cracker Barrel!”
But if its where I am, I might go in.
8:44 AM Mr. Silver
I realize the historical necessities of long distance travel, provisioning and limits of old technology...
But really...I hear Cracker Barrel and all I see is stale weevily sea biscuit.
8:45 AM Mr. Silver
(ad) "Come eat at the Cracker Barrel!" 
(me) "Blehhhhh. If my past life as a sailor is still turned off by that, how would this be appealing to me now? Hey!  Let's open a restaurant called 'Salt Horse Barrel'! Yeah!”
8:46 AM Mr. Blue
Just the name puts a dry taste in my mouth.
Like... all they have is crackers?
In barrels?
8:46 AM Mr. Silver
"Come eat at the 'Fresh Bread From The Oven'"?  Ok, I'm there dude.
8:47 AM Mr. Brown
Yeah, why would you eat from a cracker barrel unless you had to?
You know that shit is stale



9:00 AM Mr. Brown
What I’m saying is, you eat an Oreo, and that’s 200 calories.
Just make sure you don't go over your diet's calories.
I don't know if that’s how much an Oreo actually has, though. (about 50 – Mr. Silver)
That Usain Bolt guy was eating 100 chicken nuggets a day. (8400 – M.S.)
9:02 AM Mr. Brown
His body was using that many calories up, so had to keep fueling it.
9:02 AM Mr. Silver
I just generally feel disappointed eating Oreos.
9:02 AM Mr. Silver
"Tricked again...sigh."
9:03 AM Mr. Blue
Yeah, it's the icing that's good.
The cookies themselves are dry and not tasty.
9:03 AM Mr. Brown
They are like hard tack.
I gave Brown Junior a bullseye the other day.
I showed him how to bite the caramel, then eat the icing, then finish the caramel.
He did not like the icing.
Told Mrs. Brown to eat it.
LOL
9:05 AM Mr. Silver
“Try this tube of tarry cooked sugar wrapped around this plug of sugar paste, son!”
I was looking around exotic recipes in a magazine waiting for Mrs. Silver for something and ran across a chef's recipe for a traditional Mexican sweetener ingredient. 
"Takes a long time but is really good and you should take the time! Take X amount of whole milk and put it on the stove, low, and lightly cover it just to keep foreign particles out."
me "Already doesn't sound very Mexican...I'll leave it uncovered.  What's the next step?"
9:09 AM Mr. Blue
"Add tortillas, with cheese, meat & vegetables."
9:09 AM Mr. Silver
"Then you just let it cook down for 3 days and you end up with a delicious smooth syrup!"
9:10 AM Mr. Blue
Yeah, just leave your stove on for 3 days.
No wonder houses are so dilapidated in Mexico.
9:10 AM Mr. Silver
Me "That sounds amazing!  That sounds so amazing it's called dulche de leche and you can buy it in a can at any decently stocked grocery!  And it doesn't take 3 days!"



12:21 PM Mr. Brown
I believe that pork skins should only be called chicharrones.
They would sell more that way.
I have salt and pepper ones.
12:24 PM Mr. Silver
Probably.
Compared to "Pork Rinds".
Name any other “rind” of anything that you don't throw in the trash.
(Some cheeses, on reflection.  However, those aren't "skin" - Mr. Silver)
12:24 PM Mr. Brown
LOL
“Deer Rinds”
Well, we don't eat cow rinds, but we don't throw them away.
12:26 PM Mr. Silver
Chicken Rinds
12:28 PM Mr. Brown
For those of you that like the chicken skin, I give you the rind of the chicken.
Ooo
Turkey Rinds
That would be good.
12:29 PM Mr. Silver
Heh...I remember when The Man Show was on, they were intro-ing new products
12:31 PM Mr. Silver
"What's the best part of Kentucky Fried Chicken?  The skins!  Right!  So we have a new product here...” (pulls out KFC bucket with superfat colonel face on it, labeled KFC Skins)
12:33 PM Mr. Blue
I never thought of the "rind" part; literally the skin of the fruit/veggie or, in this case, animal.



