Day 198 - Tennis Has The Requisite Equipment, The Red Newb, Fleeing Like a Rock Star, It Would Be The Best Olympics Of All Time, Smurf The Smurfing Snorks Into The Snorking Sun, "James", Does Mr. Blue Have A Tiny Casting Couch?, and Don't Drink Or Be A Kennedy & Drive

Mr. Silver

Client’s 1st name: "Tennis"

9:15 AM Mr. Brown

Last name: “Playa”

9:16 AM Mr. Silver

"Is that a man's or a woman's name?  Nevermind...Tennis has balls."

9:47 AM Mr. Brown

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manfred_von_Richthofen

9:55 AM Mr. Silver

What a guy.

He'd probably suck at WWI dog-fighting simulators.

"Zis is krrrap!  Was de hell?  I schott him like thrrree towsund times!"

9:57 AM Mr. Brown

Well, he did get taken down by one shot.

8:39 AM Mr. Yellow

http://entertainment.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/07/09/12642955-ted-nugents-drummer-flees-police-in-golf-cart?lite

lol

9:03 AM Mr. Yellow

I loved how he was fleeing the cops and picked up chicks at the same time.

9:06 AM Mr. Silver

heh

9:09 AM Mr. Yellow

Now that is Rock and Roll

9:20 AM Mr. Silver

Yup

His priorities in order = mayhem, chicks, fleeing police

9:22 AM Mr. Yellow

*nod*

1:14 PM Mr. Yellow

So, Cleveland sports radio question: Can you root for Team USA when Lebron James is on it?

1:18 PM Mr. Silver

Shouldn’t you?

1:19 PM Mr. Yellow

There is a great hatred of King James here in Cleveland, and it is quite a dilemma for Clevelanders.

Not me.

I think they should not have pros play.

1:19 PM Mr. Silver

Agreed.

Also, if that's an issue in Cleveland, they need a plague to hit there or something.

1:20 PM Mr. Yellow

I know other countries started playing pros and we finally caved and put the first dream team together 20 years ago.

The Olympics should have no pro players in any sport.

1:23 PM Mr. Yellow

They also need to go back to the original Olympic rules and play in the nude, even in winter.

1:38 PM Mr. Silver

That would be nude men only.

(Original rules)

1:39 PM Mr. Yellow

No.

I want to change that rule: Women Only

1:39 PM Mr. Silver

That would be a big crowd draw.

1:39 PM Mr. Yellow

It will be the highest rated women’s sporting event of all time.

1:40 PM Mr. Silver

The All Nude Women's Olympics

1:40 PM Mr. Yellow

Look; I could live with both men and women, but I’d only be watching the women’s events.

1:40 PM Mr. Silver

"Team Showering"

1:40 PM Mr. Yellow

lol

1:40 PM Mr. Silver

"Greco-Roman Pillowfighting"

1:40 PM Mr. Yellow

Team nude car washing

1:43 PM Mr. Yellow

Couples figure skating would look like a hardcore porn.

1:45 PM Mr. Yellow

The Besti squat and the spread eagle could be joined with the back door penetrator and the double penetrator.

1:48 PM Mr. Silver

(Skating commentator) "And she swings gracefully from the double-wide leg spin into a Hamill Camel-hump."

1:52 PM Mr. Yellow

You see the possibilities.

1:52 PM Mr. Silver

In my head, there are many events.

2:59 PM Mr. Yellow

*nod*

8:28 AM Mr. Brown

Did you know the Snorks are real, just like the Smurfs?

8:29 AM Mr. Gray

Only to you, Mr. Brown.

8:29 AM Mr. Amethyst

Dude.  Snorks......horrid.

8:30 AM Mr. Silver

They lost me at "Come along with the Snorks!" as the first lyric in their song.

On the other hand, I ended up seeing a fair bit of The Smurfs over the years, and liked the recent movie. 

Snorks aint gettin' no movie.

8:31 AM Mr. Gray

Snorks were just a ripoff of Smurfs.  I hated it.

8:43 AM Mr. Amethyst

"You’re a Smurf hole, Brainy Smurf"

8:45 AM Mr. Silver

Roomie in college had this tendency to blurt out: "Smurf me Papa Smurf!  Smurf me in my Smurf hole!"

I’m not sure why...it never matched the situation we were in.

8:46 AM Mr. Amethyst

Mine had the “La La La” song on record.  He was a DJ.  He made a fantastic dance song to it one night.

8:46 AM Mr. Silver

heh

8:47 AM Mr. Amethyst

Perhaps it wasn’t as epic as I remember, but back then I was under the influence of a plant that - if you should happen to light it on fire and breathe the smoke - had some effects like happy, hungry, sleepy

8:47 AM Mr. Silver

Dopey, Doc, Sneezy and Bashful

8:48 AM Mr. Amethyst

Fantastic song.

9:01 AM Mr. Silver

Morning Mr. Blue.

Snorks vs Smurfs

9:02 AM Mr. Blue

Hey honkies

9:02 AM Mr. Silver

What up my Snorkies?

9:06 AM Mr. Brown

I just think it’s funny that the name is “Snork”, which would mean that the thing on the top of their head is a snorkel of a type, but they are never seen going to the surface to get air and they have no gills.

“On today’s episode, the Snorks all drown.”

9:10 AM Mr. Blue

Heheh

9:12 AM Mr. Gray

I try to have a decent conversation about Cryptozoology, and Mr. Brown brings up Snorks. Why am I not surprised?

9:13 AM Mr. Silver

Can a Snork be propelled at a high enough speed to pass through the sun? 

We don't know, but we're going to try to do it, one Snork at a time, until we succeed or run out of Snorks.

9:30 AM Mr. Brown

Only the orange ones.

9:42 AM Mr. Blue

"Here at the Brown Lab for Objects Passing Through the Sun, or BLOPTS, we take pride in our research.  So far we've shot a myriad of objects at the sun to see if they pass through:  a fork, a microwave, a larger fork, a plush teddy bear, a spoon and a tube of toothpaste."

9:53 AM Mr. Amethyst

This should help for your research: http://www.eyeonthesky.org/activities_pdf/XXsun_teacher.script.pdf

9:58 AM Mr. Brown

Hmm.  The sun’s core is 150 times the density of water.

I wonder what that can be compared to, for how hard it is.

Ah, its 20 times denser than iron.

10:01 AM Mr. Silver

So you could fire George W Bush's brain through it with no problem.

10:12 AM Mr. Silver

James ... still bugs me as a name... 

What's it plural for?

Jam?  One Jam, two James?

“Exactly how many James are you?”

 

10:38 AM Mr. Blue

In a drunken stupor, I ended up posting a Craigslist ad looking for midgets in the Pittsburgh area for some unknown film project.

10:38 AM Mr. Silver

Heh

10:38 AM Mr. Blue

I’m gettin' some emails… I have to tell them that I forgot what I needed them for and I’d rather not remember.

10:40 AM Mr. Silver

I see a nearly all-midget cast doing "Snow White and the Seven Giants"

10:42 AM Mr. Blue

I believe it involved Rule 34.

10:44 AM Mr. Amethyst

.... *slowly walks backward out of room*

3:04 PM Mr. Blue

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2012/07/kerry-kennedy-charged-with-driving-while-impaired-after-crash/

Can we ban all Kennedys from driving cars?

3:51 PM Mr. Silver

(cop) "License, registration and proof of genealogy, sir."

(Driver, heavy Massachusetts accent) "Whot do you need thaht faw?"

(cop) "Uh huh...Step out of the ‘cah’, please..."

3:53 PM Mr. Amethyst

lol

3:54 PM Mr. Gray

“Let’s see...smashed into a bridge....bottles falling out of the car....possible dead body in the back seat. Sir, are you a Kennedy? (runs license) Yup, Kennedy…Hands on the hood please.  We've had enough of your family's foolishness.”

3:55 PM Mr. Blue

"Come ahn officah!  I'm tryin' tah get to the ayuh-po't!" 

"Airport?!  You Kennedys don't know when to quit do you!"

3:55 PM Mr. Gray

LMAO

3:56 PM Mr. Blue

All Kennedys must resort to traveling by bicycles equipped with flashing lights so they can be easily identified.