Mr. Silver
So I opened up the emergency action plan document just now.
I like this section:
        1. Above all – REMAIN CALM!
        2. Proceed to the nearest alarm station activate the alarm ONLY IF ASKED
The writer seems to have panicked when writing point #1.
Point #2 - so if the building is blazing, I should seek out a supervisor first?
2:19 PM Mr. Brown
“In case of emergency: break glass, grab key, open lock box, retrieve other key, walk up twelve flights of stairs to extinguisher locker, use key to open locker, take out extinguisher, use.”
2:25 PM Mr. Silver
No!  It's not use...it's "then ask for permission to use".
2:30 PM Mr. Brown
Ah.
Much better.



2:36 AM Mr. Brown
I don't know why, but I always see every client as a crazy person trying to put one over on us.
2:36 PM Mr. Silver
You're a marginal paranoiac.
It's OK...you're among friends...maybe.



9:43 AM Mr. Brown
9:44 AM Mr. Blue
Heheh
9:52 AM Mr. Brown
(rephrases Mr. Brown's innocent thoughts delivered via an unbelievably racist phrase – Mr. Silver)
I believe there are lots of people that have no clue they have black African ancestors because there is simply no way to tell without digging through the family tree, or taking a genetic test.
9:52 AM Mr. Blue
It goes both ways... A lot, if not most, African Americans partially white European.
9:52 AM Mr. Brown
Yeah.
People like that guy will just argue that they don't look it, so aren't.
“I'm not dark. That's what I’m racist against.”
9:54 AM Mr. Amethyst
You're racist against people who don't know their race?
9:55 AM Mr. Brown
I'm not saying me.
I meant what they would say.
You could tell a Neo Nazi he is 14% Congolese, but they will still say “Ok, but I’m not black.”
10:00 AM Mr. Blue
Yeah. But I don’t think a racist person is going to be less racist if they find out a white person is half black.
Nor do I think that a black person that's half white faces less prejudice in their life.
It can be about being a *known* minority.
10:02 AM Mr. Silver
This brings to mind our hick neighbors we had for a while.
Right out of nowhere, the ass announces: "She might not look it, but (wife) is a quarter nigger!"
She was so embarrassed...sadly, I couldn't tell if it was for him or herself.  Ugh!
10:07 AM Mr. Silver
We never really talked much after that.
And no...there is no possible way anyone would know from just looking at her, because she was pretty much exactly Flo the waitress from the "Alice" TV show.
10:11 AM Mr. Brown
Is it racist for a 1/4 African American to wear black face?



Mr. Blue
He wanted me to ship (large expensive item) to him for free.
10:27 AM Mr. Silver
Good luck.
10:27 AM Mr. Blue
I said no, but he kept asking anyway.
His house looks like the Biltmore on Google street view.
10:27 AM Mr. Silver
"Ah...are you of the Boston Cheapbastards?  Lovely family...Thaddeus Cheapbastard III disappeared into the restroom and stiffed me for lunch at The Russian Tea Room once."
10:29 AM Mr. Blue
He says he is an English teacher at a state university. Something fishy there.
10:40 AM Mr. Silver
Yup.
Perhaps he also owns England.
10:41 AM Mr. Brown
Probably a duke.
LOL
10:42 AM Mr. Silver
"And that, class, is why the show should have been called 'Deviating Towards Criminality'...I should know."
10:51 AM Mr. Blue
Hehehe



Mr. Blue
“Search under way for missing Westwood man Bunnie Thompson, 48, who went missing Thursday after 2 p.m.”
Nice name.
Check the local tomato & lettuce gardens.
3:18 PM Mr. Silver
"Mister McGregor was charged today in the kidnapping and murder of Bunnie Thompson."
"Police reconstruction of the crime shows that Mr. Thompson was examining McGregor's carrot crop when the situation turned violent.  Thompson was first trapped in a gooseberry net, but wriggled free only to be captured under a giant sieve, tortured in a water barrel and finally stomped to death."



7:09 AM Mr. Green
"You’ll need something thin and straight to push the button in the little hole on the device, like a toothpick..."
"Does it have to be metal?"
*forehead slap*
“Do you have to be alive and calling me?”
7:15 AM Mr. Silver
"It must be electrum, or ivory from an Indian elephant...  No…  No, African won't do…  We could try with an amber or lapis lazuli rod, but i can't guarantee success."
7:17 AM Mr. Green
"Do you have any metal toothpicks? That would be perfect!"
7:19 AM Mr. Silver
A rather rare item.
"My people call them 'nails'."
7:19 AM Mr. Green
LMAO!
at

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